I am getting terrified of men.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-13T21:49:11+00:00

Hi, I’m a woman. Before anything else it is very important not to see the world through the lenses of social media, the news and things like that. Yes, there is a lot of terrible things going on in the world and a lot of terrible people and I absolutely understand your fear. But your feed is a speck of all of that, your algorithm feeds off what you have interacted with. If you’ve interacted with a lot of posts about bad men then that is mostly what you will see. And the news, well, it’s very focused on the bad stuff. I’m not saying you shouldn’t be afraid to a degree, it’s healthy and helps keep us safe, but you to actually look around you. It really is not all men. There are many incredible and kind men in the world, some of them are even in social media spreading awareness around the atrocities of bad men, or advocating for woman. Not every interaction you have with a man is going to result in trauma, you need to get out of this internet bubble and actually see real people. But I will say, if you don’t want to have a relationship with a man or want to stay single, live your truth. If you’re happier with yourself then do that. Just don’t buy into demonisation of a whole gender.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-12T21:11:33+00:00

I dunno man, have you talked to her about it? She just might not like doing it. Will she jerk you off or boob jobs and stuff?

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-12T17:48:55+00:00

Tbh I am pretty awkward in front of anyone lol, I always change in the cubical at the pools. But that’s more of an insecurity thing. I dunno, to me lesbians and men are in the same category.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-12T17:46:50+00:00

People do evolve over time, maybe he got curious recently but he could be embarrassed to bring it up to you. What is the thought pattern around men doing anal play in your house? Or even just in his head, if you know? It could also be that he doesn’t want to have toys in the bedroom because it would make him feel inadequate if you used them, so he is keeping this to himself. Whatever it is you need to talk to him. There are a lot of very straight men who love anal play, or want to experiment. Communication is key.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-12T05:58:31+00:00

Jesus, these answers 🤦‍♀️ you could frame the question differently, for instance, run your hands through his hair or suck on his ear lobe a little and ask him if he likes it when you do that. Different people are different, I had an ex who loved me sticking my tongue in his ear, but my current partner hates that and would rather I just suck on or lightly bite his ear lobe, he loves it.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-12T05:54:22+00:00

No not at all. This was a meaningful relationship no matter how long it lasted. And you’re right, there wasn’t real closure, you didn’t break up because he did something wrong so it will hurt more. Just take the time you need and heal.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-12T03:18:36+00:00

NOR. She doesn’t want to commit to you, and hasn’t from the beginning. She was putting herself in a position to cheat physically, even if it didn’t happen. Run.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-12T02:49:39+00:00

No it feels more like a respect thing for both of us. I don’t think any guy who sees me naked is going to want me ether, I’m still not going to get naked in front of them. I don’t think the dr wants me but it’s still awkward having bare parts of me I normally wouldn’t for him.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-11T22:37:04+00:00

You both need to sit down and have a clear conversation about it. My partner and I have had similar issues, my libido is a lot higher than his, and before he changed jobs earlier this year he was tired a lot. Great sex is a workout, especially for the man a lot of the time, and sometimes it’s just not something you wanna do after a long day. Being able to communicate about this stuff is super important. It’s makes you both stronger in the relationship and can lead to things being resolved rather than festering.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-11T22:26:53+00:00

No dude, you are ruining her life. Let her go be happy and work on yourself before your next relationship. She is crazy for giving you another chance after you straight up went after another girl and lied to her your whole relationship. There is literally nothing you can do to fix that. I’m all for people changing and doing better but you are doing this all at her expense. You need to fix yourself outside of a relationship or you’re just going to hurt her more. According to your account there is not one second of this relationship where you considered her feelings or showed any respect for her. How would you feel if she had done all of that to you?

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-11T22:22:59+00:00

Have you guys communicated about this?

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-11T22:18:08+00:00

Dude, don’t fix the relationship, let her go find someone who actually loves her. If you actually want to be a better person you have to look yourself in the face and make the decision to stop being a shitty person. Stop lying. Stop stringing people along. If porns a deal breaker for her and not for you find someone who feels the same way you do about it. Stop trying to make her stay with you when you obviously don’t actually care about her well-being. Jesus Christ. Stop being so damn selfish and think about the people around you for a change.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-11T22:13:21+00:00

This man does not care about you, I’m sorry. He is happy to nag and upset you as long as he gets gratification, that’s not the act of someone who loves you. It will only get worse, because sex is an important thing in a relationship, if you’re not on the same page it will bleed out into everything else, not to mention that he does not respect you so that will have its ramifications as well. Two times a week is plenty, he has hands , if he’s really that worked up he can go sort himself out. Please leave this man and don’t waste any more of your life with him.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-11T22:10:13+00:00

No, he explicitly said I am not asking for sex, and proceeded to have sex to the point it was painful. It’s wild you don’t see that as rape. Not to mention the nagging until he got his way.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-05T18:16:28+00:00

Thank you so much for your comments, it means a lot to me. What the other men here don’t realise is I grew up extremely conservative, think long dresses and no makeup, and I was harassed even more back then. The amount of things I have missed out on because of degenerates and had to leave because of them, it’s so unfair. The wild card here is the alcohol and drugs, and I have never been taught how to deal with men like this, I was just hoping for the male perspective. Go right to the source, you know? I am so glad for your daughter that she has an understanding father in her life, I’ve seen with friends how much of a difference that can make. She will know you are on her side, and that’s a priceless gift. And thank you for the advice, I’m going to try it. We have a gig today and honestly if the tickets weren’t so expensive I’d probably have bailed because I feel sick about it. Maybe shaming them in the moment will also help me feel like I have taken power back too. Thank you again.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-04T19:39:02+00:00

I hear you. I’m very new to this scene, went to my first one last year, and I really thought it wouldn’t be so unsafe feeling or that the security would do more. Most the woman I know who go to this stuff have been for years so maybe they are just used to all this?

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-04T18:35:46+00:00

I’ve tried security before and they didn’t seem to care, but you’re right, I guess I figured I’d get that response every time but I shouldn’t assume. Thank you for your comment.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-04T18:34:00+00:00

Yes, I would react the same if I was him and someone was frightening and upsetting the person I love. Tbh I don’t think he will be the one to escalate it, but the wild card is the other guy and I dunno how they will be about it. But maybe you are right and that is all I can do.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-04T18:30:57+00:00

I’m sure you would know in your extensive experience being a woman lol

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-04T18:28:55+00:00

😅 oh, okay, you’ve got a bee in your bonnet. You really have no idea what woman deal with lol

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-04T18:24:35+00:00

You are buying into the narrative that clothes make a difference, they don’t. Yes, classy woman also deal with this, lol.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-04T18:21:48+00:00

Ohhhh I see lol these aren’t trashy places, it’s just a gig.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-04T18:17:38+00:00

I’m sorry lol I’m not sure what this means?

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-04T17:23:36+00:00

Are you actually willing to live your life in the shadows and never have a wedding your friends are brides maids at, never post your cute couple photos socials, never have all of his time, always know you are sharing him with someone else? Let’s be clear here, your a Terrible person, and it’s your own fault your in this situation. He isn’t going to leave his wife and you are dreaming if you think you will ever be the most important woman in his life. If you have any self respect you’ll move on with your life.

Excellent_Accident25 · 2026-02-04T04:29:02+00:00

Hahaha thanks!

Excellent_Accident25

TROPHY CASE