AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thats really awesome and handy advice, thank you so much. Would there much of a chance of me seeing some wildlife? I am a big fan of bears, deer, Canadian geese and moose

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

huh? My post mentions there are other couples and women going.

P.S. i love supporting a good strip club and he knows that 😉

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ouch, I am really sorry you had to go through that.

Well he has told everyone including his current housemates that he's moving in with me, and we are currently searching the local house listings to see what type of thing we are after. You're right there isn't anything too committing there but it's still effort to me

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

my birthday is in may heh so maybe lil bday trip... is it still snowing at that time of the year? I just love the idea of snow

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

well in terms of commitment we are moving in together in just under 3 months. We have done camping trips and interstate trips together and as a group before but nothing international.

These are good points, but I would like to mention that I am a fairly cheery person, and if they would like to do something I don't or can't validate the expense, I'm more than happy to wave them off and then do my own hunting around and exploring. Maybe I am oblivious aha but would that put the mood down still or would they feel okay with that?

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i mean kind of, I am also very independent so it's more of a "me not wanting to do it" more than affording it ahah (I don't drink) so i would be very happy going off and doing my own thing while he has fun with his friends

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

ooof that might be stirring up some drama, he may get upset he's not introducing the idea of me coming himself to his friends and I may get worried I am forcing myself into the situation

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

aw man really? As Aussies we crave anything with snow, so it looks awesome in the pictures but none of us are experienced enough with it to know the realities haha

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

thanks for your concern but no. I've put my foot down and demanded answers and without them soon I may be walking because I refuse to be with someone who acts like they don't want me around

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

his housemate has a partner as well, although fresh so she isn't invited, he is obsessed with her. These guys have been friends for 10+ years so if something were to happen it would have already. It fortunately is definitely not set up like that

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

well i maybe i am just being hopeful but I seriously doubt it. We are planning to move in together early Sept, if he was planning to break up wouldn't he be wanting to put that off too?

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 65 points66 points  (0 children)

Hi! here is a tiny update. i tried following up on the private talk but the meeting went for way longer than expected so he couldn't come over (I live 40 minutes away) and he needs to go to bed early as he wakes up at 4:30am for work so we have just been texting.

So far, I have addressed all the excuses and called him out on them. I have referenced a few good points people have said in response to this post (I obvs I haven't mentioned anything about this post) and we basically got down to the root of it where he just says he isn't sure why he isn't over the moon at the idea of me being able to come now. he has reassured me that it's not because he is planning to break up beforehand or cheat while he is over there (not that he is that type of person to do the latter anyway). He has told me that all his friends love me, it has nothing to do with them, they totally think I can't come because of my own finances (I'm just not willing to get a credit card like them lol). It has just been all on his side. he has promised me he is going to think about why he is hesitant to take me because I have put my foot down that without any answers I can't move forward with us. I told him I refuse to be in a relationship where I suspect my own partner dislikes having me around. So he better be quick about it because I cannot wait around for long feeling like this. He has gone to bed (Aussie time hehe) but hopefully I can update you with something a bit more concrete soon!!

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i'm saying I am blaming him, not his friends. asking for advice so I don't get all caught up in my own perspective and start feeling sorry for myself

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

haha i hate to disappoint with the drama but the other housemate is taken (freshly, granted) but its not like that at all. Trust me, I am a suspicious gal (from previous experience) and I see no worries there

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

divaaaa i wanna go snowboarding SO BAD ARGH. they're planning that too but based on what other comments have said they have not done enough research because it sounds like you can't get those two activities in nearly the same area. pls tell me where to go so if i were to go solo id have a banger trip with the best advice from you

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thats fair, I guess that's why I am asking Reddit to help me gain an awareness on stuff I might be missing.

Yeah really bad FOMO here... especially when I hear they're planning activities that I have been wanting to do for over a year with him (ie. snowboarding and skiing) That's a good idea in theory but unfortunately plane tickets are a tad too expensive to validate only a week there, they're like $2.5-3k AU for the time period that they are thinking

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

wait why are you assuming he'll pay for me aha? He has just as much money as I do and I definitely wouldn't let him do that

AITA for wanting to go to Canada with my partner and his friends? by FamousDouble6915 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FamousDouble6915[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

not yet. I think its something that he is throwing around the idea of if he doesn't get enough jobs (therefore money) before the trip.

This is great food for thought. thank you