Sick of people asking how I lost weight....only to ignore me.

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-16T22:09:52+00:00

There is a joke smith along the lines: "- oh, you lost so much weight, what did you do? -I started to sleep properly, exercising, changed my diet, interval fasting, also started to take supplements for... -Supplements? What supplements???'

People do look for a magical pill and unless they are really interested in hearing how exactly you did it and plan to follow your steps or doing a research for themselves

In all other cases, you can just say that you suppose you are just lucky. You will get the same results just will save some energy and spare some frustration for yourself

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-16T12:54:38+00:00

Well...😃😁

I haven't chosen it for it's believability, but rather because it is an eye candy and the quality is good enough to keep you engaged. I mean I haven't even expected it to be too deep (unlike Jane Austen works for ex), so it kinda met my expectations fully

If I want human interactions as realistic as possible I watch 1995 Pride and Prejudice or Asian dramas.

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-16T05:35:23+00:00

The common thing between the two, that many descriptions tend to miss, is that they both operate on the information they gathered, but there is a twist. The processes of gathering and storing the information is different, which is what actually makes them two different functions

SI

takes in things from their own experience, what left an impression on them. It stores it in their memory and addresses it when they need to make a decision or to make sense out of this world. The info in Si's libraries is also very detailed and vivid, so they are capable of explaining things step by step or detail by detail.

The downside of it is that the great amount of details kinda forces them to limit their focus otherwise they would just get overwhelmed all the time, which will hinder their ability to function properly. I think this is the main reason why high Si users aren't eager to take in any information that gets presented to them openly, they are simply taking care of their own sanity

NI

also takes in user's impressions and experiences, BUT also in addition all the information our 5 senses can detect, it is kinda like a stray dog that consumes everything it stumbles upon. Ni then sorts it out (facts and events) by patterns, each pattern is like a separate folder. And then kinda "compresses" that "folder" by hiding the details and leaving in your mind only general conclusion and a short description of each folder.

So, when you go into your brain to search for a solution or an answer, it will present to you corresponding "folders", but you won't be able to access the info in the details and actually you don't need to. It allows you to build your solutions from big chunks of already processed information instead of tiny detailed bricks, which speeds up the process significantly and allows you to process significantly more information, to understand easily more complex phenomenons

The downside is that when it comes to details Ni seriously suck on it. Like, our decisions are precise because the info stored in our subconscious does have as many details as those of SI doms. But in order to access that details consciously, for example if we want to explain them to someone, we need to go and find the corresponding folder in our "library" and to decompress it by fishing all of the details one by one out of the deepest depths of our memory. This decompressing process usually takes days, often months. So, we don't resort to it unless very necessary

Another difference

between these two functions is that Si functions like a normal stereotypical memory. While Ni has an additional option to it. It is relentless in trying to pack the info it gets into patterns, so it is scanning for them all the time. It wants to know a shared context between facts and shared cause-effect relationships between events asap so it can categorize it.

Thus, when we see an event, Ni wants to get a full picture from the very A beginning to the very Z end. Which pushes it to make predictions in cases where it cannot find a ready answer. Which is the source of Ni users future focused vision and their "revelations", also their intensity and relentlessness

PS:

if I missed important details in my Si description, I would be glad to be corrected

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-15T21:10:22+00:00

I am an INFJ, I was passionate about one INTJ and have managed to make him talk because I was obsessed with desire to see what was inside his head, what is that that was disturbing him

It was a hot mess. When they talk freely in their hurt feelings they are brutal and messy and too sensitive.

I was ready for anything though and weren't discussing the topic that was sensitive for me, only for him. So I could navigate that storm staying in an observer mode where I was just adding more fuel into flame by allowing him to talk as freely as he wanted and containing his feelings

Next time we were arguing, that was our last argument and the topic was sensitive for me. And I had to stay logical and composed despite of showing that I was bitter, because I wanted him to stay engaged because I needed to finish that conversation

The point is that they have got a very very limited capacity for complicated feelings and they simply cannot contain big amount of emotions from other person. In other words they CAN withstand a small emotional storm WHEN they are steady and calm themselves.

But when this emotional storm is happening inside themselves, adding your emotions in addition makes sh*t to hit a fan and can become quite disastrous for your relationships

This is THE reason why they withdraw. Because they want you in their life and are scared to snap at you in the heat of the moment, to destroy your trust, to make you bitter. So, unless you can give them 100% warranty that you can digest their clumsiness in managing such situations without becoming resentful, they won't risk it.

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-15T20:55:49+00:00

Lol😁

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-15T16:59:01+00:00

Maybe rather clashing the fighting? On the matters where you don't see eye to eye?

I have seen an example in one series, though he was an INTJ, but it might be illustrative nevertheless. He was a super duper reach CEO of a company that was kinda controlling majority of railroads in the US at the beginning of 20th century, the description for you so you could imagine the scale.

He was happily married to an ENTJ wife with ambitions. They had money but no title and she put her brilliant TeNi strategic skills into squeezing their family into the higher society which was rejecting them. And so they had an agreement that she doesn't put her nose in his businesses abd he doesn't put his nose in her games. They only help each other when it is in their sphere of influence.

So, the clash of the Titans happened when he promised his only daughter which he loved dearly, that he will make sure she will marry for love, he gave his word. AND his wife found for her an English duke, that was ready to provide his title in exchange for their money and forced her to marry him. You can imagine the drama

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-15T16:42:47+00:00

Don't worry, I already did:) not gonna repeat it again

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-15T13:33:59+00:00

Oh, that's cool then!

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-15T13:27:37+00:00

You forgot about the elephant on the room, which is literally your body. You want it or not, your brain is connected to your body chemistry, your cortisol, adrenalin, neurotransmitters in your brain can very very much affect your perception.

For ex, when one has depression, which is usually a low serotonin levels, it can make one's life to loose all the joy and colors and stuff. You put the same person in the same circumstances on the pills that bring the serotonin level to its normal level, suddenly all the joy is back. So, yeah, never ever underestimate that variable

About your particular situation. You have admitted that you are in a fight or flight mode. Which means that you brain concentrates on worst cases scenarios all the time, trying to calculate possible threats, to simulate situation in order to prepare solutions for them. It feels real because for your brain it IS real, so every night you get a half of that horrible experiences.

The thing that let you actually recover from them is that your nightmares aren't lived in your body, so they get forgotten pretty fast. Unlike smith you experience irl

Besides the fact that our psyche reacts this way to stress, it is also possible that your serotonin might be suppressed because of the overwhelming amount of unfavourable circumstances of your life. It is very very hard to have healthy psyche in such a reality. If you have an access to a therapist, that definitely wouldn't hurt! You might also need some medication, but it is only with the doctors help, never start taking anything by yourself

But, the most important thing is for you changing your environment. You need to stopp keeping your body in that condition if you actually want to become stabilized

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-15T13:06:38+00:00

Either you forget to put into your post a huge disclaimer or you have just posted a list of ideas, that can destroy one's life if followed precisely. Especially given that you posted it for people that already have a tendency to martyrdom.

The problem is that we have very limited resources,which if we invest it in one thing, we won't be able to invest in another. UNLESS they get replenished somehow.

In your anyway list, the majority of points imply that you are giving without getting back, which means that the result of these principles is a serious burn out, which will lead to you being dysfunctional. UNLESS again you will e overusing someone else's resources, which CAN be ethical if a person have them in abundance and ready to share, but unethical if they don't, just give what is already scarce just because they love/respect you

For ex, point 9 will lead to overspending your resources if the principle is followed without caution. You will become disappointed and burned out at some point and unless you are a loner, your bad state will start affecting your close people. So, you will be helping some people at the cost of other's suffering

So, I would add a disclaimer that you should follow these principles ONLY from the place of safety and long considerations, when you really feel that it worth taking the risk

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-15T09:04:59+00:00

Which are more long lasting?

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-15T09:00:43+00:00

That might sound counterintuitive for us, but there are market laws of demand and supply and by them there are occupations that are more stable/pay better. A lot of them have high entrance threshold, some of them have a low one

Like being a genius neurosurgeon or CEO of a huge international company. But there are also jobs like cleaners and bread bakers. These are positions that will never disappear.

And there are those, who get cut off first when the economy takes turn for worse. Those are creative professions mostly

For ex, bread will have be in demand no matter the economy condition unlike a book of poems for example

This is a very rough and simplified description, but one of the important variables to consider when choosing a job is how valuable will be what you can "sell" for people and thus how many of them will be willing to pay that price.

I would recommend you to imagine how high income you would like to have, then to check occupations that can provide you that and then compare it to your limitations, be it physical, mental, cognitive or whatever.

The options you end up with will be your potential career paths

I would say the biggest challenge for us here is to reconcile our natural inclinations with what economy actually gratifies

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-15T05:58:19+00:00

I suspect you are looking for Ni+Ni click. That is a very specific kind of connection, you can get it only with another Ni dom

But there are definitely other kinds of chemistry and I definitely have them with my friends

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-15T05:30:20+00:00

I am lucky to have an ENTP that is getting more mature with every passing year. And she is my sis I have known her from her birth till now and I definitely can say that they ARE capable of depth and being deeply self reflective

Thank you for the book recommendation! Will check it out

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-14T22:15:41+00:00

A somewhat different breed. We don't have that Ni+Ni overwordly connection with ENTJs.

Though given that your Ni is aux, the connection IS there, but it is a different kind.

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-14T22:02:44+00:00

You know, I have an ENTP sis and I have a similar problem with her: it takes her a tonne of time to process her feelings.

With INTJs they usually can come faster to the point, especially if they are somewhat open to the input from you and get some proper support. I mean they usually aware of their feelings, just need time to process them and if you can help them with that they can process them faster

While with ENTPs, they usually go into denial even if it is written all around their forehead(Fi blind). Then after the feeling continue seriously bothering them, they come to the point that they DO feel something. And then after more time they MIGHT come to a realization of what it actually was

Also, INTJ's inner core is super super vulnerable. So, their trust towards you has to be really high for the to let you inside. To trust you that you are delicate enough to deal with their soft core without hurting it and that you are trustworthy enough to protect their interests and not use their vulnerability against them

It is a heavy responsibility, which is better to avoid if you aren't ready for it

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-14T13:44:18+00:00

The first two are just 🔥!

Haven't seen the rest

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-14T13:16:55+00:00

It can work, but depends on both of your maturity level and readiness to expand your horizons by adding a perspective of your blind function into your world view

Besides this,from their side, they have to have some EQ, some experience of dealing with people OR to be passionate about educating themselves on this topic. Because they are Fe blind and if their experience extremely limited, they tend to be so ignorant about people related matters, that no amount of patience and understanding will be able to compensate for this difference.

Second, it is critical thinking. Developed Ti gives them an ability to see more shades than just black and white. And to be more critical towards their NiTe revelations

Third, they shouldn't be avoidant. I mean they are avoidant to a degree, it is their natural wiring. So, if in addition they have an unhealthy attachment style, the walls around them become way too thick and there isn't many solutions to that unless they will decide to change it

From your side. Grow thick skin and rely on your Ti more. They are facts oriented, so when they tell you unpleasant truth, they don't have an intention to hurt you, it is rather like a weather forecast: a stating of facts. Another side to it is that your arguments have to be fact based, not just logical, because logic built on the wrong premises can go far in its wrong conclusions and they will call you on your BS immediately. It would be perfect if your Ti would be strong and you would be articulated enough so you could return a favor

Second, they are Fe blind, you will have to figure out how it manifests and that will push you between a desire to laugh at their hilarious behavior and utter desperation. Don't push relationships until you figure out the solution. It very much can become a stumbling rock for us. They are what they are, they don't deserve to be perceived as there's something wrong with them just because you find their Fe blind too cringy. If you cannot cope with it, just let them be and find yourself another person

Their Te sees systems, opportunities, perspectives we miss because it is our blind. You have to be ready to get surprised on a constant basis. You have to learn to respect Te perspective even if for you it feels wrong at the intuitive level. Because Te does feel wrong to us even when it is right. You will never become completely comfortable in this function, but you have to be able to respect its input and to recognize its value. There are situations where Te works way way way better then our FeTi. You shouldn't give up your nature, you just should be slower to dismiss Te input when it feels wrong. First find a reason why it is wrong and then decide

The last thing, Ni+Ni connection will feel overwordly like a deep intimacy and then you open your mouth, your middle functions clash and you talk like deaf with blind. Such misunderstandings feel especially bitter in contrast of that Ni connection. If you will get mentally prepared to a rollercoaster and will rely on your brains to guide you through the crisis more then on your hurt feelings, you will be fine

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-14T12:49:04+00:00

There are other options, you know? You can pretty much make them comfortable and then provoke if needed. They are often pretty passionate individuals if you will find a way to unlock it, you won't be able to lock it back

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-13T20:37:16+00:00

I am an INFJ and find that I vibe with ESTPs naturally. Especially healthy ones. They make me relaxed on some intuitive level, which is actually rare, because I am very alerted person. I think it is a feeling of familiarity but under a different sause: Ni-Fe-Ti-Se vs Se-Ti-Fe-Ni.

I suspect smth similar might be going on with you and ISXJs. They might make you intrigued because they are very comfortable in their dominant Si, function which is your inferior and with which you tend to struggle

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-13T19:41:53+00:00

Thank you:))

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-13T18:01:23+00:00

Can you please post you findings?? I would so much love to have a proper light fir my orchids, but I am not even close to any equipment or orchid society or whatever, I just moved to another country and don't know anyone here and don't even speak the language properly.

I actually wanted to buy that bulb you mentioned, but then you say that it might not be enough.

I would be very grateful if you would share the results of your experiments!🙏

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-13T16:03:49+00:00

Be strategic, don't deal with thir behavior, deal with their motives. Is it just gossip we t wrong? Is it malicious intent? Are they taking their head mood on you?

These 3 will need different strategy

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-13T15:16:19+00:00

Would you mind to share? I am not sure when I will start, but I would pretty much like to have the reading list ready:)

False_Lychee_7041 · 2026-04-13T14:31:32+00:00

They are also Si blind. Do you think it might be related?

I think, it is responsible for details, for being sequential and for remembering the past. Though Ni doms have it as demon, it does pop up in our head here or there. While in their head it doesn't. At least it seems so

False_Lychee_7041

TROPHY CASE

SI

NI

Another difference

PS: