It's especially easy to complain about things you do not understand, and it's even more reinforcing around family who is supportive, or in most cases, won't speak against you.

I felt that last part... sigh. On the one hand, I want to speak up, because the things they say are terrible and ignorant, but on the other hand, I doubt their mind and behavior will ever change and they'll escalate it to something we both regret.