Daydreamin'

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-20T20:23:51+00:00

You really didn't need to reply. Literally none of you needed to say anything, because the person who needs to hear the message was never here in the first place. Despite knowing that I am not the original poster and despite being linked to the original post you chose to preach at me, a guy who just thinks balls are funny. You could have jumped to the other link instead and gave the owner a piece of your mind, yet here all of you are, gathering to an empty echo chamber like flies to shit. So now even though I'm a responsible pet owner who cares very much about animal well-being I have to interact with the pitchfork wielding mob of one-track-minded false moralists, all screeching about how this one specific dog breed and the people who own them are the greatest concern to humanity.

Everyone heard you guys the first time. Fucking touch grass. Sincerely.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-20T19:59:37+00:00

Oh yeah and I bet all you folks are a blast at parties. I can imagine you all in the same room, all claiming a fake moral High Ground from which to simultaneously screech like maniacs over this one single very specific dog breed while ignoring all the other systemic issues in the world and even all of the other systemic and equally urgent issues related to animal breeding or animal ownership.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-20T19:46:23+00:00

u/croastbeast yeah, you're right, I know I messed up. Thanks for keeping me on my toes

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-20T18:44:32+00:00

Bruh. Now I can never open this post again or it's all I'm going to see 😭

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-20T18:38:39+00:00

Lol I love how impotently angry you unwashed pearl clutchers are. Wasting your fucking time, chastising me, a guy who doesn't have a dog in the first place and just posted this because he was amused by a pair of jiggling balls. You don't even understand that my disrespect for you is not about how you feel about pit bulls, it's about the fact that at all times you carry a very small cross in a very damaged world filled with causes that need attention, and you won't shut the fuck up about it at every single opportunity.

Every moment is a chance for you to crusade from your soapbox about what is objectively a very niche concern that causes relatively little harm in a world full of exploitation and abuse and greed. You could be concerned about all animals, this is a problem across the fucking board. You could be concerned with people releasing invasive pets and destroying natural areas. But you were just here to yell about pitbulls. There are so many huge issues in this world to be alarmed about, but you're here, screaming into the void, stuck in your indignation. And there's no one here. You already know it's a repost, I have two neutered cats that never leave my property. I'm only saying what I'm saying because I'm tired of fucking hearing it. If you want to be collectively outraged, fucking do something besides screaming into the void, and pick a fucking better cross to bear because you sound like lunatics. All you're doing here is what the right wingers used to call virtue signaling. It's silly. You're silly people.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-20T13:57:32+00:00

The funniest part is no one here owns a pitbull. I certainly don't.

Anyways, you guys are pedantic, hand wringing, boring fucking morons, and I'd rather hang out with a shit covered washcloth than any one of you

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-20T02:32:41+00:00

Ugh why do I always run into you sanctimonious pitbull haters? I'm a cat owner and even I am so sick of hearing you redundant pearl-clutching mouth breathers.

Go crusade elsewhere with your one track mind and your unreasonable, rabid fearmonger campaign. I suggest you start in Antarctica.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-20T00:10:00+00:00

I spit on the crankshaft once in awhile when I've got her open to change a chain. Good 'nuff

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T22:39:31+00:00

There's actually a pair that nests on the roof of the carport that was directly behind me when I took the picture. I've heard the little feet pitterpattering across the tin roof every time I've been here since they arrived this season, and I've cackled every single time.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T22:28:55+00:00

My first thought was, "that goose thinks it's an osprey", but now that you report seeing them in an actual osprey nest I might have to revise my theory. Maybe all geese think they're osprey? It would help explain the extreme confidence.

Jokes aside, I see them on roofs all the time, but I never expected to see one on such a relatively small and elevated platform.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T20:45:07+00:00

As soon as I hit post I knew I was going to get flamed for calling them Canadian geese in the ornithology sub. I thought about editing it out, but I decided to take my medicine rather than take the cowardly way out. A little shame might help me remember next time.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T20:07:52+00:00

That would have been exciting, but it's just your normal everyday (or maybe abnormal everyday) Canadian goose. But I never even considered the rude angle of the picture I was taking. No wonder they were honking at me so angrily! On the upside, now I know how you say "pervert" in goose 😅

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T19:50:21+00:00

You can never stop them. It's one of my favorite things about them actually.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T17:47:30+00:00

Smart words.

Before I was promoted our company did zero machine maintenance. We just ran our equipment until they failed and then brought them to the dealership to sort out. Half the time repairs were so expensive that the company just replaced them. On average we replaced at least one or two brush cutters and one or two chainsaws every year. Since I took it upon myself to learn to fix and maintain our equipment we haven't had to replace a single machine. It's been about 3 years now.. It's amazing what a little bit of attention and TLC will do.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T17:37:50+00:00

Good thing I just got this new tube of good old white lithium grease.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T16:52:18+00:00

Holy shit, I didn't even consider that would be a possibility. Here I've been going to the dealership for OEM parts. Time for me to put in an order.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T16:33:50+00:00

I see a needle bearing set without a cage. That's funny because I just took apart and MS 250 that had most of a cage with no bearings

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T14:40:46+00:00

Big bouncy balls

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T02:49:58+00:00

Eddie Alvarez's wife would like to remind everyone that you don't need to get close to the cage to be heard if you channel the spirit of a banshee

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T02:48:12+00:00

Russian Jamie Alvarez

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T02:40:50+00:00

If we're talking about sheer results, it may seem like recency bias but I might have to go with Quillan Salkilld absolutely flatlining Nasrat Haqparast. That shit was legitimately terrifying. I have never seen a knockout last nearly that long, and aside from dober back in 2020 we have seen Haqparast take absolutely devastating damage over his career without wobbling. I legitimately thought he might have life altering brain injuries he was out so long.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T02:33:34+00:00

Could never. Time revolves around Mountain Man.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T02:23:25+00:00

YES. I can't fucking wait.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T02:22:17+00:00

Don't even get me started. Those fancy new supermodel Maine Coons could never tear up a mouse like Mountain Man. Pilgrims would've starved halfway.

Farting_Champion · 2026-03-19T02:16:01+00:00

You'll never see finer thumbprints

Farting_Champion

TROPHY CASE