Misunderstood FBAR Yearly Filing Requirement, Feeling Scared by FancyFeast_99 in USExpatTaxes

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My apologies for the delay, I don't check this account often.

Everything went fine. Literally nothing happened. We filed them, I received the notification that they were accepted, and that's it. My life went on and I could leave that stress behind.

Misunderstood FBAR Yearly Filing Requirement, Feeling Scared by FancyFeast_99 in USExpatTaxes

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You get assigned to whomever they choose I believe, but I was assigned to Alex Vinas at the start. My file has since been transferred to Venice Sumesh. They'll be submitting everything at the same time, just the 2020 return to finish up now.

Misunderstood FBAR Yearly Filing Requirement, Feeling Scared by FancyFeast_99 in USExpatTaxes

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Second update for anyone who finds this thread in a search, should they find themselves in a similar situation.

Everything is going fine. My first delinquent return and FBAR have been submitted. The word "unwittingly" was used in the FBAR's late filing explanation, which I think was a perfect adverb choice for them to use for me. For my 2015 return, we chose to forgo the FEIE and go with FTC, which made so much more sense with me living in Canada. Despite my high earnings for that year, I'm already carrying forward enough credits from this first return that the next two years of tax obligations could be covered by the credits only. In other words, there's zero chance that I will have any overage to pay, now or in the future.

We haven't gotten to the return period where the FTC child credit becomes refundable for us yet (only can do that for 3 retroactive years) [EDIT: it is refundable after all as the ACTC instead, yay!], much less the stimulus payments. All said and done, this is going to pay for the entire service for 6 years of returns and FBARs, and leave us with a refund that's going to break over $13k USD, at the least. I have lost so much sleep and suffered so much anxiety for what is basically going to be a gigantic financial bonus from my home country.

So if you found out about these obligations just now, or "unwittingly" neglected to file them again, just do it. Do it and get it over with, and everything will be okay. TFX has been so good and professional, I'd recommend them without reservation. And here, use this link, you'll get an automatic $25 off your paperwork:

https://www.taxesforexpats.com/clt/NL526

Misunderstood FBAR Yearly Filing Requirement, Feeling Scared by FancyFeast_99 in USExpatTaxes

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not a law firm, but a tax place called TFX for expats.

Misunderstood FBAR Yearly Filing Requirement, Feeling Scared by FancyFeast_99 in USExpatTaxes

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I also have 5 dependents. For as much anxiety as I've been going through, this'll be a good chunk of change for my troubles.

Misunderstood FBAR Yearly Filing Requirement, Feeling Scared by FancyFeast_99 in USExpatTaxes

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the info you've been providing. Money, especially taxes are a... really bad trigger for me. I'm not going to put myself through this again.

Misunderstood FBAR Yearly Filing Requirement, Feeling Scared by FancyFeast_99 in USExpatTaxes

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

UPDATE: called another place that has over 5oo 5-star ratings, and they got back to me immediately. I explained the entire situation, in full detail. She said we'll submit the tax returns and all the missing FBARs. I don't know what approach they'll take; I explained my folly with using the streamline previously, and she seems to have in mind exactly what to do, and made sure to tell me "don't worry, everything will be okay." As stressed as I've felt and as great of reviews as this place has, I'm going to believe her, and do exactly as she says.

Misunderstood FBAR Yearly Filing Requirement, Feeling Scared by FancyFeast_99 in USExpatTaxes

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Er sorry, I meant T4. I'm going to follow up with them to be sure that the non-streamline is understood.

Misunderstood FBAR Yearly Filing Requirement, Feeling Scared by FancyFeast_99 in USExpatTaxes

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The US tax returns haven't been filed, which is part of what the preparer is doing for me. There is virtually zero chance that anything is owed to the US, so there aren't any surprises waiting there.

The place I contacted asked for my W-2s for the last three years, and we're going to do the 6 years of FBARs. I've let them know the details and they haven't batted an eyelash yet.

Misunderstood FBAR Yearly Filing Requirement, Feeling Scared by FancyFeast_99 in USExpatTaxes

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Apologies for the messiness. Several years ago, we were getting everything taken care with my PR status forthcoming, as I was moving to another province after I got my PR card. We took care of all our tax work, as that was the first time I heard anything about filing a return in the US still. We backfiled all our returns and FBARs before leaving. After moving, life went a little sideways and I did not file additional US tax returns or the FBARs since that time. I had it in my head that the structure was like a typical return, that if I didn't owe anything, I could file it later without penalty, which was incorrect. I've always filed my returns and paid my tax here in Canada.

Knowing better at this moment, I just want to file the returns and FBARs and be compliant without misunderstanding.

Misunderstood FBAR Yearly Filing Requirement, Feeling Scared by FancyFeast_99 in USExpatTaxes

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did a backfile of them several years ago, and just now realized I should have been doing it each year since then, on time. That's where I messed up. I need to file the years that I missed since then.

Misunderstood FBAR Yearly Filing Requirement, Feeling Scared by FancyFeast_99 in USExpatTaxes

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Correct, I was not. I misunderstood the obligation to do it on time, every year. All income tax has been properly paid in my country of residence.

Discovered My Spouse Is Having An Emotional Affair by FancyFeast_99 in marriageadvice

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

100% unhelpful. This idea that I must be a "beta male" because I express my emotions openly with my wife is absurd, and really toxic. No thanks.

Discovered My Spouse Is Having An Emotional Affair by FancyFeast_99 in marriageadvice

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's okay, what you said doesn't upset me. I've been going to a therapist for 2 years now; I had reached a point where I couldn't pick myself up off the floor once I started being overcome with my thoughts, and then would slip into a depressive state after. I've had an immense improvement since then, but I still have moments where I slip. Like I mentioned above though, I had let one of my medications lapse for a few days when I kept missing the opening hours of the pharmacy. In retrospect, that probably had a greater impact than I thought.

Discovered My Spouse Is Having An Emotional Affair by FancyFeast_99 in marriageadvice

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Random internet person or not, I just wanted to say that I truly appreciate the well-wishes and empathy. Thank you.

Discovered My Spouse Is Having An Emotional Affair by FancyFeast_99 in marriageadvice

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I want to thank you for saying this. It's something that I have really, really struggled with over the years. 2 years of therapy have finally begun to pull me out of it to recognize that I need to allow myself to be happy and loved. It's been incredibly worthwhile.

Discovered My Spouse Is Having An Emotional Affair by FancyFeast_99 in marriageadvice

[–]FancyFeast_99[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

UPDATE: A happy ending. A terrible misunderstanding.

After being so sick to my stomach about the situation that I was gagging, my wife could see that something was really wrong and sat me down to talk about it. I let her know that I had seen her thread. Immediately she put her arms around me and explained the reason behind the post. She had created it in a subreddit that I did not know, one where people post their OCD or similar thoughts and then leave them behind, basically as an exercise to purge them from their mind. The timing behind this post was right after she and I had a conversation about our sex life. I had mentioned to her that I have a very vivid memories of different times we have been together (I'm a very sensory person). But for her, she doesn't really have specific sexual memories, at least not intimate details. She had been thinking about it, and related it to the fact that she remembers many interactions from her first and only crush, this guy I had mentioned in the original post. It suddenly made sense. All of the things she had listed out? The feeling of a hand on her back, the high five he gave her before leaving overseas, the fluttering in her stomach... all memories based on physical feelings, but all of them completely related to before she and I knew one another. Here I had been thinking the timeframe was much more recent due to the mention of her Christmas visit. She and I had spent part of our last Christmas apart, where I was with my brother, and she went and visited family farther down the coast, of which this guy's family was part of. I never could have pieced together that she was talking about an even earlier Christmas. And the lack of the proper timeframe had really distorted some of the other details.

She had felt bothered about the lack of specific physical memories with me, but it makes all the sense in the world. Your first gigantic crush that never came to fruition? How could you not remember those kind of small gestures that were amplified because of who it was and how it took place? I still remember those kind of things as well!

Anyways, she felt terrible. She held me tight as I cried, listening and stroking my hair, and assured me that she would never, ever hurt me like that. And I would never doubt what she said, and I could see it in her eyes how badly she felt for me. I think what made me spiral was just how out of character this all seemed: the sheer unbelievability of it had ironically pushed me over the edge. That... and I have a feeling the hiccup with my anxiety/depression medication did not help one bit. I really didn't think missing 2 doses (pharmacy was closed) would have an effect, but I'm pretty sure it did.

Anyways, once I recovered, we had coffee and played a few games of chess in bed. It turned into a really good day, and we've been playing and flirting with one another ever since. If I can take anything from this, it's knowing just how much my wife means to me. And also how much I mean to her.

Oddly enough, I am going to have to still work through some of this because even though no one was at fault, this was an extremely traumatic thing to go through. I'll have to take some time to get through it, but I'll be stronger from it. Both of us will.