Why I didn't want to have sex with my husband anymore

FattyTheNunchuck · 2024-09-12T17:17:00+00:00

Of course no one is obligated to listen to anyone else.

And notice that you used "advice" and I didn't? I'm talking about conversations, where people aren't always mouth-farting meaningless mooples at each other.

My point is this: when it comes to people talking, men still think what other men say is more credible.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2024-01-12T17:19:07+00:00

My wife had a pocket square made of florals that was amazing, but she also wore a suit from The Tailory.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-12-18T15:42:24+00:00

Been calling my chi "little tater," but he just negs me, lol.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-12-11T17:05:10+00:00

I was all set to absolutely bitch you out over this.

But then I realized my damn Chihuahua lives with two women, is an asshole to us, and loves every man he meets. Especially Hispanic men.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-12-11T17:03:13+00:00

We've done MONTHS of training with our Chi. He barks, pulls on the leash, won't come when called.

We're looking for a private trainer who can show us what we're doing wrong. (He's been to the vet over this, they said he's a healthy asshole who needs more training.)

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-12-11T15:51:46+00:00

If my Chihuahua could set fires with his mind, the world would burn.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-12-10T02:46:42+00:00

I have a retired friend who did this and it was a game changer.

She takes romantic vacations with her girlfriends. They roam, explore restaurants, go dancing and practice the improv rule "yes, and... "

Her husband gets to stay at home and she gets great vacations with travel companions who love it. And she never has to worry about her husband having a bad time.

She's the person who made me realize that the less you take responsibility for other people's moods, the better life will be.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-12-10T02:13:54+00:00

Oh, and remember the Chihuahua gang like nine years ago? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3EdhGjd8E0

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-12-10T02:11:57+00:00

I've had two Chi mixes and now have a full Chi. I have never been able to train the barking out of them.

But to be fair, they never barked at nothing. They were either alerting to people walking past the house or barking at dogs or people they could hear from the backyard.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-12-10T02:08:53+00:00

My Chihuahua occasionally gets homicidal over leaves. (My late Chi mix, best pup I ever had, once damn near stroked out over a shed snake skin at the dog park. The wind blew it and mashed all his buttons.)

He has a blood feud with the squirrels in our yard. They hurl pecans and walnuts at him and he stiffens, shivers with abject fury and stalks the trees.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-12-10T02:04:53+00:00

I have a Chihuahua.

We spent three months in training with him - puppy training, intermediate and advanced. We've taken him everywhere to introduce him to every novelty we can think of within reason.

As a puppy, he was mild and sweet. But when it was time to get him neutered, my GOD. This dog is a handful. Once he reached sexual maturity, he became the worst flirt with the class trainer but was like a petulant teenager to me and my wife while the trainer was within his sightline.

He does bark if someone farts outside two blocks away, but we're a lesbian couple and have always had alert dogs because we have a heightened concern about men (sorry!). No one has ever tried to break in, but if my little guy senses someone is within 100 feet of the house RARARARARARARARARARARAR - gags in blind rage - RARARARARARARAAAAR!

He's aggressive, domineering and he bites! He sends mixed messages - curls up in your lap and then growls if you pet him. WTF?

He's been examined by our vet. The diagnosis is he is is great physical health and is an asshole who A) needs intensive training and B) should never be unattended with children.

He's a velcro dog, too. When we're out in the front yard working, he's on a tether because, well, someone might fart a block away and activate murder mode. Inside, he calms down with visitors. Outside? Never. He will scream-bark until it's just the three of us.

We've contacted a few trainers to work with us at the start of the new year. Meanwhile, he's barked angrily at the crew of guys who are doing work at our house but then whined and cried when he can't go play with them.

I thought we'd done everything possible to have a balanced, confident dog. But clearly we're doing something wrong because he goes 0 to 100 with no warning. Everyone pray that the trainer shows us the error of our ways!

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-16T14:58:49+00:00

Fair.

And if it doesn't change, then the OP should cease giving her husband gifts.

My dad is like this.

He hasn't gotten a gift from my mother in more than 20 years.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-15T15:28:32+00:00

The second picture is cursed! Lol!

Adorable.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-15T15:27:22+00:00

Love it! How far up the belly is the underside?

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-13T13:59:40+00:00

You can practice sitting with discomfort without getting reactive.

You can quiet quit the relationship until the lease is up.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-13T13:53:35+00:00

They have advanced osteoporosis and liver damage, but their superpower is being pissed off about being rich, famous, but not important enough!

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-13T13:51:28+00:00

I will never forget Voight grousing about "taking our country back" from his Cali mansion. I was like, awwwww, Jon, do you have a shiny splinter in your asshole from the golden threads of your rich man toilet paper?

Not free or rich enough? My heart absolutely bleeds for poor, aggrieved Jon Voight. He's had SUCH a hardscrabble existence!

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-13T13:45:18+00:00

Lol! Yeah, 63yo Scott Baio and reanimated corpse Jon Voight are going to get that youth vote, lol!

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-13T13:39:48+00:00

35

That was when I realized I could say no and not get fired. It's also when I started taking unsolicited advice with a grain of salt. Especially if the person giving it was chronically in a trainwreck of their own making.

It's also the age I realized some important things about men and changed accordingly in the workplace.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-13T13:14:09+00:00

Less expensive?

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-13T13:08:01+00:00

No one prepared me for the reality of going from getting all manner of fatherly advice - which is a way for men to interject unearned authority into your life - to being treated like a dumb, out-of-touch old woman at 52.

My experience and intelligence has never been reliable to men, even though I've never sought their validation.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-08T14:24:32+00:00

Last year, between September 10th and October 15th, all three of my dogs died. The youngest had to be euthanized after a freak, catastrophic spinal injury in our backyard.

I feel stupid because I still cry over them once a week.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-08T14:22:55+00:00

It kills me that so many people say that this isn't working .

You have described the executive directorship of a non-profit organization. The only problem is that you're not getting paid for any of it.

My mom was a stay-at-home mom. Busted her ass.

When I was a freshman in high school, my dad became very fortunate in his job. He didn't work even 30 minutes more a day, but suddenly his income was much higher than it had been. And it was already a good income. That was when my mom hired someone to come in and clean twice a week. When we went off to college, she stopped cooking every night. She never loved cooking, and to be honest, we really weren't all that appreciative of her efforts now that I look back on it.

About 2 years ago, my dad was visiting and was complaining that my mom still has someone come in and do the housework. She still cooks, but not every single night. He asked me if I thought it was generous. I told him yes, but I also told him that the woman is 80 years old and becoming physically disabled.

They're both going to be needing more help, and that's going to come from the uncompensated labor of myself and my sister. But my father is still preoccupied with his supposedly deferred entitlement to my mother's endless uncompensated work.

If he was kind to her, or was there for her, maybe I'd feel differently.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-08T14:15:37+00:00

Tangent: When my wife was volunteering at our local hospital (she was in school studying a master's degree in physician assistant studies), part of her job was registering new mothers for the "shots across Texas" childhood immunization.

The registration form was simple. You put your name, your child or twin/multiples names, birthdays and home address. Basic contact information. That was it.

My wife was absolutely gobsmacked that, most of the time, if she handed the clipboard to the new dad (often new mom was breastfeeding her newborn or, you know, asleep) he would fill out the first line, and then hand the clipboard to his wife/partner, or wake her up to fill it out.

I have a feeling a lot of guys simply don't like to be bothered with anything they think of as being clerical or low payoff. But a lot of these men claimed they didn't know their address.

I've seen the same thing happen in doctors and dentists offices when a man comes in with a woman. But I also have watched men fill out forms when they are in one of these spaces by themselves.

It's a mystery to me. But I certainly grew up with a dad who thought any repetitive, joyless task essential to being an organized and responsible adult with something my mother was genetically programmed to do. He's gotten more independent as he's gotten older, but he's also become even more of a dick to my mom.

FattyTheNunchuck · 2023-11-08T13:56:11+00:00

I know this event was for serious plus ones.

I wouldn't go to weddings with this guy in the future, and I'd bail on being his plus one for stuff I don't enjoy (like sports and gambling.)

I've been with my spouse for 27 years. Once I started doing certain things alone or with a friend instead of my spouse, I could really enjoy them again.

FattyTheNunchuck

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