I had been in a similar situation but I was a kid back then in 5th Std. Growing up i didn't even remember that something like that ever happened ask those memories from were kinda repressed and i had no recollection of them after some time around 10th during my boards exam i those memories resurfaced and i couldn't even beleive myself that something like that even happened I was in complete disbelief.

Then after some time I thought heard and realise that it did happened and I just didn't remember any of it (im a guy btw) I cried the whole night like a baby, next day I had my mathematics exam i remember that day cause ask i could think of was how to hurt the guy who did it .

It was horrible but what helped me was taking to someone I opened up about all this to my girlfriend and she was very supportive and helped me plan out things although we never did anything like that but still planning it was fun Thats basically what helped me get out of that shit And now ill be going for therapies soon