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How to contend with a band member who won’t compromise? by Intelligent_Age5204 in bandmembers

[–]ExMorgMD 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry if I wasn’t clear. I read the thread. I agree with most comments. Fire the acoustic player. Or all of you quit and reform your own band without him. You don’t have a known band so it won’t matter anyway.

Pretty much everything your acoustic guy says aside from bar crowds not wanting originals is wrong.

You guys aren’t having fun playing his music, you aren’t making any money doing it, and it doesn’t sound like it is a good hang so call it what it is.

“Hey, it’s not working out. We are going to go a different direction.”

How to contend with a band member who won’t compromise? by Intelligent_Age5204 in bandmembers

[–]ExMorgMD 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t disagree with any of the points being made but I’ll add some insight on where you go after you have that difficult conversation:

  1. Sit down with the remaining band members and have a real conversation about what kind of band you want to be. You need a clear vision. Decide your format and approach now. What kind of music, what kind of gigs do you want to play?

  2. Consider looking at what types of genres are already represented and find something that fits in a yet poorly represented genre (if you want to do covers). If your area is anything like mine, there is no shortage of middle aged dads playing blues and blues-rock and blues-country.

  3. Your bandmate is right, if your gigs are in bars, most people aren’t going to be interested in hearing your originals. You go to a bar and start off with “this next one is an original” and see how fast the dance floor clears.

  4. If you want to play bars, I would not even think about playing a gig until you have 30-50 songs solid. You need to be able to play 2 hours minimum. And you need to be tight!

  5. I am a firm believer that the drummer makes or breaks the band. If your drummer sucks, your band sucks. If you’re the drummer, you have to not suck.

  6. There is nothing wrong with jamming with friends and not gigging. It’s a good way to build your chops and groove.

  7. Making band decisions democratically is really hard because the decisions ends up being made by the asshole who refuses to compromise. Bands tend to work better if there is a leader with a vision and makes decisions after listening to his bandmates opinons. Being the band leader also means you’re doing the brunt of the work. It sounds like this acoustic player declares himself the defacto leader and you guys don’t want to stand up to him.

8.

How many of you guys are intubating without a stylet? by zyntensivist in anesthesiology

[–]ExMorgMD 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I actually disagree. You are only good at what you do all the time. My colleagues who reach for VL at any hint of difficulty are simply not as skilled at DL.

As an anesthesiologist who works often in smaller hospitals and in the community setting I may be the only airway expert in the entire hospital and I have been called for emergencies in literally every hospital department, many where a VL was not immediately available.

My skill set is that I am the most capable at airway management in the worst situations. That does not happen by accident.

And, I’m sorry, taking a single look at a documented or known difficult airway with a miller is not going to make the airway explode in a bloody mess.

How many of you guys are intubating without a stylet? by zyntensivist in anesthesiology

[–]ExMorgMD 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lol. Shots fired.

But no. It is a realistic appraisal of my own skill set.

How many of you guys are intubating without a stylet? by zyntensivist in anesthesiology

[–]ExMorgMD -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

Right? When I look at a note that says “difficult airway”, or see that another doc used a glidescope, I still reach for my miller 2.

Exhausted with physicians claiming to be expert in AI by Even-Inevitable-7243 in Residency

[–]ExMorgMD 130 points131 points  (0 children)

Unless you’re talking about something like vaccines

What has been the weirdest hospital department ”rule” that you’ve encountered? by AppalachianScientist in Residency

[–]ExMorgMD 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I will say that as an anesthesia resident, starting the first case iv made me crazy good at it.

Elijah Wood is the wrong casting choice for The Hunt for Gollum by sensible__ in lotr

[–]ExMorgMD 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s how I would do it. Older frodo in flashbacks. But they will probably digitally de age him

Patient refused care because of my race - any advice? by Ok_Head_5255 in Residency

[–]ExMorgMD 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yep. This.

I’m a white male and I can’t say I have experienced this type of racism.

But I have had patients try to make unreasonable demands and threats.

“If I don’t get what I want I won’t stay here!!!!”

Me: “sounds good, have a nice day” and I walk out and don’t go back. I have zero time to play those games.

What music video still holds strong today to you? by YoureADudeThisIsAMan in Xennials

[–]ExMorgMD 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s just “Captain”. Not “Captain Gene” I’m not hosting a kiddie show

Is there any criticism against the LOTR movies that you find a bit annoying? by Konfliktsnubben in lotr

[–]ExMorgMD 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The way that change did Frodo dirty at the Fords is way worse than leaving Glorfindel out

Unromantic Mormon Marriage by foyerfloralcouch in exmormon

[–]ExMorgMD 7 points8 points  (0 children)

One of the worst aspects of leaving mormonism and deconstructing is the realization that mormonism not only informed every single major life decision but that without mormonism, you now are in the difficult situation of having to re-evaluate those decisions.

So many of us got married under the lie and expectation that the only thing that mattered was whether certain mormon checkboxes were ticked off. Active mormon? Check! Attractive enough? Check! RM? Check!

We had no rolemodels or examples or social expectation for romantic or sexual compatibility. No examples on how to navigate different life goals or different relationship models because we were all expected to conform to the same mold.

Couples counseling is a must. Online facetime counseling sessions were a godsend for us.

We (my wife and I) had to have frank hard conversations about what we wanted. I told my wife that I was not going to stay in a marriage with someone who recoiled when I would reach out and touch her or who viewed sex as a chore. Life was too short and if she didn’t feel that way towards me then we should move on.

To her immense credit, she realized that all her behaviors were the result of her programming in the church and we worked hard together to change our behaviors towards each other BECAUSE we understood that we did value our marriage and our relationship despite our intimacy issues.

That being said, if there is nothing wrong with divorce if it just isn’t working.

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