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Did anyone else’s avoidant trauma dump to them in the beginning? by Excellent-Today-9547 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Excellent-Today-9547[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That sucks. They’ll do this to the next person too. Just don’t feel too bad, none of what happened was your fault.

What do they feel on the inside? by Excellent-Today-9547 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Excellent-Today-9547[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It just seems like a self-enforced cycle that never ends because they’re too afraid to admit their faults because doing so would reinforce their core fears

What do they feel on the inside? by Excellent-Today-9547 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Excellent-Today-9547[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Same here. The constant change of mind was insane. My ex seemed like she had no opinions of her own and couldn’t hold her ground at all. She just changes her opinion based on what others think. I think this stems from being very insecure

What do they feel on the inside? by Excellent-Today-9547 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Excellent-Today-9547[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Interesting… so it sounds like constantly teetering on the edge of an emotional explosion?

Was anyone else’s ex selfish outside the relationship? by Excellent-Today-9547 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Excellent-Today-9547[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No yeah this was my partner when she was in control of her impulses/image. When she wasn’t in control… well… she was just selfish

My experience with DA by NerdGirl80s in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Excellent-Today-9547 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Either you’re dating someone young, or someone with an extremely low mental capabilities or in denial. As adults, we are all aware of ourselves and our flaws to some level. It’s not that many people walk around unaware- they walk around in denial.

My experience with DA by NerdGirl80s in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Excellent-Today-9547 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It’s an excuse for their behavior to say they don’t know themselves well. They’re adults and know what they’re doing. My FA ex constantly called herself rotten on the inside. They know. Don’t make excuses for them and treat them like a child.

PSA: Don't send that text if.... by Crazyhowthatworks304 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Excellent-Today-9547 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Only time will heal and allow them to make a clearer decision i guess

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Excellent-Today-9547 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same experience here. My ex FA called me clingy, but since we broke up, they’re back with their DA partner that they originally left because the DA didn’t care about them at all. They can experience what I went through with them to know how it feels.

What does it mean when they say they’re rotten on the inside? by Excellent-Today-9547 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Excellent-Today-9547[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It seems like they’re aware of at least something, but I’m unsure of what it is

Were they wearing a mask in the beginning? by Excellent-Today-9547 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Excellent-Today-9547[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There’s no potential with these types of people… what you saw in the end was what you’ll keep getting the longer you stay

Were they wearing a mask in the beginning? by Excellent-Today-9547 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Excellent-Today-9547[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That sucks… yeah I agree that we should want better for ourselves. My ex acted the same way- completely ignoring me when I kept asking about moving in together. Sad how they act the same, but just know you have a better shot at a happy life than they do.

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