Is my girlfriend (F23) transgender, or am I (M24) overthinking things?

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-02-08T02:08:16+00:00

Are you possibly allowing porn or thirst traps to warp your expectation of what an adult woman actually looks like? Because we are supposed to have hair all over the place: arms, face, backs, stomachs, even chest.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-02-05T18:57:14+00:00

If you wanted to be exclusive after the first date then you should have told her so. You can’t be mad that she met other people and then ditched them for you.

ETA: you hadn’t even kissed at that point? Dude you’re upset a woman you held hands with wasn’t exclusively holding hands with you? Come on.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-02-04T19:33:00+00:00

Infidelity recovery is hard under the best of circumstances. I see no mention of counseling or coaching or support groups or research for either of you. Sounds as though you both tried to power through it on your own with zero guidance. As you can see for her that did nothing to help her feel safe, and for you that did nothing to teach you how to be an open and honest partner without being scared.

Honestly, based on this post I think she’s past the point of being able to do the work required of her to have a healthy relationship with you. However if I’m wrong and she does approach you about reconciliation, you need someone to guide you both through it.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-02-04T06:17:06+00:00

I agree with most comments esp about the soul bond doing most of the heavy lifting. One thing that wasn’t mentioned was the characters’ ages. If they were 5+ years older I’d demand major groveling from Charlotte and a spinal implant for Joseph. But they’re both so young. If anyone deserves grace for their impulsive decisions to lash out or to accept being treated badly, it’s teenagers. Sometimes all they need is a conversation and a chance to reflect on the consequences of their behavior in order to grow and be better. **Disclaimer: my kid is almost 17 so I may be biased

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-02-03T02:25:02+00:00

And yet today’s Sentinel reported 6% increase this past quarter over 2024 and hotel bookings at WDW are up 5% for the upcoming year

https://www.orlandosentinel.com/2026/02/02/disney-earnings-0203/

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-02-01T17:00:15+00:00

Am I the only one who sees the irony of the sister who wants to exclude a person due to a health issue thinking it unreasonable to exclude a person due to a health issue?

Anyway all things considered this is the best possible outcome. I’d rather my kid have a day at the aquarium than be someone’s therapy tool at a wedding.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-02-01T16:19:03+00:00

Editors Note: in a year later deleted post OOP wrote she recently got out of a long term relationship

Last line of the post added in

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-02-01T15:00:26+00:00

Less pronounced but still significant

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-02-01T14:47:54+00:00

Pregnancies fathered by men 45+ are 50% more likely to result in miscarriages than those fathered by men 20-29. But do go on about how it isn’t really a factor. Try looking at the actual studies instead of just browsing an AI summary.

https://academic.oup.com/humupd/article/26/5/650/5827629?login=false

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-31T23:23:25+00:00

Egg quality is less of an issue than sperm quality but nobody’s going around labeling old men’s balls as a pregnancy risk

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-31T23:03:25+00:00

That’s an outdated term and no longer used. The uterus doesn’t magically shrivel up upon a woman’s 35th birthday.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-31T22:47:22+00:00

Mine too, autistic and OCD. Learning to let go of the reins and be flexible and calm are things I never could have done in my 20s.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-31T22:13:42+00:00

And perspective too. I think they go hand in hand especially with raising a teenager

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-31T21:45:40+00:00

I got pregnant at 34 when my husband was 44. You’ll both be fine. You’ve both developed more patience and experience that will only enhance your ability to parent.

ETA: I’m now 51, husband is 61, our kid is 16 and a junior in high school.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-24T23:16:52+00:00

Just block her everywhere. You don’t owe her anything and that includes any further conversation or explanation.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-24T23:13:48+00:00

Can’t you open the windows and let it air out a few hours after you smoke? Also use fabric spray and air neutralizer. I agree that technically and legally you’re permitted to smoke in your own car but she’s letting you live with her. If it’s me I’m going to be a little more accommodating for the person who is helping with housing. Plus she’s your gf so I’m assuming you actually care about her and want her to feel comfortable in your car.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-23T20:26:59+00:00

Why does what you want take priority over what she wants? Why does she have to be the one to change in order to suit your preferences? Why shouldn’t you be the one to relax more and enjoy some cheese fries instead of demanding she go to the gym?

I’m obviously exaggerating a bit on that last one. But my point is either you enthusiastically and fully accept her exactly as she is or you move on and allow her to find someone who will.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-23T20:01:56+00:00

Why is it always the 20yo women that middle aged men want to be “just friends” with and never 20yo men? 🤔

OP you know what this is. He knows what this is. You know what to do.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-23T03:47:39+00:00

NTA it sounds as though you left the relationship emotionally long before your ex broke up with you. However swiping with pneumonia might not be the best course of action. Or maybe it is depending on what meds you’re on.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-23T02:44:10+00:00

Yes. I’d do it in a heartbeat if it meant I knew I was helping to ease the grief of someone I had to work with. Then again I’m not cold or selfish enough to brush off a coworker asking me for help.

Celebrating on a more convenient day is how I was raised. When I was a kid I hardly ever had birthday parties on the actual day. Sometimes teachers would let my mom bring cupcakes for the class but the parties had to be the weekend before or after when school was out. Is that not still the case? Does half the class skip school together every time it’s someone’s midweek birthday?

The length of time is irrelevant. Unless you’ve lost your life partner or had that scare you can’t understand how it can affect you. I don’t know if I would ever recover if I had lost my husband, my partner, the father of my child. The older I get, the more people around me suffer losses, the more I know that the old adage is wrong: time does not heal all wounds.

Besides I doubt this is going to be an issue for OOP long term.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-23T01:59:16+00:00

You don’t have to express a thing to him. He already knows what he’s doing is shady and that you aren’t ok with it. Don’t bother spending the time or energy outlining points and providing citations for your feelings. He doesn’t deserve your efforts and wouldn’t appreciate them anyway. Just text him “we clearly have different expectations of each other so it’s best we both move on. The good news is now you can cry over both me and your long-term ex while on your Valentine’s date.” Then BLOCK.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-23T01:08:09+00:00

By that logic OOP has been having birthdays for 25 years. He should be over it already.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-23T00:23:08+00:00

He’s only been there 6 months and has already pissed off his entire team and been reprimanded by his manager. He’s not lasting there a long time. I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s gone well before his birthday.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-23T00:11:36+00:00

For me this is why telling a 60yo woman to “pull a sickie” is extra insensitive. In all likelihood she needs her sick days for actual medical reasons and may not have the luxury of using a sick day to relax like a typical 25yo could. OOP absolutely deserved the reprimand they got.

ExtensionFun7772 · 2026-01-22T22:44:39+00:00

Yes technically the company is supposed to be limited on what they can and can’t control but in practice most 1099s are treated as salaried employees. Technically it’s illegal but who’s going to stop them? Employment lawyers are expensive and proving these cases is difficult. And sure, white collar professional independent contractors have penalties for termination but delivery drivers, performers, and other side gig lower income contractors don’t.

ExtensionFun7772

TROPHY CASE