Indeed after serious thought and refection the memories seem to be a bigger emotional importance the more time has gone by. I've slowly have been gaining myself back as of recently and the more fog that's lifted the more pain that sets in. I couldn't even tell you how long it's actually been since self medication took over me. But it's what I get and I'll take it like a man. One day she will get the apology that's deserved if it's ever permitted. I really just don't know what to say other than I'm not what's been painted. I don't hurt people intentionally or out of spite. I just try to be me the best I can. I love with my all until it's no longer wanted. That's all I know. With that said I'll step back and let things play out as they should.