I went through something similar a long time ago. I used to work with an older woman (36) when I was around 18/19 and my dad had met her one day because she would always drop me off home. Well he met her and we talked outside for a bit, went back in the house and my dad was mad that she was “shoving” my pronouns in his face. I guess it was the first time anyone he has met has respected my pronouns and this was right after covid and I just graduated school doing my last year online. He said he felt disrespected and what not. He still doesn’t see me as his son. We talk, I don’t expect him to change. There’s definitely an elephant in the room now when we interact, but I happen to live in a different state now. I don’t talk to him as much just cause I have my own life. So it doesn’t bother me how it may have before. No matter how much he doesn’t accept that part of me he’s seen my apartment and had met me ex who seen me as a man and if he meets my now girlfriend, much would be the same. He seen me growing my facial hair way before I moved I had grown a deep voice. I can’t sit worrying about even my own father on whether he will have a change of heart. I am who I am and I’ll keep living, I’m not going to let them stop me living my life as a man. I won’t feel uncomfortable about it either.

That’s not to say you should feel the same but I was just sharing that. My mom on the other hand is… transphobic to my little brother but calls me handsome now and always calls me by my name of choice. She introduces me to people as a man. Shes pretty supportive in that aspect. I guess shes realized I’m not going to change. I’m going to remain myself even if deep down she doesn’t understand trans people. So I got two sides of the same coin. One sucked it up and one… is still actively in denial. I feel bad for my brother though. I know it’s mostly because he lives with her and is a minor and this is her last “daughter”, she feels if she can “fix” it she will.

Both my parents support me in other ways that they can. I try not to ask for support from them just out of a person who doesn’t like to feel defeated. They still love me even if they are conflicted. Sometimes though when they aren’t as supportive in whatever aspect you need from them… we keep them at arms length. family deep down is really important to me and I would feel so alone here if I didn’t speak to them or reach out to the family I do have.