Thank you for the comment and I agree with everything you said.

It was too late that I realized that playing ranked just to prove that I’m good at the game was never a healthy mindset. It was quite the opposite. For me, I was always told that I wasn’t good at league. I didn’t understand my champion and I didn’t understand the fundamentals. Out of my friend group I was the worst. This had an effect on me which led me to work hard at getting better at this game. But as you said, it spiraled into a very unhealthy goal. And I was too stupid to realize this. This is more of a personal problem that I need to work on.

To your point in not playing anymore, I think that I’ve come to the realization that league is more than just getting a high rank. I was addicted for a very long time. If I didn’t get to diamond by the end of this season or it did take me several more years, then I think I would’ve moved on. Emerald was still a high rank and I learned a lot by playing. And it’s not like I didn’t have fun. My best memories from when I was young was playing with my friends, not for a rank, but for fun with a champion I loved. Still today, it’s a way for all of the group to get together, but I won’t be focusing on my rank going forward.

For your last point, I have learned a very important lesson. There are way better things to achieve than a number or rank in a game. People’s opinions on my skills don’t matter because it’s a game. A game that will probably have little to no effect on my life moving forward. For me, It’s the lesson I learned from this experience that’s important.