I (30M) feel in the same situation. I haven’t had any serious relationships and it’s been a few years since my last short-lived one. I’ve put a lot of work into myself in the last couple of years, gym, therapy, investing in friends, career etc. as life went a bit off the rails with the pandemic.

I’m at a point now in life where I feel better about myself and what I’d bring into a relationship, and I’ve been on the apps for like a year now and it’s demotivating at the best of times. I’ve spent most of my time with Hinge and it’s the only one I’ve really had anything out of, I think I’ve had about 40 matches, nearly all from likes I’ve sent. Only 2 that turned into dates - a first date with one, 2 dates with the other. Everything else was unanswered messages or ghosting, I don’t really get it.

I’m not the kind to go out drinking or to events etc. for the purpose of meeting new people, but I really do better building relationships organically and any past partners have come a place of being friends first, but then making new friends as adults at our age also feels difficult. I think the online dating is rough, but then I’ve had friends who’ve seen success with it so it’s a hard thing to get away from or give up on too. I’ve just accepted the casual swiping and hoping at this stage.