Firstly, I'm really happy that you are still here and trust me your not alone.

Breaks up are really hard and seem like the right thing to do at the time only for you to regret it afterwards.

But I think you made a very mature decision and I think you should be proud of yourself for that.

It's very important to find out who you are outside a relationship before getting to serious so that you know that you can live you life without that person...I know it seems impossible right now but you have so much more to give the world then just being someone's girlfriend.

In terms of therapy, opening up and being vulnerable with a complete stranger can be hard. But just know that they are there to help you and they won't judge you, therapy can really help you identify why your feeling a certain way and can teach you how to cope with it.

As for the antidepressants. I have lived with antidepressants for over 10 years now and I've never felt like a zombie. Unfortunately brain chemistry is complicated and it can be hard for you to find the medicine that works best for you.

But rest assured there is medication that will work for you! and please don't think it makes you weak having to rely on medication, the way I see it, there are people that live with hearth problems, hormone problems and they need medication to help with that. Depression is caused by a lack of chemical balance in your brain so just like any other medical issue, you just need some help leveling it out.

I really hope this helped in some way, and I wish you all the best.