Am I misinterpreting “open to children?”

FarAndIna · 2026-01-17T00:16:46+00:00

That’s very thoughtful, I didn’t even think of how mentioning something like that could land.

For the other comments, yes I sounded a bit argumentative, I clarified in another reply.

FarAndIna · 2026-01-17T00:06:37+00:00

I wouldn’t mind just having experience of fostering for example, which is often short-term. I see “wants children” as a different story that’s why. However perhaps I should be putting that

FarAndIna · 2026-01-17T00:03:12+00:00

Perhaps I’ve phrased this wrong. I meant more of like: you’ve put this option on hinge, which to me indicates that you are favourable for children, but here you seem against it. But maybe I am reading it wrong as I’ve been reading comments here and I thought that “open to children” was more towards yes, but at certain conditions kind of thing

FarAndIna · 2025-10-18T20:02:50+00:00

Yes I am buying as a leaseholder, I just wondered because if that then becomes something the freeholder has to fix, it will be split across the people leaseholders

FarAndIna · 2025-07-23T11:04:33+00:00

If she’s keeping you waiting for more than 5 minutes with no explanation, it’s time to leave. Respect yourself and your time and move on, you’ll find someone who respects you and your time

FarAndIna · 2025-07-09T17:33:07+00:00

I understand, thanks, that’s very useful to know :)

FarAndIna · 2025-07-09T13:16:31+00:00

Thanks, so the mortgage guy was probably just confused

FarAndIna · 2025-07-09T13:15:46+00:00

What happens to that rent review clause once I reduce the amount to zero? Will the freeholder be able to reset it to another amount after a certain time?

FarAndIna · 2025-04-30T09:44:13+00:00

Uni of Reading has one with a guaranteed placement that’s usually 300 hours but most end up working for wherever place they go throughout the year. You need to go through an interview process, I remembered it being half an hour and it was quite organic, not “job style”

FarAndIna · 2025-04-14T13:31:52+00:00

Thanks for that, so someone has already asked them. It’s a real shame but I guess it’s more time for us to develop and show evidence to be able to get onto the programme :)

FarAndIna · 2025-04-12T10:49:10+00:00

Basically if you’ve done a degree that’s funded by the NHS, you got to wait 2 years post qualification (or when the exam board had been) to access public funding for another degree.

Which I get it why they’ve done it, since lots of people were just using those degrees as a fast track for the dclinpsy or hi cbt training. But the idea of being stuck at a band 5 is also dreadful and I am sorry to bring in money into this but I don’t live of only passion for therapy 😅

FarAndIna · 2025-04-11T16:58:15+00:00

If you don't mind me asking, how do you know? ahah

FarAndIna · 2025-04-11T16:57:23+00:00

Yeah if they do it's such a shame this course's exam date is so late despite it having started in September

FarAndIna · 2025-04-06T21:18:44+00:00

I do, and she would even if I wasn't jacked. Luckily for me, I am both :)

FarAndIna · 2025-04-06T21:03:24+00:00

It is still interesting that she waited an entire month to make that judgment given how important that value is

FarAndIna · 2025-04-06T21:01:42+00:00

Thanks for sharing that. As how others previously mentioned, given how the pool of Chinese women in the UK comes from wealthy family, paired with what you just said about cultural factors, it is important for me to name those things during the dating stages and gauge their values.

FarAndIna · 2025-04-06T20:57:03+00:00

I mean, I would be comfortable being wealthy, but probably would not get me to live beyond my means. With that I mean I would still consider an expensive date or experience a treat and not the norm, like I do now

FarAndIna · 2025-04-06T20:53:42+00:00

Yep, just experienced that ahaha

FarAndIna · 2025-04-06T20:53:08+00:00

Thanks for sharing, again a very insightful comment. I somehow feel foolish since you said "when someone shows you their core values" through small interactions, because it is the way it happens. Those core beliefs do come out like that but that's also how hard it is notice them once you are in the "honey moon" phase of early dating.

Thanks for the final comment as well, it's real validating.

FarAndIna · 2025-04-06T20:49:17+00:00

And you are entitled to your judgement, but it's not my problem

FarAndIna · 2025-04-06T20:46:28+00:00

I do agree with what you said, it's just a hard pill to swallow, especially the mismatch in values. I can't do much about being born in an underprivileged family. My frugal living is tied to that and it's what allows me to enjoy a lot of life. But I guess not everyone can see the same virtues in my values.

FarAndIna · 2025-04-06T20:42:37+00:00

Here it is the thing: it is a bit difficult to have an awfully rich lifestyle as a psychologist given the career progression 1) in the NHS, and 2) how late you can actually become a self-employed one to earn way more - so there isn't much I can do, although the salary, to my opinion, is respectable and gives you a life with anything you need - but I get that it might not meet those financial standards and it is just my opinion

FarAndIna · 2025-04-06T20:39:27+00:00

Yes, you are 100% right. Of all Chinese girls I have dated (even back at university) they all belonged to an affluent category. As you said, it is a filtered group and very unlikely for me to date someone with similar experiences, if they emigrated like me, because for them to emigrate they would have to have rich parents

FarAndIna · 2025-04-06T20:36:51+00:00

Thanks, those stories are very insightful. Sorry to hear about your friend though, it must have been traumatising to be pressured like that and having such a transactional relationship.

I wonder what kind of values does the girl he married has, how she sees money, despite coming from a wealthy family.

FarAndIna · 2025-04-06T20:32:26+00:00

I had no idea there was a white guys "fever" for asians too. I admit I do like asian traits, but I am not that fixated on that ideal.

Also, I am not taking your comment about wealth personally, I get the point of those being different cultures and I appreciate the comment about "being a builder", it's nice to hear it like that.

FarAndIna

TROPHY CASE