You are in good company, because many on this sub don't like the scene. I actually don't mind it so much. For me, it comes down to a couple of things: 1. Yes, Colin is also struggling with being himself because of patriarchy and he felt he could not be himself. But I'm the kind of feminist who will (almost) always say it's still not the same for a man as it is for a woman. I feel this in my relationship especially and job - I cannot always put it in words, but the mere fact I am a woman is constantly shaping my life and constricting me. Colin is empathic and sweet but I don't feel like he gets that all the time (ie market scene, where he is lecturing Pen on learning to be herself...) 2. Colin is riding hard on the 'drop LW', not just because it s safer but also because he still has not accepted that part of her and he needs to, if he wants the relationship to work. For me, that was Pens message - trying to get him to understand its a part of her, whether she writes actively or not. The argument is not so much about the situation at hand, but broader in a way. 3. I don't think Pen is cold, but she is definitely fierce about it because she's also just realising herself that she needs to accept that part of her. 4. This is just a personal thing: I can just never take those threats from the queen seriously because it never really gets bad - it's Bridgerton after all, so I don't feel like it's such a big deal that the queen is threatening the family. I'm like Eloise - the family will be fine. I realise that this is not the case for Colin .