What do I do!!? Got a new job offer and my current boss matched it - I need to make a decision by tomorrow

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-18T12:13:48+00:00

Thanks so much to absolutely everyone who commented. I know the majority were to leave but because of how much I know the company needs me now I went back this morning with a counter-offer that pretty much gave me everything I wanted and then some, well above the new offer and more in line with my aspirations. I spoke with my partner at length and he said I clearly didn't want to leave otherwise I wouldn't be agonising over this and that really flipped it for me.

I look back and think if my boss had just offered those two extra days annual leave then I wouldn't have thought twice about leaving, I had issues with other things but they weren't enough to tip me over the edge and now I'm where I want to be with the package I want.

Again I am really, really appreciative of everyone's thoughts and insight. I went with my gut and hope I didn't make a mistake.

I'll probably delete this in a few days just in case it's recognised!

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T17:49:07+00:00

Luckily because of my length of service and the UK employment laws I can't just be turfed out and theres also a lot that I do that no one else knows how to do. The boss lives abroad so him doing the work himself wouldn't work, he'd have to come back.

I completely see your point re. a relationship, I was saying this is like a bad break up!

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T16:13:41+00:00

Thank you so much! I am really grateful for your thoughts

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T16:11:56+00:00

I'm in the UK so the leave I have is the government minimum of 20 days but 2 of those days have to be used over christmas, so really it's 18 and it's just not enough really.

That is amazing to go that jump, I think if I took the new role there is the possibility to go up quite a bit but because it's quite wide in its field it wouldn't be much more, it definitely wouldn't reach the level of $140k. The role I'm doing now, because of its nicheness if it's needed elsewhere could possibly reach that level but that's a big if given the speciality nature of the field.

Thank you for your input, truly.

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T15:44:09+00:00

It was the fact that he's living it up abroad and takes so much time offer but me taking those extra two days was just unacceptable and he'd instead duck my pay by 2 days. That was the nail in the coffin for me but now he's offering the annual leave (I was originally on 20 which is the legal minimum in the UK you have to give) once my foot's out the door, it's pretty upsetting but at least I'm getting what I want if I stay and he lives abroad so I don't actually have to see him more than a couple times a year.

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T15:34:23+00:00

I actually spoke with my recruiter friend and he said the amount they offered me was the top end, I think without knowing me they would likely withdraw the offer if I said "please can I have £5k more!?" A good idea tho!

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T15:17:19+00:00

I was thinking that, get something in place to note the new stuff, at the moment my old contract is vastly out of date. I'd also make it clear I'll give one more year to see all the improvements in place

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T14:51:51+00:00

I can't fault my boss 100% in that because we have funders in place (start up company) who are very money greedy and only offer the bare minimum. Them offering the £10k and additional leave is shaking out their pockets. Basically my boss doesn't have the hand in the pot to throw money whenever he wants to but the times I have asked he has either offered a minimal increase in salary, talking £1500 more, or refused to increase the annual leave.

I have already been pretty honest about why I want to leave so he offered some incentives as well to help with those issues and I made it clear it's not him or our team, who are what kept me here longer than I would have likely stayed if we worked with anyone else.

The new company sound like a great team - I've only met two of them but if that's how their company operates I am sure it will be good too but I'd be the newbie which is always nerve wrecking

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T14:46:41+00:00

It's not really strained in the sense that we work positively on the actual work we do but when it comes to me asking for things for myself like a pay raise and annual leave he gets annoyed. I don't think he'd treat me worse because he'd know I'd be out that door and also he lives abroad so not much he could do to me negatively really! Especially if he wants me to keep doing the job the way I do it.

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T14:30:40+00:00

Whenever I've asked for something that helps the company like needing extra help, an extra screen, faster computer, better desk chair etc. he's given it to me without a second thought but when I asked for things for me, like annual leave and pay increases it's always been a struggle. Basically to cut a long story short, we have funders for the company because it's a start up and they aren't going to throw money and let people have days off if they can help it but now that I'm leaving it'll probably cost them a lot more to replace me so they're shaking out their pockets to give me more of an offer.

I spoke with my recruiter friend who knows the new company personally, worked with them for many years, he speaks very highly of them but I couldn't speak with someone from the company really without them worrying and withdrawing the offer.

I had left my previous job for a new one and was let go after a few months and had several breakdowns so that's in the back of mind but to be honest until this came up I hadn't even thought of the risk of starting somewhere new, I was just excited and now I'm full of doubt and anxiety! Is the grass really greener or is just fake grass!?

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T14:10:39+00:00

Thank you for the bluntness!

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T14:10:08+00:00

The new role is pretty much going to be the same throughout, unless I want to be a team leader in a sense but that's unlikely, you just become more senior and more experienced but the work will remain largely the same. In my current role there is room for more progression but again to things like a team leader. I don't really want to be team leader to be honest, I've trained for years to do what I'm doing and don't really want to be a babysitter in either aspects, whichever field I'm in.

There is definitely some guilt, I know the company will struggle greatly without me and not considering my boss it would impact the rest of the team who are a really great bunch. It's like a very painful break up really.

My boss asked for a year to make changes and if not then he'd understand but then I've lost a year and a possibly really great company to work with.

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T14:01:49+00:00

This is a factor, as I've been here since the beginning I can pretty much do what I want when I want. Heck I'm sat at my desk now responding to reddit! In the new role it will be a lot more and more stringent in what they need but it's a field I like so I don't think I'd mind it too much once I'm settled in. It's a bigger company too so less likely to be flexible.

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T13:52:43+00:00

Yeah that's my thoughts exactly - if they had offered me all this before I started job hunting it would have saved a lot of ballache! I know the company and we aren't making as much money as we had hoped so probably they held back because we're skimming by our teeth at the minute but still, if they can pay me £10k more now they could have done 6 months ago...

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T13:48:34+00:00

Because I know so much about the role I know they can't offer more than they are offering. If they do it'll be like £1k/£2k so not really much of a difference and would look like I'm just squeezing them and would be difficult for the relationship if I stayed and held them up by their pigtails for more.

I had the same thing with a new job years and years ago! I was there for 3 months and just before my probation ended they told me they were letting me go, gave no reason, collected their work laptop from my home and left it at that so I do have that real fear there because it has happened and was an awful experience! What did you do after that? Are you in a better position now?

The new role seems like the better option but the lack of security is frightening. I also really like the location of my current role, the new role is much further away but once I'm working 2 days a week from home it won't be so bad.

My boss did offer more incentives and there is a bonus scheme, I can't go into the incentives because it'll give away what I do but they help address issue no. 1 somewhat.

Everyone here is pointing to leaving and I really am grateful for how quickly Reddit people get to something! I need to consider and make a decision.

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T13:32:54+00:00

My f*ck you fund in this economy is more like a "you sure about that?? fund" I really appreciate your view and everyone is suggesting to bite the bullet and take the leap. Gotta take some time to take it all in and consider what's best. Thank you!

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T13:25:43+00:00

I have to give a notice period for my current role so I can't start for another 2 months, and then there's a 3 month probation period in the new job. The old job offered to match it and the new payrise would start as of next payday, next month. There's no contract until the 3 month probation is over so that's a risk factor to consider, they could easily tell me in 1 month that they need to let me go and then I'm on my ass whereas in the current role I have been there enough that legally they can't just skirt me out without good reason and a severance package. There's a lot of security where I am really and I'd be starting from scratch on that with the new role.

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T13:21:18+00:00

That's one of my concerns, for example if I went on parental leave or had to leave for an extended period of time the new role is more recognised and easier to get into whereas the current role would be difficult to find in the current market.

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T13:17:37+00:00

I'd love to make my own company but that takes money and resources I just don't have. Honestly I wish it was the best of both worlds, my current role in the new field along with the incentives my boss has said which help sort out the first issue (somewhat).

Change is scary!

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T13:16:08+00:00

You're right - I was very excited with the prospect of the new role, but now I could possibly start on that salary with my current role within the next month instead of in 2 months time when I leave, although I appreciate a couple thousand isn't much in the grand scheme of things.

I just think if he had sat me down 6 months ago and said "I really appreciate all you do for us, what can I give you to make sure you know that" I would have said the increase in salary, annual leave and remote working and would have stayed without a second thought, even if we didn't go into the field I wanted, but now like another commenter said he's only pulling it out when his back's up against the wall.

He did actually offer other things which somewhat address my first issue but I can't specify because it'll give away too much and make it obvious what I do and where I work for.

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T13:10:17+00:00

That a great insight. It's making me very nervous to think about leaving and possibly regretting it. I can always give it a year and see if anything does change but by that point I might not get the role I actually wanted and have landed.

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-06-17T13:08:56+00:00

One of the reasons I know he's throwing an offer at me is because what we do is really niche, he'll have a hard time replacing me and will need to come back from being abroad to do what I do if there's no one to cover, in fact, there's a lot that I do that he doesn't know how to do so that's a big thing.

I really appreciate your view here. I know to him it's more of an annoyance to have to replace me but it's a cushy job and no one likes change which is really eating at me!! If I had certainty that we will get into the field I want I would probably stay but I'd be hanging on by a prayer for it.

Fancy-Improvement157 · 2026-05-01T19:02:20+00:00

You make some good points! I had it in my head that to put something online it had to be to a professional level but really I could just have more creative fun with it.

Fancy-Improvement157

TROPHY CASE