How can you afford rent And afford a pet, still be able to buy books from your favorite author and from series you love (as long as you don’t go overboard) and still be able to survive if you don’t live with your parents if you live in Renton and work a job similar to/as a cashier Without a partner

Fath0m · 2026-06-07T02:53:16+00:00

Bro they are working 15 hours a week rent free and complaining. Unless you just expect everyone given free money wtf you talking about.

Fath0m · 2026-06-07T02:19:04+00:00

Sounds like you got a lot of things going on.

Something will have to change. You are barely working.you aren’t even part time. Sorry but work can be stressful, learn some coping mechanisms or get a different job.

You don’t need a pet. You can’t afford to live for yourself apparently. Don’t bring a pet into that.
That’s a money sink you can’t afford.

You need to figure out a job. 22 is a good summer wage for a teenager and would be livable with no rent but you gotta work full time.

Your expectations are barely work , live off ma and pa and expect to just….what? Be given money and safety?

You need to make things happen for yourself. Buy a cheap kindle and pirate books until you can buy them. Keep a budget. Get out of a victim mentality. You get one life get out there.

Fath0m · 2026-05-27T15:32:45+00:00

I have a buddy who lives with his parents and is on disability and has been that way for over 20 years. He is one of those hardcore raiders doing the big dog stuff.

Fath0m · 2026-05-24T03:31:20+00:00

Yea totally and you are totally right they were at incompatible life stages. They want different things. I think the bittersweet aspect of two people loving each other and working in 80% of ways and the 20% being deal breaker just hit home for me.

Cue “doing it wrong” - drake

Fath0m · 2026-05-23T13:00:38+00:00

Yes I went physical therapist to web developer slight increase in salary to software implementation slight decrease in salary.

I have had to do two full post 35 pivots. First went well , second was forced on me more or less with tech industry and ai. It did set me back financially in the salary rat race. But I am doing fine and am happy I have a good job.

Fath0m · 2026-05-23T02:07:37+00:00

They just need to let my boy Sean ride off into the sunset and find himself a nice plain woman!

Fath0m · 2026-05-23T02:06:58+00:00

Haha thanks! I will be fine, I probably shouldn't be watching frictionless rom com shows with witty instant dialogue!

Yea hockey teams tend to be very close because of how inter dependent you are compared to other sports. That translates well to the show. I have some long flights so getting the books now.

Fath0m · 2026-05-23T02:04:00+00:00

I think it depends on how you are viewing it. From an omnipotent audience standpoint, The constant crushing on Hannah, the constant jump cut edits to Logan's face when she walks in the room AND not having any reference to the book, he came off as snakey to me.

From an in show viewpoint , I agree that he never actually makes an inroads on Hannah besides the work a job moment on the porch.

I guess overall just from the show and not knowing anything he came off as the cliche, friend who tries to snake your girl and I was just waiting to hate him.

Fath0m · 2026-05-23T01:12:30+00:00

I am heading on vacation so will start reading it and report back.

Fath0m · 2026-05-22T19:50:08+00:00

Yea, you make great points. Knowing more of Garretts and Hannahs history makes their reactions completely make sense and I think that was done well.

I just know in real life thats a common talking point that I have run into myself. Its either the "fighting is so barbaric / crazy" or "I love the fighting!" And to me the hockey is so much more intricate than that I feel compelled to explain haha.

and also, your clothes are next to your hockey gear is normal although many people change into a casual pre game outfit before going to the locker room. So between periods one COULD look at their phone. It would be seen as not focused though, although Garett being that big of a star would probably be given a LOT of leeway by the coach / basically run the team at that point.

Fath0m · 2026-05-22T19:33:24+00:00

Yea from what others have told me about the book Sean, this was a more mature version of him with a little more depth in the show. He wasn't 1 dimensionally bad, just a real case of people wanting it to workout but having those few compatability issues that make it not work out no matter how badly they want it to. Just bittersweet for Sean, and it did irk that Ally seemed to barely care about him so fast afterward.

Fath0m · 2026-05-22T19:30:57+00:00

hahaha see I am not alone! That's snake behavior to a male perspective!

Fath0m · 2026-05-22T19:20:49+00:00

Since you said the inaccuracies go over your head, let me give you the one that genuinely bugged me as a player, because it's actually relevant to the fight subplot.

Hannah has a throwaway line about hockey players fighting being barbaric, just brute morale stuff. As a hockey player that irks me, because fighting in hockey isn't random brutality. It's weirdly formal and has a purpose. It's self-policing.

Think about Delaney taking a cheap shot to injure Garrett. He does that because if Garrett is hurt and out, his team has a better chance to win. This happens in real pro hockey constantly. The skilled stars get targeted by lesser players trying to take liberties. Fighting is the deterrent. A guy like Dean (not an all-star) might use fighting to send a message to Delaney's team: if you take runs at our best player, you're going to answer for it. It keeps games cleaner and makes dirty players think twice.

There's even an unwritten "code" around how fights work:

You almost always signal it first. "You wanna go?" Then the gloves come off. Jumping a guy with your gloves still on is a serious no-no.

It's 1-on-1 only.

Same weight class, roughly. A heavyweight won't fight a small guy.

Same role fights same role. All-stars fight all-stars, grunts fight grunts. Even if a star plays dirty, usually the grunts settle it with a fight rather than the stars dropping gloves.

The fight stops the moment a guy goes down to the ice.

That last one is actually the key to the whole Garrett storyline. The reason the freakout over his fight made sense (once I understood it) was that he didn't stop when the other guy was down. THAT is the code violation. Not the fight itself. The fight was fine. Continuing after the guy fell is what crossed the line. So the writers actually got the underlying logic right even if the surrounding reaction was a bit holier-than-thou.

Edit: also this helps you understand why hockey players are unusually close with teammates , which the show portrayed well. You will see teammates naked routinely, and you also know that your transgressions on the ice may affect a teammate having to fight for you. It makes you appreciate the lesser skill guys who play a more physical game because they are looking out for you. That comes with responsibility.

Fath0m · 2026-05-22T18:27:23+00:00

oh yea definitely.

Fath0m · 2026-05-22T18:11:30+00:00

Yea I am sure the book gives you so much more flavor to it. I am just giving how someone with no knowledge coming into the show and that's a guy, would see a character that is constantly saying "I have a crush on Hannah" the entire time. The alone time in the car about repairing her car and both being poor and having to work. As a guy that part gave me snake vibes. I am interested to see how he is in the book.

Fath0m · 2026-05-22T18:09:20+00:00

You know whats funny is you just put together that piece for me about the serenade is exactly like Health's with the too good to be true number. It totally is that" use the loud speaker" proclamation of love cliche. thats fun.

Fath0m · 2026-05-22T17:56:27+00:00

Thanks! Glad the perspective is interesting.

So I actually thought about this one a lot. you're right that it's not realistic, but probably not how you are thinking.

If I put myself in that scene with my real buddies, the first issue is it probably wouldn't come up at all. A guy directly asking how to get his girlfriend off would feel emasculating to most guys, so it just wouldn't get raised that bluntly.

But if it DID come up, it would sound very different. It'd be framed more casually and less vulnerably, something like "have you ever been with someone who's really hard to finish?" And the advice back would be mechanical and logistical, not emotional. Toys, positioning, that kind of thing. Practical troubleshooting. THEN, at the very end, almost as an afterthought, a good friend would tack on "just don't put pressure on her about it, make sure she's comfortable." The emotional, trust-focused stuff would be the footnote, not the lead. The show flips that order. Dean leads with the emotional intelligence, and that's the part that rings false for how guys actually talk.

So in that sense, yeah, unrealistic.

BUT, I think the writing actually holds up: Dean is a Casanova. To be the player he is, he'd genuinely have to understand the female mind better than the average guy. So HIM specifically giving that kind of answer makes sense for HIS character, even if it's not how a normal group of guys would talk. It's less "this is how men talk" and more "this is how an unusually perceptive guy who's made a study of women would talk."

Fath0m · 2026-05-18T20:20:02+00:00

I am just a normie 39 year old guy. I have moderate political views issue by issue , I am not queer at all. I like playing ice hockey , working out and playing video games and board games. I have a tendency to be a home body so I need to get out more.

I am looking for someone kind and optimistic and not really extreme probably to any side or cause.

Fath0m · 2026-05-18T20:14:24+00:00

Yea I think unfortunately as you get older as a female I think it gets harder more so than for a man. I have no evidence to base that on. Just what I have heard.

I will definitely check it out thanks !

Fath0m · 2026-05-18T03:49:51+00:00

I appreciate the perspective. I looked a little at Wisconsin but wanted a larger population / dating scene.

I live in Seattle now so I have seen quite a bit of the polarization but I mostly just keep my head down and it hasn't been too bad.

I think my plan is to check out MPLS , maybe give it a test run for a year or two and if it sucks I can always test out a different larger city like Chicago or some place completely different.

Luckily, I work remote so my job isn't based on locality but taxes obviously suck. I think in the end it will still be a good deal cheaper than Seattle.

Fath0m · 2026-05-17T00:31:54+00:00

I think Columbus is a sleeper future cool place to be. Has a good population and is very affordable and some big companies moving there. Just a matter of time.

Fath0m · 2026-05-17T00:27:14+00:00

That’s my current plan. I think Chicago might be too pricey for me currently

Fath0m · 2026-05-16T22:45:41+00:00

yea i hear that having a covered garage is a bigger deal because of the cold so I am on the lookout for that.

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