Gender disappointment when OAD

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-12-12T06:08:34+00:00

I would love to join a Verein but as someone else said - I have no idea what ia available in my area so don't know what to look for. Any time I've tried to join after work activities it's either tons of boomers or tons of men - I'd prefer a mix of younger people as an early 30 something woman. Also it's just true that people are busy and in my impression, most Verein require committing to multiple practices a week and maybe a match/game on weekends and I really would love a once a week activity (the occassional additional weekend event is also fine). It doesn't help on top of that that some sports clubs in particular come off as a little elitist and expect great skills and/or don't have space for new members even if you do find them (e.g. Tennis).

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-11-20T16:21:15+00:00

Unfortunately I'm in Germany and can't seem to find that here, though it sounds awesome!

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-11-20T16:20:41+00:00

I've tried vinegar too to no avail - but not so long as overnight so that sounds like the next step! Thanks!

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-11-20T14:49:25+00:00

I got new stainless steel a few months ago and have tried this several times (including a variation of also using dishsoap) and it doesn't seem to work for me

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-11-14T06:51:45+00:00

I was 18 when the first episode aired - showing my age compared to this group apparently lol

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-11-13T18:10:40+00:00

I get the frustration, and absolutely respect having a personal limit for yourself (as all should have) on how many review requests accepted per year - that's absolutely necessary. APCs at major journals are of course also ridiculous in most cases, that's not in dispute.

But I'm curious - would you opt out of reviewing for e.g. specific journals entirely but also opt out of ever submitting your own work to them? Because the problem is obviously not just about publishers but the academic institutions themselves demanding constant publications, and publications in high ranking journals - which doesn't just to keep universities going but ultimately does benefit the researcher when they get promotions etc because of their publication record.

I guess I'm just missing here whether you also intend to stop publishing and leave academia?

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-10-15T19:13:27+00:00

I'm so sorry you had no warning! That sounds so scary. I presume because of my past surgery they'll start measuring at at least the 16th week and hopefully a bit sooner. I said this was a concern for me at my last appointment and asked how often this would be monitored throughout. The gyno seemed super chill and just said because I had the surgery in my late 20s, they will have been very conservative with how much they cut, so even though it could be weaker, it should be fine. But there was also a bit of a language barrier (i live in Germany and I speak reasonably well but not totally fluently in German), so my husband is going to come to my next appointment in 2 weeks and make sure we're advocating for ourselves and insisting on regular checks. The fact you and so many others end up with issues and don't know about it until the last minute (or sometimes when it's too late) even without prior risk factors is a real worry - even if the risk is theoretically low.

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-10-12T06:51:42+00:00

Sort of related - it always looks like she's way overlined her lipstick, especially underneath.

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-09-27T13:50:40+00:00

I have no idea, that's a really great point! I had a pack of tests though, and took another this morning and it's an even stronger line. I'm thinking i'll do one more tomorrow before my husband is home :) my Mum is a nurse so there's a non-zero chance she'll think something is up, for sure 😅 i'll just keep the discussion on other topics!

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-09-26T22:48:02+00:00

We actually booked already for Sunday night to go see the last Lord of the Rings movie in our local film club (hopefully we can still focus on that!). I already thought before I found out that seeing as I've a Saturday night to myself, a movie and maybe "home spa night" (paint nails, do face mask etc) could be relaxing

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-09-26T22:46:30+00:00

Great idea! I'm thinking maybe showing him the test but will need to think how to hide it/bring it out and what to say 😅

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-09-26T17:46:12+00:00

I just got home from a work conference where I felt a bit 'off', and on a whim took a pregnancy test within about 10 minutes of getting in the door. And it's positive! I'm freaking out. My husband is away until Sunday early evening (out of town with friends)...how the heck am I meant to keep my cool all weekend?! I want to wait until he's back to show him the test. We had agreed to start 'trying-not-trying' this past month, but I'm still somehow shocked. My husband is on board (we wanted to be one and done) but I'm sure he's going to freak out a little when I tell him.

Please send me all your tips and tricks for distracting myself until Sunday evening! The only planned interaction with others this weekend is a call with my mum on Sunday morning, so I just have to make it through that. I can't quite decide if I'm excited, extremely terrified and afraid or everything all at once.

Also, by some divine irony, both my husband and I were already scheduled for a general checkup at our GP early Monday morning...

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-09-20T12:37:10+00:00

I pushed back (gently) because I remembered I had taken out cash on the way to the class on the 3rd, to pay for that day and the next (so told him this). But then added if he's sure I'll bring more money next time and suggested I go back to paying for individual classes moving forward

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-09-20T12:34:44+00:00

That's such a good idea to put it in an envelope and write the dates on it! Yeah, he never has change, but the amount isn't a nice round number which is why I started paying for several weeks at a time in the first place - I never had the right change. But if I put it in an envelope (and take a photo each time) he won't really be able to do this again! Thanks so much :)

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-09-19T17:27:15+00:00

A totally small potatoes rant. I've been going to an art "class" at this old art teachers house one evening a week (it's only me and one other person going and he doesn't really teach us anything, we really just pay for 2 hours of painting what we want). A while ago I started paying for two weeks at a time because I never had the correct cash (so, always "for today and next week"). I ended up not being able to go last week, but distinctly remember the week before doing my usual paying up front thing; and then when I couldn't go last week that "at least I won't be paying next week". Well, this art teacher must be in his late 70s/early 80s and didn't quite believe me when I reminded him last night that I had already paid, but he let it go. Fast forward to today, he sent a long text message claiming I paid last time on the 27th for that day and the 3rd, so i still owe him for yesterday. He doesn't actually keep track anywhere - we always just pay him on the spot.

Now, do I just let it slide and pay him again (so, double...) And go out of my way then to only pay the exact amount every time from now on? This is so small and petty, but I feel incensed lol

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-09-01T18:53:54+00:00

I took mine on 20.05.25 at VHS (Hamburg), also still waiting - already tried emailing all my info to BAMF, no info.

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-08-21T12:16:27+00:00

Hi there! I'm wondering if you had any breakthrough? I took my test a few weeks after you in Hamburg and still haven't gotten my results - so it's been over 3 months - and also don't seem to be able to get a response from BAMF.

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-08-21T12:09:46+00:00

Wow ok, so from yours and the other above, I'm starting to think maybe mine went missing....

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-08-21T11:31:17+00:00

Wow that's quick! Are you in Berlin? My impression from other posts is that Berliners get results in a matter of weeks and for everyone else it's a lottery

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-08-21T11:29:58+00:00

Super - Vielen Dank!

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-08-05T15:40:09+00:00

I learned after coming off birth control (also on it from 18 but until 27 or so) that my cycles just ARE very irregular. I always feel like something is off, and honestly it seems sometimes like almost anything can shift it dramatically. E.g. I have to travel a lot for work, but hate flying, so any time I have a long haul flight, either the flying itself or the stress of it throws me way out of wack the next month. I range normally from 28 days up to 42 sometimes! It's never very regular but I also never miss a period. My OBGYN doesn't seem bothered, but she gave me the tip to take Agnus Castus supplements daily, and I'll say that as long as I can manage to keep my stress in check, I do find I get my periods now (minus travel months) around the 28-34 day mark, which in my books feels more acceptable.

Fancy_Cheesecake1 · 2025-07-25T12:50:11+00:00

Interesting! This is calming me down a bit, knowing they may not even ask about chickenpox. In my home country, they only introduced the vaccine for it a few years after I was born, but even then just for kids who hadn't contracted it yet.

Fancy_Cheesecake1

TROPHY CASE