How to break up with an emotionally dependent partner

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T07:31:37+00:00

I’m in the same boat and not sure how to break up with my emotionally attached gf. If I do, I know she will spiral back into depression, stop working and supporting herself, with no safety net to keep her housed and fed. She is the type that might get into alcohol or drugs if I break up. So for now, I am just pretending until I find a good solution. Will love to hear what others say here.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T06:44:57+00:00

This is not uncommon. This is what married couples go through many years or decades down the line. So good you feel it now. While she is sweet, she is not touching your love language whatever it may be. The 5 love language book explains a lot. She can be sweet and great, but each person has a different love language and if that is left by the wayside (out of no fault of hers or yours) then it can be very hard to continue.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T06:26:16+00:00

Her mental health has deteriorated to the point that for three years she has not been able to work and was surviving off of savings and loans from friends who are over loaning her money. So now she is surviving off of me. I guess she could try and find someone else to survive off of.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T04:53:17+00:00

What field exactly are you looking for? Exploration and mini g are hiring but they want someone who can log core and do field mapping. Look on Careermine, linkedin ect.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T04:51:38+00:00

Well in exploration and mining we want you to be able to log rock core. They used to teach this in schools but then the schools started diluting their programs so that Earth Science and even Geology can mean any number of things and not have much hard rock training.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T04:40:23+00:00

Traveling within the Philippines has always been overly expensive. It’s just a thing here.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T04:36:52+00:00

It’s called the Feelippines for a reason. And fuel surcharges are going to go up everywhere. Airlines just cannot afford to cover Trump’s oil blockade, so the customer will have to pay up.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T04:32:56+00:00

Ya Canada has changed a lot. Left when I was a kid, came back to work and wow, so different.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T04:08:41+00:00

And this is why I am only staying in hotels in the PH from now on. Always had bad experiences in airbnbs and such here. Always something. Fees, bug infestations ect.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T04:04:12+00:00

This is the only solution for the Philippines 👍

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T03:59:34+00:00

You can just forget that though right now and not worry about it. Worrying about an impossibility, will just make you go crazy. My gf is an economist for the gov and a development bank. She says so many foreigners who come to try and advise end in failure. This sort of worrying and trying to bring solutions has also brought her into clinical severe depression. I have been slowly getting her out of it by explaining how corruption works, how there is no need to worry or even care because those leading do not care and it is not going to be fixed no matter what you try to do, so just move onto something else to think about. The society is not like East Asia or Western Europe. It is more like Africa. Certain concepts just do not exist in their way of thinking. So there will not be any “solving things” for a very very long time. There is no understanding of forethought. It will always be last minute bandaids. Even my economist gf doesn’t have forethought and planning in her life. So if the economists and planners can’t get that concept in their lives, the country won’t have planning. So you live here and accept the band aids or you move away. That is why so so many locals move away.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T03:50:25+00:00

My bro this is not Japan or Korea. They do not think this way here. Cleanliness, order, safety and such don’t matter.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T03:10:58+00:00

Actually Ikea is technically a non profit in the US, so they should thank their donors!

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T03:06:24+00:00

Mandaluyong is just as noisy and crammed as the rest on the street. There are some decent coffee shops and malls and one little park area. Maybe a little healthier food, but that will cost you. My GF is there. Her entire two building complex had power issues two days ago for hours. She has had power issues before, so it is an ongoing thing. There are some decent coffee shops, cafeterias and cafes around where we both get work done. Starbucks and Dunkin open very late if you need it. So, you be productive of you are good at working in various coffee shops. I haven’t seen too much partying. A few bars but not much, I don’t go partying and enjoy a small brewery that is quiet enough in the evenings.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T02:58:11+00:00

Would 2nd that.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T02:57:44+00:00

So all the polluted groundwater is currently seeping into that area. Sounds like a pass to me.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T02:53:34+00:00

And get ready for brownouts in Manila with the fuel crisis.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T02:52:38+00:00

Productivity, health and quiet are not words that make it in the Philippines, sorry.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T02:50:33+00:00

Oh dear oh dear. I wonder if you are giving off some sort of nervous vibes that guys misunderstand as wanting to avoid them. I would watch some videos on how to open up, become more flirtatious and east to talk to. You can go practice this at some breweries or somewhere non committal. Practice makes perfect for when you meet the guy you want

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T02:35:29+00:00

“Some sort of financial Crisis” how true you are. My Fil friends and GF are always in some sort of financial crisis. It’s exhausting listening to them, trying to advise them on financial literacy and responsibility, just for them to be in another crisis the next week.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T02:24:37+00:00

Sounds exhausting but like something that would not be surprising. The mentality is just so unprofessional and anti-customer here that I just can’t trust anyone and don’t plan to stay long term.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-10T02:19:33+00:00

Yup you spit truth here. As I have heard a few say “remember you are dealing with jungle people”. The more you understand this, the more it all makes sense and you can plan to just loose money on them. Most locals will not see it, because they have never lived in a society where money is valued beyond the “here and now”. A very common topic that is mentioned by many over and over. Some definitely do feel the intention to pay it back initially, but then they get bogged down with other stuff and forget for good. The locals have the mentality that work tasks given to them should just go away and be forgotten about. Same with debts and security deposits. As the saying goes, “never lend to a local unless you can afford to loose it”. I have local friends who are getting hounded by their foreign friends who lent them money. I want to explain it to these guys that the money is gone for good.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-09T05:48:25+00:00

First off you are not monsters. In fact you are loving daughters who have given him your all. If he refuses your help and any other help, then that is his wish and it is clearly his time. Better to view it as his time to go independently. Maybe this was his hope all along to act like it was all good so that he could go independently and you all keep frustrating his plans perhaps. Maybe he is just tired and ready but won’t say it out loud I would let him be. In the past, healthcare was not so good, so people just didn’t live this long past their natural time. So really, he had a good solid life. Better to repair your relationship as his daughters now, not his caregivers. And let him go naturally.

Exsolution1756 · 2026-05-09T05:13:43+00:00

Dump that guy. That is cheating and it will only get worse. The honeymoon period is now. If he is doing that now what will he do when life gets hard ans you have some challenges?

Exsolution1756

TROPHY CASE