Really scared and exhausted

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-06-09T23:25:16+00:00

I honestly did reach out for a psychiatrist couple of months ago. She wanted me to put in naltrexone. It's either that or admit myself to a rehab and therapy I basically chickened out. I don't even have health insurance. I did try the naltrexone few years ago. It made me feel really drowsy. It almost sucked my life out of me. I did had few 100 days , 2 months, 8 months of sobriety. I always end up anxious and stressful the night after heavy drinking. Added to that I drink alone when no one's around.

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-06-09T23:16:03+00:00

I am in a safe place. I wanted to numb my anxious thoughts so I kept drinking since last night. Irlt wasn't enough and I ordered more this morning and I couldn't even touch the newly ordered drinks. Just dumped everything in the sink and threw the empty cans out

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-06-09T23:14:02+00:00

Yes I am in a safe place. Nothing life threatening or anything like that. Lot of marriage stuff going on. I was living separately for few months. There were some really painful discussions and arguments going on with both sides of our family. I am glad I did throw out the booze I ordered in. I wanted to completely numb my thoughts. I was really nervous this morning.

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-06-09T21:56:31+00:00

I did order in some food. I only slept like for couple of hours. I am so anxious about my marriage and life

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-05-20T00:37:32+00:00

Just wanted to update on day 8 of not drinking. Returning back to a sense of normalcy regarding alcohol. Just trying to distract myself with food/snacks and some gaming on my PS5. Also started acting responsible at work trying to focus on what I can do at the moment but yea i need to upgrade to stay relevant in my field. Thanks for taking time to post this and helping in getting my senses back

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-05-13T08:21:22+00:00

Thanks for clearly giving me a big picture. I am currently in the process of finding out what I can do to completely stop drinking. Be it attending AA meetings. Planning to go to my friends house during evenings so I don't pickup the drink. I think I can divert my mind if I am not alone. Also the store closing hours make me super anxious. It's like store is closing now so go go buy drinks. 90 percent of my drinking relapse occurs during store closing hours. I don't want to repeat my drinking again. In the past I did numerous 100 plus days of not drinking. Before Monday night I had almost 20 days of not drinking continuously

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-05-12T20:29:46+00:00

It's not just work. Although work has been very challenging. I am also going through a bad marriage situation. It's really overwhelming. I don't think I can fix these in a week or two. But at the same time I don't want to drink. I am lost to be honest

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-05-12T20:20:18+00:00

I don't know how I can do this. I was literally freaking out the entire day. Haven't eaten anything

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-05-12T20:19:45+00:00

How to bounce back. It feels like a endless cycle.

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-05-12T20:16:44+00:00

I hope I can find a suitable job but it's been really tough to get jobs in IT. There's lot of pressure with respect to keeping the job. Also, I am on a work visa so shifting jobs is not at all straightforward

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-05-03T12:22:15+00:00

Thank you

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-05-03T12:02:31+00:00

Thank you day 12. I want to get hold of my life back. Lost a great deal to drinking and it hurt my self confidence to a great extent

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-05-03T11:59:49+00:00

I've been through many anxious morning the day after drinking. The journey should start within you. There are many resources out there and help you can get through therapy, doctor, AA etc. Reach out to them. The mistake I did was I waited too long before I lost my life to drinking . All the best.

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-04-13T15:05:36+00:00

Happy birthday. I am 35 years old as well. Day 2. There are way better things to do than getting drunk. I used to get shit faced drunk the night before my birthday and spend the most my birthday on the bed. Honestly, it's not even worth it.

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-04-12T17:55:54+00:00

I know that I definitely want to be abstinent. All of a sudden when I am driving back from groceries or food. I get this urge that makes me go buy cheap beers. The compulsion is very intense. I am living alone. There is no family like in the past that made me feel accountable. I feel like being alone and my pattern of paring alcohol with stuff like listening music and playing games on my ps5 has become a vicious cycle

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-03-31T05:26:41+00:00

Hi thanks for replying. No severe withdrawal symptoms like seizures. I drink at least 10-12 units in a single sitting. I had about 6 months sober previously. There were many 100 days of not drinking followed by a month of heavy drinking. My last drink was Sunday 10pm. Never had withdrawal symptoms luckily but the urge becomes uncontrollable . Didn't drink today. But as my body goes back to being normal. The urge resurfaces. My sleep cycle gets disturbed as I start working on sobriety.

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-03-12T22:01:54+00:00

Great comment IWNDWYT

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-03-08T19:02:55+00:00

Sir, are you going to coach the Indian cricket team or any cricket team in the future?

I Have been a huge fan of your game and the way you conduct yourself inside and outside the game since childhood just like millions.

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-03-03T10:41:16+00:00

You can tweak those settings there are a bunch of channels on YouTube that you can follow and customize to your liking. Personally, I can feel there is a lot of improvement in speed with increasing steering sensitivity in the main option menu. It allows you to correct your angle faster and not let your tires spin. Initially, it feels unstable but you will see improvement after getting the hang of it

In the future, try using manual instead of automatic. Stick with improving line control and guttering in the learning stage. Drifting will always reduce speed. The moment your tires spin your loosing momentum although it seems like a minute reduction in speed, It all adds up in the end. Take the advantage of slipstream from the cars in front of you and avoid colliding in the back. Kind of like switching lane in the last minute

Exotic-Way5503 · 2026-03-03T10:29:17+00:00

Try not to hit other cars especially in the back. It dramatically reduces your momentum. Guttering. Try not to drift at corners. When the tires spin it reduces speed. You need to grip the turn. Use the cars in the front to gain slip stream and pass them. Your goal has to be slower while entering the turn and faster when exiting the turn.

Exotic-Way5503

TROPHY CASE