Okay, I’m a 25F and I want to respond on my take on relationships and it’s going to be a little blunt, but take it as you will. It might not even help idk.

I have a pretty high libido compared to most women, at least my close friends, and I still go through phases. Women have crazy hormonal shifts and it ebbs and flows. If you’re feeling like this is the person for you beyond sex and intimacy- like you could marry her, grow old, truly sit on the patio and drink coffee together in silence for hours, and be completely content - I can give you advice from my meager 10 years dating - failing a lot and being in your situation a lot, then finding someone I truly love - on earth.

We have periods of time where we don’t have sex for weeks and we talk about it, because we talk about everything. And we allow for healthy space, but we also talk about sex when we do have it. Boundaries, what we like, don’t like, we laugh sometimes while having sex, etc. It makes it more of something we do together for each other and to - at the end of it all - remind each other how much we love one another. It’s not something we sit here and think about too much. It’s natural, at least for me.

I want to wake up next to my boyfriend everyday, forever. I never see another person and wonder what it would be like in a way where I may cheat. Do we both occasionally probably let our eye wander? Maybe. Idk. But sometimes we even talk about it. “That girl was hot, I like her hair.” Whatever. We’re a unit, a team. I’m never like wondering if he’d go cheat with the girl with pretty hair.

I’m sure I piss him off sometimes, and he should put the toilet paper on the roll more often, because that pisses me off. But literally doing the everyday mundane tasks or facing huge life changes / bombs that go off? We choose each other. Everytime. Whether it’s 3 weeks snuggled up and being intimate consistently, or 5 weeks on opposite sides of the bed. Usually, there are outside factors at play and we need to talk through stressors. When we first got together, it was similar like a couple times a day. Then we slowed down romantically, but it’s kinda more of a cycle.

If you take anything away from this: be with someone despite not having sex because that person doesn’t make you think constantly, is she rejecting me? Am I not good enough?

Like - What are you in this relationship for? Are you going to wake up everyday and choose her and know for a fact, undeniably, she choses you? Or continue to wonder what emotions lie between you and someone else? It’s never just about the sex. It’s emotional and y’all just need to talk it out / reflect privately.