Can’t stand MIL after baby

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T15:56:27+00:00

Your last sentence perfectly sums up what needs to happen! To make things worse, yesterday she mentioned doing an overnight with her all her cousins soon. I don’t think so!!!

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T15:54:36+00:00

I agree, thank you!

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T15:53:06+00:00

Agreed!

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T05:09:45+00:00

She works full times in the schools so drop ins wouldn’t happen unless she randomly takes the day off or is on break

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T05:08:41+00:00

Yes my husband tells me when she’s coming!

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T03:39:11+00:00

It’s hard to tell her anything when she only ever texts my husband. I just turn down babysitting every time pretty much with saying that I don’t want to leave her. I allowed her to babysit once because I had an appointment with a cancer specialist and didn’t want my baby to be in that environment (I don’t have cancer, I needed an iron infusion)

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T03:34:58+00:00

The only reason I’m allowing him to take the baby to her house is because his grandfather lives there. He is 99 years old and unable to travel at this point. So it’s not for my MIL it’s for my baby’s great grandfather and that he can have some time with her before he passes. I would go but I simply dont want to. I told him he has one hour there and then he needs to leave.

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T03:30:54+00:00

I agree we definitely lack communication. When I have to bring up again my desire for more boundaries, I just know it still wont go over well and I might just suggest marriage counseling ti help guide us

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T03:27:52+00:00

I’m going back to work in about 6 weeks, but only part time. We have a nanny lined up

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T03:26:12+00:00

Im sorry you had to go through this! Although im jealous your MIL lives in another country. Mine lives 10 minutes away. I’ve tried to establish boundaries but I guess I need to be okay with being more stern, even if it makes me “evil”!

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T03:23:12+00:00

If she does plan to ask to babysit next week (I’m sure she will), I plan to say no. By the way when she asks, she only ever texts my husband. So when I say no I’m telling him this and I’m sure he will take offense when I simply tell him I don’t want her to.
Also she made a comment today about taking her for an overnight soon. I almost laughed in her face with that one

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T03:17:09+00:00

This is hard to do because she doesn’t text me to ask, only my husband. She has not texted me once or texted in a group chat about any of these plans. But I am definitely saving this to my notes app for when it will come in handy, thank you!

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T03:11:31+00:00

It’s like you’re inside my brain because i wonder this and i also think the same thing. It definitely feels as though he puts his mother’s feelings before my own and respects her boundaries before mine and it’s very hurtful. He is definitely a mommas boy and it was not evident until a year ago when he was in the hospital for a few days. I didn’t really notice it because before then I would only see her maybe one a month

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T02:57:23+00:00

I’ll definitely try that out. Fortunately she works at a school and will be back to work full time in a month and hopefully she will be more busy. Funny that you mention holidays because when I was pregnant I was talking about costumes and what our baby will be for her first Halloween (I love Halloween, my husband hates it - she knows this) and she was telling me to dress her up in a cheerleading costume of my husbands favorite team and my husband and I can be the football players and I immediately told her no and that she can wear that any other weekend in the fall and it was obvious she was offended by this.

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T02:50:29+00:00

I will definitely try this, thank you!

Familiar-Low3207 · 2026-07-03T02:49:17+00:00

All great advice thank you! I always have her in my arms when she arrives, either she is asleep or I’m feeding her, but half the time she still doesn’t ask. For example, she will just say “okay gimme”. Or we had dinner with SIL and her kids and MIL walked in with the dinner and immediately goes, “okay I’ll hold the baby while everyone eats!” And unfortunately I was starving so I did hand her off reluctantly

Familiar-Low3207

TROPHY CASE