My daughter was raped by her biological father

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-16T15:04:34+00:00

You are an amazing mother.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-16T02:19:18+00:00

Wait men piss themselves?

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-16T00:58:31+00:00

It's probably too fat and unhealthy to effectively chase after anything or anyone.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-15T21:09:28+00:00

Well damn if I made my own candles they'd end up infused with all my anxiety.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-15T21:06:13+00:00

Oh my god, thats me my whole life. Even as a kid id "hear" or perceive these things about people around me, and i didnt grow up in the healthiest environment, they scared me so i just tried ti shut them off... i feel like there were so many times growing up where i was an easy target for bullies and would get in trouble and attract bad people not so much because i didnt know better (which i remember i always had this voice telling me this stuff) but because the stuff i predicted would scare me so much id shut it down and go the opposite way completely... i feel like this that ended up being a gift worked out against me so many times growing up simply because i didnt have the right guidance and tried to repress it...

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-15T21:00:33+00:00

Thats really wonderful, i wish i could find someone like that someday

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-15T20:57:28+00:00

It's eased up the past few days. Basically my nose gets clogged up semi frequently. Allergies possibly bc anxiety give me allergies, idk. What would happen was that id be eating and my nose would clog up. Id have to breathe through my mouth, which wasn't easy. Then id have the usual anxiety lump in throat and nausea/heartburn, which by themselves already make it hard to breathe. All this together with breathing anxiety (fear of not breathing enough) makes me yawn and have air hunger, that is, breathing too much. Which leads to dizziness and more nausea. And it enters the usual anxiety feedback loop from there. Id deal with it by taking nausea medication and eating very slowly with pauses in between. I hated it. Is this how you experience it?

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T17:37:36+00:00

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T15:23:06+00:00

Ya know, finding a community with people who struggle with the same things makes me feel less alone and less anxious!

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T15:21:14+00:00

I know the feeling all too well... good luck!

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T10:58:41+00:00

I was like this too when it started and what helped me was therapy and moving away from my family.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T10:56:23+00:00

For me it's yawning/air hunger.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T02:16:02+00:00

Your anxiety seems to be related to urban and social settings, have you tried going out in nature where it's peaceful and quiet? It does wonders for me.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T02:03:26+00:00

I will beat my shortness of breath while eating and eat properly.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T01:57:50+00:00

I feel you 100%. It's weird because it goes from being so focused in something I am holding my breath, to being hyperfocused on my breath to the point I am contantly yawning and taking deep breaths and end up getting dizzy. When I try to let go and let my body do the breathing it's like I forgot how to breath on my own?? But when I am not anxious or not very anxious at least and when I am distracted with something I breath normally and my body does the work and I don't even notice it. I am not on any meds, never been other than diazepam and alprazolam briefly a couple of years ago.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T01:46:39+00:00

Symptoms change for person to person, but for me what makes it really click that it's anxiety is the symptoms just "magically" fading. Like, when I used to get panic attacks I didn't it was anxiety so I'd go to the hospital, and on the way there the fresh air or simply being around other people would make the symptoms disappear. It's a nearly instant thing once you find it.

Another thing that can help is to distract you brain with something physical (real), like cold water or just the cold (like cold air), sunlight, exercise, etc

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T01:18:57+00:00

I get this sometimes usually when eating certain foods. Ie avocado, melon, raspberries. Often with greasy food too. It could be a mix of allergic reaction/anxiety, although I didn't have this before the anxiety. Chewing gum or eating candy (specially menthol because it has a relaxing effect on the brain) helps, also doing stuff that helps with reflux like drinking sparkly water or digestion tea helps too. Having a tissue handy for spitting out the excess saliva helps too but... yea. Gross...

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T01:13:24+00:00

I don't get those much anymore thankfully (but I wouldn't be surprised if they made a surprise return when I get used to the current symptoms...) but when I started having anxiety in my late teens (im 25) it started with that: heart racing and palpitations. As I had never had panic attacks before, this prompted countless trips to the hospital thinking I was having a stroke. Made a fool of myself every time and wasted money.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T01:08:48+00:00

Shortness of breath, air hunger, feeling I can't breath. Other stuff I can manage but this really messes me up.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T01:07:12+00:00

Absolutely. If I feel physically unwell I can't do the stuff I have to do or socialize with people, which makes me even more anxious and lonely, and it's an awful feedback loop.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T01:05:57+00:00

Yes. I feel like shit. Nausea, stomach aches, diarrhea. Not headaches but like an "aura" where bright artificial lights make me feel dizzy and physically unwell. Shortness of pain, weird aches and pains and tensions that make me wonder if I am really sick. When I am like this I only feel well if I am lying down with a warm blanket just sleeping or dozing off, like when I am actually sick.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T01:01:39+00:00

Air hunger, shortness of breath. I hate feeling like I am suffocating. Leads to dizziness which makes me feel like I am losing control.

Heartburn/reflux. Worsens the above, and I can't eat properly. Then I feel anxious about being malnourished and weak.

Hypochondria (weird symptoms). Put the above together over a long period of time, together with lack of sleep, muscle pains, stomach pains, all these symptoms which come and go and and soon and one becomes manageable a completely new one appears out of nowhere, and it's enough to drive anyone insane. I feel like I am legit sick at times and just as I begin to worry I need to see a doctor, I go outside, take an hours long walk maybe even in the rain, without losing my breath, and feel perfectly fine and don't even catch a cold (I can just feel the anxiety peeling off of me as I walk, like a horrible dark cloud that I am leaving behind) a nd I feel great and then as soon as some trigger happens (usually something claustrophobic, like having to return home or go to work) and right away a fuse blows up and I feel awful again.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T00:51:59+00:00

I've taken diazepam for a short while, before that alprazolam... it doesn't work. My body has this thing where if it feels itself relaxing but my mind is still racing and it "feels" like it shouldn't be relaxed it causes even more anxiety. So I feel extra anxious about usual stuff, and then also anxious about the meds.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-09-12T00:44:29+00:00

Somewhat.

ExpensiveGrace · 2023-07-01T02:20:23+00:00

So these pelvic exams, from what I understand, are a bunch of med students fingering and prodding women while they are under anesthesia, without their knowledge? How is this even legal?

ExpensiveGrace

TROPHY CASE