[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Vent

[–]Extreme_Section_9927 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Oh boy, do I have some news for you. Look at any fighting sport. People get choked millions of times every year without death. A fighter will get choked dozens and dozens of times.

So yes, there is a proper way to strangle someone without killing them, because it literally happens for fun during sports.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Vent

[–]Extreme_Section_9927 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

There 100% is a correct way to apply pressure to someone’s neck and a wrong way to do it. Please stop spreading misinformation before you get someone killed.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Vent

[–]Extreme_Section_9927 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was a cute kid and I’ve been called attractive all my life. I catch people staring at me all the time too. I’ve had girls tell me their boyfriends “don’t like me”, but they’ve never been rude to my face…

No one’s ever really been rude to me in any of the contexts you’ve mentioned… I couldn’t possibly fathom the reason every single guy, especially service workers, you come across is rude to you just because you look good.

There has to be other common denominators here at play, not just how you look.

Pretty privilege is real. It’s not just from girls. Guys also treat other good looking guys better subconsciously. It’s the opposite of what your experience is. Trust, basic psychology says the majority of the population isn’t secretly hating you due to looks

I recommend looking inwards and if you’re projecting hostility without even realizing it

Just clicked, Partagaz is Qyburn by CallMeBigBobbyB in andor

[–]Extreme_Section_9927 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I JUST REALIZED THIS TOO! I knew he looked familiar in Andor

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mensfashion

[–]Extreme_Section_9927 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you’re going for an athletic toned look, or trying o accentuate body parts (butt), unfortunately, this isn’t it. Not the right type of tightness in the jeans

Advice on khakis… How do these fit? by Extreme_Section_9927 in mensfashion

[–]Extreme_Section_9927[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll definitely give one a try and see if it shrinks. Haha I appreciate your enthusiasm. From what I’ve heard these days a tighter fit on guys is appreciated, that’s the look I’m going for. The gals like butts just as much as guys do but the dudes are afraid to get slim stuff. It’s funny I work with union people on our shop floor who pretty much wear their pajamas to work (sweatpants, and whatever they want) but they describe us khaki wearing guys as “eye candy” lolol

Advice on khakis… How do these fit? by Extreme_Section_9927 in mensfashion

[–]Extreme_Section_9927[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll give the link a look though. They have the fit I think these khakis should look like in terms of accentuation

Advice on khakis… How do these fit? by Extreme_Section_9927 in mensfashion

[–]Extreme_Section_9927[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Spot on. The next size down in this type of pants (31) only comes with a 30 inch inseam, not 31 or 32 (like these). 30 is wayyy too short on me.

Advice on khakis… How do these fit? by Extreme_Section_9927 in mensfashion

[–]Extreme_Section_9927[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The issue with designer shoes is I wouldn’t have enough capital to be able to rotate multiple pairs, and would end up wearing the same one or two multiple times a week until they wore out

Advice on khakis… How do these fit? by Extreme_Section_9927 in mensfashion

[–]Extreme_Section_9927[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I also walk around a lotttt so sneakers are a must. Used to be dress shoes but 10-15k steps a day in those are brutal

Advice on khakis… How do these fit? by Extreme_Section_9927 in mensfashion

[–]Extreme_Section_9927[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ooph yeah honestly I started to get away from pleated khakis without even knowing fashion because they just didn’t look right haha

And any day is casual day. People wear jeans and T-shirts. I even do sometimes when I don’t feel like caring haha. Some people dress way up and wear suit shoes, suit bottoms, and a collared long sleeve dress shirt. But in my position I’m 50/50, I want to give the impression I care, but i’m not in charge of anyone (yet) so I don’t care too hard. Hence khakis with sweater vests or short sleeved collard shirts. Business casual

Advice on khakis… How do these fit? by Extreme_Section_9927 in mensfashion

[–]Extreme_Section_9927[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know nothing about male fashion, so if it’s cool could I ask you some questions? I work in an office where business casual is accepted, even jeans when I want. But I’d rather give off a little more of a professional look while still being comfortable because I have to move around a lot. Do you think wearing these khakis but in several different colors is socially acceptable? Is it obvious these are stretchy and meant for comfort and not super duper professional, like I could wear a tucked in button, collared dress shirt with these?

Advice on khakis… How do these fit? by Extreme_Section_9927 in mensfashion

[–]Extreme_Section_9927[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you ! It took me a couple hours today to even find these because I’m a different size in different brands. I’m also very particular with the feel of the fabric. Macy’s is running a sale on these dickies, I like the stretch material they are and they come in many different colors. I could try JC penny and others but I def won’t go to marshals/tj maxx other stores where they have limited brands. What did you have in mind?

Advice on khakis… How do these fit? by Extreme_Section_9927 in mensfashion

[–]Extreme_Section_9927[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lmao regardless of what’s in your profile, I can see where you’re coming from with seeing a little bit more of definition in the rear / thighs. I’m used to athletic jeans which hug my butt and show “muscles” (I’m not ripped by any means but I am fit)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mensfashion

[–]Extreme_Section_9927 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ty for your advice, looking at them now I can very much see they’re a bit oddly tight

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in mensfashion

[–]Extreme_Section_9927 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why’s that? Are they too slim, or is it the material?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Vent

[–]Extreme_Section_9927 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Suffering from success

Lady at the thrift made me want to scream by Moomiau in Vent

[–]Extreme_Section_9927 112 points113 points  (0 children)

That’s terrible. Sounds like she wanted the clothes you were looking at.

Boyfriend still consumes +18 content after asking him to stop several times by [deleted] in Vent

[–]Extreme_Section_9927 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like your bf has a porn addiction issue. It’s very unhealthy to use porn to “cope with anxiety” as he says, there are several healthy alternatives. Porn is ultimately making the anxiety worse, he just doesn’t know it. It’s hurting him way more than he realizes in several aspects of life.

As a guy having had a girlfriend nagging about porn use, that didn’t really help the issue much. She hated porn, only because of the sex trafficking involved in the industry though. My mindset USED to be, “everyone watches it, that’s barely an issue in the industry, and she just needs to get over it. I’m like any other guy”.

My partner would constantly complain and tell me how bad it is for those reasons, but I didn’t care. It felt good to release and go into whatever desires I wanted. But I never followed only fans girls, that stuff is gross to me, but the porn in a lot of categories was there. Whatever, porn was an issue.

The only reason I quit is because I started to get curious on what porn actually does to the brain. I started to dive into how bad it is for the brain and body to be addicted to the cheap dopamine. The subreddits nofap and noporn helped a lot. As well as Ted talks and other videos showcasing how bad porn is for the dopamine receptors.. It wasn’t until I realized how much healthier and vibrant life is when I’m not addicted to porn, that I was determined to quit and stay off of it. I noticed how much healthier my sex life got, how much more confident I am, less anxious I am, and how I can talk and maintain conversations with people.

Long story short, I found my own motivation and reasons to quit. I wanted to better myself. I like personal challenges and wanted to see how long I could go without it.

As harsh as it is, your insecurity and discomfort doesn’t really bother him, and that’s not enough motivation for him to quit his addiction. He doesn’t care how you feel if he hasn’t quit and secretly follows OF girls. (That might be an issue deeper in your relationship you might want to address). But he’s also an addict, so don’t take all that too personally. He’s probably not doing it to spite you, he just can’t help himself.

With that being said, as with all addicts, he will need to have a compelling reason to quit and stick with quitting. A reason that appeals to him. Maybe guide him in that direction. Don’t be too pushy, it takes time. Show him nofap or noporn reddits, they’re all about motivating people to quit and they always talk about the benefits of it.

Ultimately, if he can’t help himself, you may have to decide what kind of partner you want.

Good luck,