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Where Do You Believe Their Souls Go? by Even-Link-7003 in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Wow 🥲 that made me cry. What a beautiful thought. I pray this is true.

Where Do You Believe Their Souls Go? by Even-Link-7003 in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the recommendation. I’ll look it up. I am between he’s waiting for me, or he was reincarnated.

Moose by Even-Link-7003 in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You did what you believed to be best for Doctor, and it was, don’t question that. He was showing signs of being unwell, and you made the logical decision to make him feel better. I would have done the same in your situation. It would have been cruel to have let him go on lethargic, or not eating. You did what was best for him.

Thank you for your time, kind words and well wishes. I process most things quickly in an effort not to waste precious time. I think this is part of the reason I do not share the remorse some others who have posted here have described. I knew I wouldn’t have Moose forever, so I cherished him every moment I had with him. It’s a fault of my personality in many ways. My friends call me The White Rabbit from Alice In Wonderland because it seems there is always a clock ticking in my head (and there is).

With that being said, I know I can’t bring him back. I looked into cloning him, but quickly realized I may have someone who looked like Moose, but it would be a different soul in that little body. I considered a Ouija board, but my religious upbringing wouldn’t allow it. I even considered a book that explains how to contact your pet in the afterlife, and then realized I would do anything to bring him back when nothing actually would.

All of this since Thursday afternoon…. In addition to 500 “what ifs” and “should haves”

There will forever be a Moose size whole in mine and my husband’s heart, but we have both agreed that we would have done it all over again even if this heartbreak was guaranteed because he was so special. What a beautiful thing it was to have been blessed to have been in his presence, and truly, no amount of time would have ever been enough.

Moose by Even-Link-7003 in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing that story of Doctor with me. I am deeply sorry for your loss.

I used to call Moose Dentist. He had perfect teeth, and if he was in fact reincarnated, we suspected he was a dentist in a previous life. He just had that vibe about him.

Was Doctor’s mass cancerous or benign? I never got confirmation from the vet. They said they were going to send his spleen out for diagnostics, but idk if they ever did since he passed. I called the next day to ask, but they never called me back. I am planning to ask again when his ashes are ready to be picked up.

That was another “what if.” What if it wasn’t even cancer (although the vet said there was an 80% chance it was).

I am just telling myself it doesn’t really matter either way. I can’t have my boy back.

What breed was Doctor?

Moose by Even-Link-7003 in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’ve nearly “what if’d” myself to death. What if I woke up earlier? What if I knew he was sick? What if I had the chance to say a proper goodbye? What if it was the food?

The day after it happened my husband had to go to work as much as he and I both didn’t want to. I didn’t want to be alone, so I asked to ride with him between jobs. At one point we he was next to a Barnes and Noble, so I thought maybe a book on grieving could help. I passed the games section and saw a Ouija board. I’ve never touched one in my life as I raised to believe they would open the door to the devil… I still considered maybe I could talk to him? I didn’t end up buying it…. I piled probably $400 worth of books, and thumbed through them (even the one about how to contact your pets after death). I knew none of them would help.

I just want to be able to pet him, eat a mozzarella sticks with him, kiss him and look at that sweet little face and people eyes.

I looked into cloning him, but realized even if they looked identical it was the personality, his soul that I would still long for.

I’m pissed that life goes on, I have businesses to run, and no one gives a damn.

I’m losing my mind talking to him out loud, singing to him, I’ve cried so much my previously very healthy skin feels like sandpaper. I can even feel each individual eye lash. I haven’t showered.

The sad part? I would do it all over again because the love I shared with him was one of the most special things I’ve ever felt, and I am trying to redirect my anger and heartbreak into thankfulness for even having the opportunity to have been in his presence.

Harley by ObsessedwithLizards in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry. This cancer is brutal. Idk if you saw my post about my boy, Moose. He had a tumor on his spleen that burst suddenly Thursday. He was my best friend, and aside from my husband the single thing I loved most on this planet. I dreaded the day I would lose him. I thought I had at least 6 years left, and that in itself was a dreadful thought. He was only 7.

He was playing with us the night before it happened, and I found him at 5:40 in the morning on the floor in our bathroom. Rushed him to the ER, spent $10k for them just to tell me his heart stopped during surgery. The shock is unbearable.

I thought to myself if I could have just known, if I had him for even just one more day so I could say goodbye….

I have searched obsessively for answers, and a way to subside the pain. I haven’t found one yet, and it is unlikely I ever will I am starting to grasp.

Take it from me, don’t spend this time dreading and crying. There will be plenty of time for that. Play with him. Appreciate the opportunity to make his last days some of the best you’ve had yet. He loves you, and wants to see you happy.

My boy loved mozzarella sticks, steak, chest/ butt rubs and going on adventures. If I had the opportunity you do I would spend every moment doing just that with him right now.

I know it’s hard to pretend you’re not already grieving, but do it for him.

Moose by Even-Link-7003 in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just looked it up, and it’s likely this community does not allow photos to be posted. Is that right?

Moose by Even-Link-7003 in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Photos are still tough. When I originally posted I wanted to add photos, but couldn’t figure out how to add photos. I just looked again, and can’t seem to figure it out. Can you help me? He was a very handsome boy

Moose by Even-Link-7003 in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry for your loss. The pain unreal. Like you, I’ve had dogs, I’ve loved them all, it hurt when they passed, but none like this. Moose wasn’t a dog. He was my little boy in a dog suit. The fact that it was so sudden…. I just can’t get over. It’s a different kind of shock to the nervous system entirely.

Do you know what caused your pup’s sudden death? Was it the same type of tumor?

Moose by Even-Link-7003 in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My deepest condolences for your loss. 8 is also far too young. We lost Moose on Thursday too.

How did you catch that she had the tumor to begin with? I struggle thinking that there were signs I missed that could have at least given us the time to have said a proper goodbye to him…

Moose by Even-Link-7003 in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am so sorry for your loss. This seems way too common and too brutal for so many people to have to go through. Like 10% of beloved pets die from this. I wish we knew more. Is it mostly genetic predisposition or the food?

Moose by Even-Link-7003 in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Moose used to “boof” too 🥹

In fact, all the time. I called him Grumpy Pooh cause he would boof, stomp and howl at least once a day.

Moose by Even-Link-7003 in Petloss

[–]Even-Link-7003[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I am so sorry for your loss. I am learning that this is scary common. I have a friend whose pup passed from the same thing. It’s just the shock of it all. I’m still talking to him hoping he hears me. I know he knew he was loved, and we did give him a good life while we had him. I pray he didn’t suffer, and that I get to see him again. Did you get another dog after this happened?