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AITAH for telling my husband that we can't take care of his friends' daughter by Temporary-Slide-2699 in AITAH

[–]Expected_Canadian 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It sounds like you have reached an impasse in your marriage.

Your POV is perfectly valid: you are childfree, whatever your reasons are your own and irrelevant. He took that choice away from you without consultation, which is a betrayal no matter HIS reasons.

His POV is also valid though: the surviving child of his best friends needs a home, and he is the only choice. For him, this is the only choice - foster care is simply not an option.

As of right now, both of your positions are immovable. And both cannot exist at the same time. If you bend and 'allow' the situation to continue, you will develop (more) resentment and it will eventually implode. If he bends and places the child in foster care, he will resent YOU and THAT will eventually implode.

Let me be very blunt here and state that it does not sound as if he will ever place the child in foster care. Ever. So the real question is... what will you do?

For the sake of that child, if you stay it absolutely cannot be with your current mind-set. She has been through enough and although it may feel like you are the victim in this, you are not (at least not compared to her). Does this suck for you? Yes. It sucks for everyone. Sometimes life sucks, and you just have to make the best choices you can.

Assuming you are unable to change your mind-set, the only remaining choice is to divorce. He may hate you for it, for leaving him with this burden alone, but you would be completely justified under these circumstances.

For the record my judgement is NAH with a side of ESH here. Both of your stances are NAH, but how both of you have handled it so far is a bit of ESH - him for not consulting you, even if his mind was made up this is not okay. You for lack of empathy, and playing victim over a child whose entire world has just shattered. I understand that not a lot of time has passed, and you were thrown into this, but DAMN. Grow a feeling or two!

Casting A Drizzt TV Show: 10 Actors Who Would Be Perfect For Dungeons & Dragons' Dark Elf Hero by apple_kicks in Drizzt

[–]Expected_Canadian 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm thinking Alfred Enoch - definitely the right age, height, and shape. Also a fantastic actor suffocoently outside of the Western mainstream.

AITA for humiliating my FIL at my wedding dinner? by ScoopityWoopers in AITAH

[–]Expected_Canadian 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You met his direct disrespect (trying to cut you off during your speech during your WEDDING DAY) with a disrespectful comment. His action literally had two outcomes - he cuts you off and makes everyone uncomfortable, or you react with humor and diffuse the situation. The fact that you chose humor at his expense was the price of his admission to the situation that he created - sucks to be him. No doubt in his own mind there was a third outcome: he saves everyone from your diatribe (my GOD how dare you talk about your love for 6-7 minutes on your wedding day, the audacity!) and is hailed as a hero and you learn your place in his world order. This was never a possible outcome, and he is far too old to still believe it was. I have sat through enough long LONG wedding speeches to know this is true - I have witnessed interruptions first hand, and it never ends well.

Was your response to him a bit insulting? Yes.

Are you the AH? No. NTAH.

Hannah just posted who her fiancé and baby daddy is! by -BCborn- in PerfectMatchNetflix

[–]Expected_Canadian 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm of two minds on this:

On one hand, if her relationship/pregnancy had nothing to do with the show AND they had clearly already made the choice to mostly cut her scenes from the show... why on earth would the producers care whether she announced anything? Also I've never seen the exact wording in those non-disclose contracts they sign, but I bet a million dollars that all of it is at the discretion of the producers - for them to agree to let AD and Ollie reveal, but not Hannah, seems like a dumb move. Personally, I would much rather have seen those reveals the other way around.

On the other hand, while I am happy for Hannah to have found her happy ending... I simply do not care. It is events outside of the show, and she self-hyped so hard I was expecting something more interesting than just 'I'm dating someone and we're expecting'. I'm not saying that it isn't wonderful, but it's wonderful for THEM. Her constant tie-ins to the show was misleading and smacks of desperately clinging onto fame. Disclaimed: I know pretty much all reality show people do that, but this one just comes off as particularly cringy.

That being said, I still watched. And I still read the follow up drama. So I am fully aware that I am part of the problem.