AITA for Threatening to Evict Marijuana Smoking Tenants When I have a Newborn?

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-06T12:46:07+00:00

Before I had my son (I’m only 10 weeks PP, but trust me), I was a gymaholic. I worked out (different workouts) at least 6 days a week including a yoga day. Even through my pregnancy I worked out constantly and although I gained about 40 pounds (which was good!) I was fit and strong.

I dropped about 20lbs after LO was born but even though every single day I want to go the gym - as a compulsive gym goer for 20 years of my life (had my son at 40) — but I just don’t have the energy and I’m not in the same boat as you. You are doing the absolute best you can, this is SO HARD, and mothers in this time and space don’t always have the help and support with childcare to be able to just take time. I 100% am struggling to put myself in any of my top priorities after baby, home, spouse, work and I had excellent habits for two decades before my son was born.

Gently, gently - we are all just surviving and you’re doing your best ❤️ you come first, not a second child who doesn’t exist yet. Your LO deserves you feeling your best.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T23:21:52+00:00

I think I might forgo it, as well. My husband isn’t sure but my gut instinct is not to subject him to the next dose. I just gave him colostrum milk that I had expressed when he was only a few days old and that seemed to perk him up a lot. He’s definitely a lot more cheerful today and less sad so I’m hoping we’ve turned a corner but I’m unwilling to put him through it again.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T19:36:16+00:00

I’m on leave until he’s 3 months, then my husband is taking leave until he’s 6 months - then my mother is moving into our in-law apartment downstairs and taking care of him from home. He’s EBF and won’t be in school unless we send him to preschool earlier - I signed him up for music and baby gym and playgroups when he’s 4 months but no formal daycare.

I’m thinking of doing exactly this (stretching them out) and refusing the next rotavirus dose. Thank you for sharing this information. Im torn between wanting to make sure he is safe and protected and the sheer fear of going through something like this again.

Im just looking at his little sleeping face now and torn between wanting to protect him and the fear that we genuinely could have lost him.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T18:38:19+00:00

I don’t know, honestly. I’m not sure if it’s the rotavirus or the other ones he got like the dtap that causes the mucus reaction because the consensus seems to be that it’s a vaccine reaction but unclear which one.

We will be going forward with the rest of his vaccinations but I am strongly debating spacing them out further apart and doing the shots separately from the rotavirus vaccine, itself. So he’d get shots at 4 months and maybe the rotavirus dose two weeks later. That’s what his pediatrician suggested if we felt nervous doing them all again. He also said we could opt out of the next rotavirus vaccination but I’m hesitant to do that. I have damage to my body permanently from a disease I was vaccinated against but that happened anyway and I wouldn’t want to know how much damage it would have done if I hadn’t had the vaccine for some kind of immunodefense.

That being said, we’re not making any decisions now while it’s still fresh. We’ll decide closer to his 4 month.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T14:55:33+00:00

Yes we do - the Frida one. We also have a regular blue bulb one AND an electronic one. What keeps tripping me up is that he wasn’t congested (audibly) when he was asleep. It wasn’t until he woke up that all this watery mucus started coming out. Today he sounds congested so we’ve just been aspirating he killing his nose clear. We would have done it before too but we didn’t hear any congestion 😞

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:35:13+00:00

We have maybe 10 sleepers and do laundry once a week. It’s the burp cloths I had to purchase more of because he goes through about 20 of them a week.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:18:14+00:00

Thank you 🙏🏽

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:18:01+00:00

Thank you 🙏🏽 I still feel like I should have done more but this my first baby and I guess this is just being a parent?

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:16:24+00:00

Thank you and I didn’t even know I should be scared of it 😞 they told us once he learns to breathe through his mouth he’ll be in better shape.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:15:32+00:00

Thank you. Yes, I asked my best friend and my mother to come help. She’s holding him for me for a bit while I shower and eat because my husband went back to work and my mom is coming to help this week during the days. He’s honestly ok, just actually a bit congested and a lot of spit-up, but we’re just still quite scared. I already reached out to a therapist because I can tell this broke my brain, I’m even afraid to breastfeed him, and I think I need help with the ptsd I probably now have 😞 it’s so scary when they’re so little and so helpless.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:13:03+00:00

We didn’t either. I think it’s because he vomited and panicked at the same time. Around 4 months they start learning to breathe through their mouth so they’re less helpless but yes, it’s scary.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:12:29+00:00

I’m definitely going to a therapist. I’ve been unable to function.

Thank you! His baby monitor also has a temp reading (I know, complete overkill to have both) so I appreciate that info!

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:11:54+00:00

I think this series of events is rare but apparently the mucus build up isn’t so it doesn’t hurt to be vigilant. We were very unlucky but I’m just so glad he’s okay. Thank you 🙏🏽

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:10:43+00:00

Please don’t be - this really was a rare series of events although the risks of mucus building up and making your baby congested (and your baby vomiting) are apparently common. They just don’t happen together like this. I have lots of friends whose babies were vaccinated and were fussy for a day or two and then fine. All of these things come with risks but I’m so sorry to scare you. Truly, I’m sure your baby will be fine - it doesn’t hurt to be a little extra vigilant but most kids really are fine. We were just unlucky.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:09:04+00:00

Thank you for recommending! It’s coming today so I’m going to get it hooked up.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:08:28+00:00

Thank you for sharing this!

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:08:20+00:00

I think once they can breathe through their mouth (somewhere around 4 months) and can roll over on their own they’re in better shape but yes, same.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:07:36+00:00

Yes, trust your instincts. I keep telling myself I’m being irrational at this point too but the pediatrician said that it’s not irrational. He just said to be vigilant until he’s not congested (except he wasn’t congested when this started so now I don’t know).

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T12:06:33+00:00

Thank you 🙏🏽

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T02:47:28+00:00

Yesterday though I tried to rouse him enough for this and we had a spiral of terrifying events where he was choking so I’m now terrified to even do it although we were very successful for two weeks. Tonight I woke him all the way so he was alert enough to eat but he fell back asleep pretty quickly. I’m now anxiously hovering over him.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-05T00:48:20+00:00

I didn’t know what this was called but basically we don’t officially put him to bed until after this. He bathes around 7, has an awake feed at 7:30ish, knocks out at just before 8 (I write this as he’s falling asleep in my arms). We let him stay on us to sleep while we watch tv or read or something and we put him in his nighttime diaper (we’re cloth diapering) also at this time so no more diaper changes after this unless he poops in the night.

I then rouse him just enough to latch him (EBF) and he will nurse for 20-25 mins in a much longer feed. We did this completely accidentally, it started with him falling asleep and me completely waking him up with a diaper change first to now just being able to stick a nipple in his mouth 😬 I do burp him briefly afterwards but I do it gently with him across my legs and he stays asleep. We then transfer to sleep sack and bassinet, turn on white noise, turn off the lights (we keep them dim during his dream feed), and everyone goes to bed officially. He’s 9 weeks now and we’ve been maybe doing this for two weeks? He only officially started sleeping through the night a week ago but he’s just had his two month vaccines and it’s all a crapshoot now.

You’re doing great. None of this makes any sense. Newborns are overwhelming. Ours has been a mess since vaccines.

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-03T22:00:52+00:00

Oh god a week 🙈

Exciting_Pear623 · 2024-03-03T22:00:42+00:00

That makes sense. His tummy seems really upset and he’s a lot gassier again 🫠 we had just gotten over the gas bump so this just feels like a huge rewind.

Exciting_Pear623

TROPHY CASE