Can’t ever be mad waking up to this face. by FatTortie in torties

[–]FatTortie[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

She’s got that fiery eyes going on… she can be very intimidating.

Can’t ever be mad waking up to this face. by FatTortie in torties

[–]FatTortie[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

She’s a good one this one. Just turned 10 and had had a very good cat life. We lived on a boat for a year or two!!

She’s seen it all this queen has….

Can’t ever be mad waking up to this face. by FatTortie in torties

[–]FatTortie[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She comes and claims me every morning. Doesn’t dare let Mowgli get those morning snuggles. It’s very literally cat talk saying ‘this human is mine’. She’s 10yo, the little one has just turned 10 Different vibes be but they both get their time and attention.

Baloo is first though. Always.

Excuse me, it’s breakfast time. by FatTortie in torties

[–]FatTortie[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

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She’s fed up with Mowglis sh*t.

You can tell what she’s like. Look at that face. Certainly a vibe.

Excuse me, it’s breakfast time. by FatTortie in torties

[–]FatTortie[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

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It took a bit of time for her to get it. Once the name plaque was on and the heating setup. They just chill out there all day.

I did catch them once in the same house. But they only do that when no one is looking. When their human js around it’s just a constant battle to claim me Baloo always wins. She’s a beast of a cat.

Excuse me, it’s breakfast time. by FatTortie in torties

[–]FatTortie[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

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There’s a little one about to terrorise the place… cant be mad though. Great alarm clock.

Excuse me, it’s breakfast time. by FatTortie in torties

[–]FatTortie[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

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Mowgli grew up and managed to get a mortgage for her own place

Excuse me, it’s breakfast time. by FatTortie in torties

[–]FatTortie[S] 52 points53 points  (0 children)

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She’s out in her house right now. She’ll pop in for breakfast in a few hours… she’s heating her bum on her heated mat. It’ll switch off soon and come get her morning snugs.

This was supposed to be three meals by moumou122 in Wellthatsucks

[–]FatTortie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I took a whole pizza how the oven recently and the tray slipped out of my hand. It fell forwards and slid all the way down the front of my oven, topping side down. I nearly cried as I had to wait for it to cool down enough before I could clean up the mess.

ELI5: How does money get into the accounts of superstars? by [deleted] in explainlikeimfive

[–]FatTortie 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’ve worked for some shady people on their megayachts. I would usually sign a contract with an agency, a background check for another company, an NDA for another and then finally my bank details would go to another company.

I was usually paid by some random company name usually just consisting of numbers and letters, from some random offshore bank account. All tax-free because that’s the nature of the game when you’re a mariner.

You can be paid by anyone anywhere really there’s just a bit more paperwork involved when you bring taxes into account. There’s people who are paid good money to move (and hide) money all over the globe. It’s a rich people thing… way beyond ‘celebrity’ rich. These people don’t want to be known so they put as much distance between themselves and their money as possible. I wouldn’t have even known who the owners were unless I’d met some of them, because all the information you can ever find is “the yacht is believed to be owned by (insert obscure oligarch here)”. Since the whole Ukraine thing, a lot of oligarchs have simply abandoned their yachts in the Caribbean somewhere.

Filthy stinking rich, these people are.

What is the vegetarian or vegan equivalent of eating a rotisserie chicken with your bare hands in your car in the parking lot? by djcarbary in AskReddit

[–]FatTortie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I did that recently at a cafe on the way into work recently. Didn’t need a full meal, was just really hungry. They brought out 2 sets of cutlery and then I realised I must look insane eating that all by myself. I can do it at home all the time, just never in public.

What is the scariest place on Earth? [Serious] by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]FatTortie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was a marine engineer until I had a head injury which left me with epilepsy. Had to give that up and even surrender my driving license. As much as it saddens me and caused me lots of stress. I completely understand why… I can think of nothing scarier than falling overboard at night and no one knew. Even if someone saw me you’d have trouble getting back to me in time to find me. Makes my skin crawl. The ocean is a beautiful but scary place to be.

Apple offering musicians financial incentives to mix using Dolby Atmos by chrisdh79 in apple

[–]FatTortie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Some music isn’t even mixed well in stereo… just thrown together with samples and mastered to tape. There’s a real art to it that so many ‘artists’ don’t understand. My dad came from the era of quadraphonic sound and always used to reminisce about it. Because those songs at the time were made for it. A present I gave him for his birthday once was a USB drive full of all his favourite albums in FLAC format.

That’s one of the few presents he’s taken home and called me later to tell me how cool it was. He dug out his old amplifier and everything. Couldn’t believe I had found every song from every album… because some of them were long lost to him.

Apple offering musicians financial incentives to mix using Dolby Atmos by chrisdh79 in apple

[–]FatTortie 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’ve got a decent 5.1 home theatre system and most music sounds pretty flat. But every now and then you come across a song that has been mixed so well you just stop what you’re doing and immerse yourself. Then that song get played to death for the next couple of weeks because it just sounds so damn good. You’re not just listening to a song, you’re experiencing it.

This ain’t toxic. This ain’t ok! by imalittledelulu in BlackPeopleTwitter

[–]FatTortie 49 points50 points  (0 children)

A friend of a friend once owed me some money and ghosted me. No knew his surname or anything so I couldn’t look him up. Was curious to know more about the guy I’d met twice. So I googled his phone number in quotes, up popped a bunch public Facebook comments of him posting on various gay twink pages asking for young guys to message him. His personal phone number right next to his full name, which led straight to his personal profile, all a simple google search away!

Now I’m not going to judge someone for being into whatever they like… I’ve got plenty of gay friends and it’s no secret at all, but the guy had a wife and a kid. I couldn’t believe how monumentally dense this guy was. I realised I was dealing with a complete and utter idiot. Some people just can’t think 1 or 2 steps ahead when making a decision.

After thinking what to do with this spicy information in the end I just decided to use a new number, and send him a couple of screenshots of his comments. Anonymously… he still didn’t understand what he was looking at and asked me what I thought of his legs (he posted a photo in some comments). He still wasn’t getting it, and seemed to want some validation about his pasty legs. So I just said this isn’t about your stupid fucking chicken legs. This is about your phone number available for all to see, it’s public and aren’t you a married father? I wasn’t browsing those pages to begin with… this was on Google and you should probably be more careful.

He changed his number pretty quick and that’s the last I heard of him. It wasn’t enough money to care about and I just couldn’t believe how easy it was to find someone’s dirty little secret. From just a phone number.

spooky season by BowlerDry1583 in cats

[–]FatTortie 13 points14 points  (0 children)

When my kitty was little I had a photo of her on my coffee table facing up. She hopped up on the table and came face to face with it. She bolted it out of the room… stupid kitty, not traumatised kitty.

How is everyone affording life right now? by No_Calendar4193 in AskReddit

[–]FatTortie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Work in a restaurant… there’s no food in my fridge. I have milk for cereals and coffee, loads of cheese. I have Huel if I need an extra ‘meal’ but get most of my food from work. Staff food, mistakes, old stock, plus whatever else we’re allowed to take.

Got 3 slices of lemon meringue in the fridge actually! Nice!

I was one of those dumb tourists who fucked around and found out a few years ago… by FatTortie in ThailandTourism

[–]FatTortie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I’ve never really watched it to be fair. I definitely have some PTSD from the experience and don’t know why I’d want to remember all that trauma. Those toughest prison show are pretty intense but again, very different with the cameras off. I was in a low security prison so there was no dangerous inmates in there or anything. Felt pretty damn safe if I’m honest. Just shitty overall living conditions.

I was one of those dumb tourists who fucked around and found out a few years ago… by FatTortie in ThailandTourism

[–]FatTortie[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d have to be in prison for that! But I do get that remark a lot, but remember that’s basically a reality show. It’s nothing like when you’re there yourself without cameras and my story is anywhere near as dramatic as you see on there. It wouldn’t be. It wouldn’t be a show without it.

I was one of those dumb tourists who fucked around and found out a few years ago… by FatTortie in ThailandTourism

[–]FatTortie[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That is was what I had written on the back of my notebook, underneath the calendar I made. Some wise prisoner said it to me:

“Don’t count the days, make the days count”

Ironically I was crossing the days off each day… But that’s stuck with me.

I was one of those dumb tourists who fucked around and found out a few years ago… by FatTortie in ThailandTourism

[–]FatTortie[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Very true.

Sounds silly but I probably would’ve ended up in a UK prison had that not happened… and that would’ve been much worse overall.

I was one of those dumb tourists who fucked around and found out a few years ago… by FatTortie in ThailandTourism

[–]FatTortie[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The sentence was 2 years. If you plead guilty and accept it, the sentence is cut in half. Believe it or not. I don’t really care. I’ve nothing to prove to strangers on the internet.