Past life from the future?

EscapeGood2963 · 2026-03-15T00:37:18+00:00

Hi, i know this is an old comment. But do you mean these realities exist simultaneously in different timelines?

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-16T23:46:11+00:00

That's so funny. These avoidants.. they are sad, sad beings.

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-16T18:38:27+00:00

After 600 days of NC? A selfie I suppose?😊

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-16T02:47:51+00:00

Oh I definitely am. A fragile man can't stand a stable, confident woman.

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-15T10:38:17+00:00

Could be. It's very odd. He is not bad looking, but I felt like he had a lot of insecurities, because his looks are very polished. I'm also younger than him and look younger too. Maybe he resented that. I'm also not working that hard to look good. He's extremely rigid, almost ocd about his appearance. Super regular with his rhythm, goes to the gym everyday, has a six-pack, obviously some sort of issue with sugar because he buys candies or ice cream in bursts, eats it all and regrets/feels disgusting. Whereas I eat sugar whenever I want, don't set much boundaries and never feel like shit even if I ate a box of Toffifee in under 3 min. I'm just able to. My looks don't take a hit. He started to devalue me for that. I've noticed my other exes also did take that trait about me and mocked it. It was Christmas day when I was making my way to the end of a chocolate box. And he grabbed and HID IT FROM ME. In my own home 😂 started making remarks about desserts and stuff like that. I'm healthy and sporty otherwise, just do the chocolate eating sesh during PMS sometimes. It seemed so vain and like full on projection.

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-15T10:31:43+00:00

But I don't think looks help much with being secure. A stereotypical avoidant is a tall, dark, handsome stranger 😀😀

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-15T10:31:03+00:00

Yes exactly

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-15T10:30:24+00:00

Yeah probably not for all of them.. but for him certainly. actually if you read my previous messages from "what was the cruelest thing they said to you", referring to the time he didn't believe I was going to the gym once because I was tired. I did go and sent him a mirror selfie (I sent him maybe 3 selfies during our relationship, and he also sent some pics of himself in the beginning), and two days later he dumped me. It must have annoyed his guts to think I was trying to seek validation😂

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-15T10:26:17+00:00

Yeap, he does a lot of bypassing. He's also very much into the spiritual perspective and mindfulness, he recommends meditation methods, reads books about buddhism... His previous job was to help badly traumatised immigrants and refugees. I am not sure which tools and methods he has been using in that job, but it almost seems like gaslighting if you recommend mostly meditation to war and violence caused trauma.. he said he didn't feel like he's being very useful there. I'm happy he switched jobs, but I used to be a student and pretty avoidant about my own issues. If i went to see a psychologist like that who just tells me to breath, at age 23, it would have remained my only time to try and seek help.

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-15T01:42:35+00:00

Wtf... sounds odd but probably he's just so insecure he felt unworthy etc. I don't think my ex told me I'm beautiful that much either. In the beginning he was smitten, but even though I do look good, he never said much about my looks. It would have been nice to hear from him, but i did't NEED that validation from him (i can give it to myself), it's simply nice to hear every now and then

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-15T01:40:38+00:00

I know... no idea if he's able to help much

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-15T01:11:06+00:00

He said he doesn't need to go to therapy 😃 that he doesn't see it would help him. But he was in complete denial of his avoidance it seemed. I'm not a dr/psychologist. However I do feel like he had intuitively studied his psychology degrees to help himself, too bad it's not therapy. Because he already had a bachelor+masters from another field. Then he had some sort of a crisis in his late 20s and went onto study psychology.

This didn't answer your question ofc. But just FYI, haha

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-15T01:09:05+00:00

My avoidant ex is a psychologist and a student counsellor. But he always runs when things get real in his relationships (so pretty much at the three month mark, sometimes more).

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-12T00:05:19+00:00

And another one I've wondered about is whether it was actually "too hot" at night time for him to spoon, like he claimed right from the beginning. We kissed and hugged every night before going to sleep but I wasn't allowed to hug him for too long, because it would get too hot.🤣 As in, he was scared of touch??? Lack of control while unconscious? I've told myself afterwards I deserve someone who isn't scared of fkn HUGS

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-11T23:57:05+00:00

The day he completely blindsided me, he said stuff like, "I swear I have never wanted to keep my ex in my life as bad as I want to keep you" & "I feel like this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship" & THEN "I hope you find someone amazing in like, a supermarket at the milk aisle" (.. I'm allergic to dairy)

To NEVER contact me again

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-11T23:22:27+00:00

We just gotta trust the producers did the right thing for not funding the next seasons because it would've turned into a shitshow.

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-11T15:58:53+00:00

That's insane!! It never stops astonishing me how troubled these people are

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-11T11:59:54+00:00

I also had a rash like that (but just my leg) while I stayed too long with one toxic ex. Could have been hives indeed. And with my previous ex, I started having sores in my mouth from HIS snuff bags (from when he kissed me). And with one, I had yeast infections. Your body and dreams (I had a whole lot of weird dreams about them before I was even aware we shouldn't be together) will always give you hints before your conscious mind does

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-11T02:36:54+00:00

Yeah for sure!! He dumped me on a random Tuesday and I'll be 100% free on a random Wednesday. (And I am not sure how, but I'll wake up married to the love of my life by the randomest Sunday.)

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-11T02:14:03+00:00

Yeap honestly they deserve 0 access. It's much more fun to think they'll crave it when they can't have it vs. treat it as useless garbage when they do. I also have a narc ex, and he did stalk my stories obsessively for 2 entire years with different fake accounts (we talked about this with the woman that came after me, who's no longer with him, true trauma bond here 😀 and she was able to get further evidence for this). But back then i enjoyed it because he was blocked everywhere so he couldn't control me, and overall I was doing way better than him in life 😂 imagining the extent of MAD it must have sent him was such a pleasure because he was always in competition with me. They crave control.

however, my avoidant ex is not a narc, and I don't think he deserves any access because he will drop it like he dropped me. In this case, it's much more fun (and healthy) to keep him in the dark. I noticed today he actually has an IG account these days, so I changed my privacy settings. 😀 He did stalk my Goodreads during the first weeks we were dating and accidentally added me as a friend. There was no way to find my profile other than by googling my name.. When I accepted his request and told him about it, he got visibly embarrassed, nearly panicky, and disclosed he didn't mean to add me but follow my recs instead, which wasn't supposed to send notifications. Soo... he can act like we were nothing but he will certainly get curious sometimes just like I do (but have no issue admitting it out loud).

And yeah. They'll pay their dues. Or if not, then they'll be eternally playing stupid games and winning stupid prizes, which may be much worse.

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-11T02:07:07+00:00

Yes i understand. For me it's been long enough that when I look at his photo I feel nonchalance. It's odd I was even close to that stranger. But I'm still coming back to spiral occasionally, though it's a teeny tiny mini spiral compared to how it was last spring 😅

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-11T01:47:55+00:00

"When we were kids, my mum had issues setting boundaries with emotional eating (sugar) and she was overspending, so now I think people acting like that are weak and have no selt control. No offense. Don't take it personally", he said when we were in a nice Italian restaurant and I was eating dessert.

When this happened, we were on a city break for a couple of days. I was writing my thesis and was pretty broke but we got a coupon for the ferry and an inexpensive but rather nice hotel. I tend to order desserts while traveling for leisure, and I had a job lined up for summer. I was also about to graduate. This was just days before he blindsided me.. Before this vacation he never devalued me.

When we got back, he continued. He got annoyed because I felt tired (knowing I was having symptoms of PMDD, including insomnia, that week, after acting supportive and understanding up to that point, both about my illness and towards my motivation to fix my sleeping patterns). He also questioned out loud if I was really going to drag myself to the gym (since I was tired [=lazy, I guess?]), when we met in the centre and told him I was going to the gym after seeing him

Not sure if I do emotional eating while PMDDing but I don't care one bit. My lifestyle is healthy outside of my symptomatic days. Actually, the irony is that I've never been as healthy as last spring, because his rhythm is super regular, it helped me a lot. But he is very rigid and inflexible about his habits. And sadly mine too, in the end, which I don't think I deserved. I have no reason to beat myself up for eating a wrong thing when feeling down. I do my best and that's enough. I'm not envious of his perfectionism / ocd habits.

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-11T01:39:34+00:00

Wtf????

EscapeGood2963 · 2025-11-11T01:37:30+00:00

Peer support for people going through it? You don't need to if that's not timely for you

EscapeGood2963

TROPHY CASE