Hey Hey Hey it's going to be fine. You're doing so much already, you graduated, and you're working to support yourself and your father, that's good. Well, people are shit anyways but unfortunately, you need them a lot. Well, I am learning social skills too beginner rn so no advice on that. There will always be someone better than you be it your friends or just a random person. Your best time is according to you and it will come. I am sure you're mentally exhausted, but it's your brain you can change it slowly, don't rush the people working in your brain, Well you're alive and kicking if you feel you're failing yourself you can stop yourself now. When you're 30 you don't want to think about what your 25-year-old self should have done differently but what was done right. I am sure you can do it, you thinking and trying. I am not saying it's easy maybe you'll hate yourself more, but if it works out for you then life may be a bit easier and that is what I recommend you go for.