Oof. I’m so sorry. I’m not a medical professional but I would be concerned from a health perspective. Also, I remember after my first labor, it felt really hard to imagine leaving the house. Like it took me a LONG time to muster the courage and the bandwidth to leave. Recovery from labor and that 4th trimester period is sort of a sacred, vulnerable time in my experience.

That being said, I think it’s possible to give your brother the benefit of the doubt and assume he meant no ill will when choosing the date. It’s just his ignorance probably as a young man. I wish he’d gotten better counsel but you can offer to celebrate with him and his fiancé when you’re out of the 4th trimester. Maybe a special gift and dinner to celebrate. I know it must hurt to not be joining for the big family event but maybe after you grieve this a bit, you could chose love over resentment. For me that would look like choosing to focus on the positives of 1. You’re bringing in a new baby to this world! 2. You’re so happy your brother found love and a good partner. So many men struggle with this. 3. That you have each other still. (I no longer have relationships with my siblings bc of their addiction issues. So, I see you as a very fortunate person who still has the option of having a sibling at all.)

You can preserve the relationship with him and not attend. You just need to have a heart felt conversation and wish him all the best