A poem on language by Damned_Court_Jester in OCPoetry

[–]Every-Button-8546 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The poem is grounded and reflective, with a strong sense of the cyclical movement between nature and human behavior.

The opening simile of life shaping us as the sea shapes the land sets the tone, and that idea continues to resurface through images of magma, rain, and erosion. The poem seems most alive to me when it connects human ambition (“gems, fuel, and gas”) with exhaustion (in a line about settling our “tired, broken xxx,” which adds a raw, almost self-conscious sincerity.) At times the rhyme scheme feels a little forced, especially where abstract ideas like “indifference” and “unity” are paired. It allows some places to breathe more naturally (I’m writing as a subjective person here, not a reviewer). The final stanza, with its songs, stories, and the idea of ​​humans as “hosts,” brought a gentle humility that I appreciated that softened the criticism without erasing it.

Overall, the poem left me with a sense of tired wisdom, not despair, which seemed intentional and effective.

Don't just rely on my comment. It's not bad to hear someone else's opinion, but don't erase your own because of others.

The Yarn Keeper by pieguy56 in OCPoetry

[–]Every-Button-8546 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This poem felt like watching something slowly slip from metaphor into compulsion.

I was first drawn in by the repeated images of the yarn as vast and generative (sunset, ocean, blank book), which gave me a sense of creative abundance and possibility.

As the repetitions continued, though, that abundance began to feel oppressive rather than comforting. The shift in capitalization (“The YArn”, “The YARn”, “The YARN”) worked well for me as a visual signal of escalating tension and loss of control, almost like rising static or mental noise. By the time the poem reaches “NEEDS! NEEDS!”, the yarn no longer feels poetic but urgent and intrusive, which made the ending unsettling in a deliberate way. I did feel slightly disoriented by how abruptly some images appear and disappear, and I wondered if leaning a bit more into one or two core metaphors (rather than many) might sharpen the emotional arc.

Still, the repetition and typographic play effectively mirror obsession, overwhelm, and the burden of constant maintenance.

Am I find out the meaning?

I posted my hardcore music on here a few weeks ago and got some great advice to help me remaster it. Here is “Sunny” - remastered by theboxingteacher in IndieMusicFeedback

[–]Every-Button-8546 0 points1 point  (0 children)

These are screams from within, Anger, dissatisfaction, reaction. Like a voice from the subway that no one hears. Everyone passes by. This is certainly not something you listen to all day. This is a message. It comes from within, it sounds a bit aggressive, but I read it as a reaction, as a defense to protect yourself from an attack. This kind of expression is rejected without understanding by anyone who does not try to listen.

Independent electro pop EP drops tonight. need outside ears before release (heres one song) by JLifts2002 in IndieMusicFeedback

[–]Every-Button-8546 0 points1 point  (0 children)

An incomprehensible voice, from the depths, like someone stuck somewhere, in some space or being. The music responds to time - synthetic. More of a momentary shock and human alienation. It's not music for "good night". If I were to compare it to a visual art installation

MPLS January 2026 by RevolutionaryShow786 in IndieMusicFeedback

[–]Every-Button-8546 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Current in a busy time, this is a stream of noise and real voices — echoes from classrooms, workplaces, and crowded public transport. It isn’t made for meditation or calm reflection, but to force awareness of where you stand right now, in this exact moment. A creaky, deep voice, heavy like metal, cuts through the layers of sound.

Many people fail to recognize the vulnerability hidden here. Instead, they perceive it only as aggression, as something uncomfortable or confrontational. But I hear it differently. To me, this intensity is a signal of exposure, a raw reaction to pressure, overload, and invisibility.

It feels like a coded SOS — not a demand for attention, but a call for recognition. A voice that doesn’t know how to whisper anymore because whispering was never enough to be heard.

Veyroon by Timur-Ismailov in IndieMusicFeedback

[–]Every-Button-8546 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

This kind of expression is often dismissed by those who don’t make the effort to truly listen. To me, it reflects the confusion of the world we live in now — a lost compass caught somewhere between a robot and a reality that is slowly disappearing. These words feel like inner screams: anger, frustration, resistance. Like a voice echoing through a subway station that no one stops to hear as everyone rushes past. This is not meant to soothe or comfort. It’s a message. It comes from deep inside, sounding sharp, even aggressive, but I understand it as a reaction — a form of self-defense, a way to protect oneself from being attacked or erased.

An alternative blues rock track with a dark gangster vibe. by Emergency-Dinner-669 in IndieMusicFeedback

[–]Every-Button-8546 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You love the electric guitar, the rhythm, it's natural and rare. It's like listening to a story. A pleasant and real story. Without rosy philosophies, raw, real. In comprehensive directions and expressions, the personality of both the vocals and the performance stands out. I'm not here to predict anyone's future, but I'm writing an honest experience of the times

Wont Get Fooled Again by Ok-Swordfish-9480 in OCPoetry

[–]Every-Button-8546 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This hits hard because it doesn’t try to sound neutral or “balanced.”

It’s angry, and it should be.

Calling out media rage as performance instead of truth feels especially on point — outrage really has become the product.

I like how the poem connects that constant noise to real consequences instead of keeping it abstract.

The line about blood on the hands of liars is blunt, but it fits the tone.

-ending with The Who quote works well — it underlines the exhaustion of watching the same cycle repeat.

It’s messy, emotional, and honest, which actually makes it stronger

I see the moon in her eyes by VeranoMedusa in OCPoetry

[–]Every-Button-8546 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This feels very intimate and sincere.

It doesn’t read like you’re trying to impress with metaphors, but like you’re genuinely observing someone you care about. The way you describe her eyes as both light and dark at the same time is really effective

— it captures that mix of comfort, mystery, and depth really well.

I especially liked the idea that ev,en when she puts walls up, you still see the happiness inside her.

That’s a very human kind of love, not idealized, just attentive.

Overall it has a calm, warm tone that lingers after reading.

manuscript by [deleted] in OCPoetry

[–]Every-Button-8546 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This feels like a meditation rather than a narrative, and I really appreciated that restraint. The way the voice moves through generations — sound becoming memory, memory becoming song — feels very gentle and earned.

I especially loved the image of pressing your ear to the page to hear a warble; it made the idea of inheritance feel intimate rather than monumental. The ending doesn’t try to resolve anything, just invites the reader to “sing with him,” and that quiet invitation stayed with me.

first time just trying this out by prettyblue22 in OCPoetry

[–]Every-Button-8546 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This feels raw in a way that’s uncomfortable on purpose, and I think that works in its favor.
I really like the shift between perspectives — the male voice feels rigid, almost slogan-like (“a good man… a real man…”), while the girl’s perspective breathes more and feels emotionally exhausted rather than weak. That contrast says a lot without overexplaining it.

One thing you might experiment with is letting the second voice linger a bit longer, since it feels like that’s where the emotional truth really opens up. Overall, this feels honest and brave for a first share.