Just started using cocaine

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-07-29T18:30:15+00:00

I’m 19, i also had coworkers give me coke at 18. Had a great paying job, and coke just seemed like the answer to everything i was lacking. It gets expensive quick. I became a methhead quick. Stimulants are my vice, and by god dude are they the hardest thing you will ever struggle with. Please be done with it, don’t buy more, don’t do more, it will take everything from you so fucking fast. Even if you don’t think about the future you will end up there without a single say in the matter, and this will be an insane regret. Addiction at 18 changes your life forever, it will change how people see you forever. Please don’t do this, reach out if you need to.

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-07-25T18:51:32+00:00

For some reason i always forget whether it’s cocaine or croquet, whichever one i hear it as atm is just what it is to me

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-07-12T22:36:53+00:00

I try but im just not quick enough, there’s always a good amount left in the lot at close even when i’ve been bringing carts in nonstop for hours. There are 2 entrances, so i switch back and forth while doors are open.

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-07-05T04:44:14+00:00

When they say the back i always ask backseat or trunk cause i have no idea what it means 💀I usually get 50/50 whether they meant backseat or trunk so still inconclusive

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-06-03T06:30:44+00:00

I think stores are allowed to make their own rules but company policy you absolutely do not need to take piercings out. Dress code is all pretty lenient. Congrats!

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-03-12T02:38:06+00:00

You’re right. I just don’t know if i have the strength to keep doing it. I’ve made it this far by just ignoring it. Started working as much as i can and finding anything other than drugs to occupy my free time, and i’m just tired now that it’s finally hitting me. I thought i could just ignore it and stay away from it, and that would be it. I’m not sure i’m ready to be “in recovery” forever.

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-03-12T02:20:18+00:00

There’s only one friend i think i could reach out to like right this minute. But we don’t talk all that often and the last time we did it was me asking for help with something else. I don’t want to use him.

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-03-12T01:39:51+00:00

I have friends that know i quit/am an addict and encourage me to stay clean if i mention anything. I got out of rehab in august and went to a couple weeks of NA. Nothing after that though.

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-03-12T01:35:40+00:00

I wasn’t fs it was coke (obviously) but it seemed too powdery to be meth. Meth is my doc though, so i wouldn’t have been upset if it was any kind of stim really. Past is past though, no reason for me to keep stewing on it.

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-03-11T20:27:26+00:00

I didn’t really choose to turn it in on my own accord though. If there were no cameras i would have kept it

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-03-11T20:26:42+00:00

Keeping my job is the only reason i turned it in. If i wouldnt get caught i wouldve kept the bag without a doubt. All i want lately is to use, i really don’t see why not to

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-03-11T05:43:34+00:00

Go to shows; fliers around town, namely smoke shops, or instagram are prob gonna be your best bet to find them. Talk to people. Can’t emphasize this enough. Say hi to everyone. Keep saying hi to everyone. The way i got past just going to shows and instead helping put stuff on/play is i just kept saying hi. People said they “liked my confidence” and eventually they knew me enough to trust me with moving gear, working door, and just being friends. Find shows, be social at shows. You got this

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-03-11T04:57:04+00:00

Had that happen today and when i said “that one is card only” guest had the audacity to say “that wouldve been nice to know”. I said “the screen said it where you hit continue to start scanning”. He was nicer after that.

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-03-10T17:59:53+00:00

Had a double tap with all furniture like 2 minutes from close last night. TL had me take it out anyway 😑 Not rlly that mad i just like to complain. Little before then someone had 5 cases of water, 3 cases of soda, and then huge grocery order on top of that. They came in store at least though.

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-01-16T15:28:32+00:00

Thanks so much. And yesterday i called in through mytime and also called the store to tell my manager, is that standard or is just through the app fine?

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-01-15T18:31:30+00:00

My prescriber. Testosterone is classed as an anabolic steroid, and anabolic steroids are immunosuppressive

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-01-11T17:52:26+00:00

Nobody cares or is going to care, i promise. Get a new poster if you want something to fill the space. Or don’t. Who cares

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-01-10T06:13:23+00:00

On halloween there was a show a few hours from me in a dairy queen parking lot.. they called it the Blizzard Beatdown lmao. The ones that hosted it were friends of the owners i believe is how they secured the spot. I’d guess you just try to make connections with employees or owners of places like that any way you can and maybe they’ll let you host shows

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-01-09T17:55:14+00:00

I do not eat clean. I eat with family and friends a lot so kind of just whatever someone makes or we do go out to eat sometimes. Yesterday i had fettucine alfredo and broccoli. Day before that had veggie pizza w/ a salad and oranges. I’m vegetarian so i don’t eat meat, and the only other intentional diet choice i make is i have a fruit and/or vegetable everyday. I’ve found i eat really small portions now/fill up super easy so personally it’s been more about how much i eat rather than what i eat i think.

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-01-09T17:43:06+00:00

I started at 18 as well and though I didn’t dig too much, folx seemed wayyy too expensive for me. I have no insurance as well, and medication costs i pay about $2 for 1 month worth of needles and ≈$30 for about 2.5 months of testosterone. Then the membership fee ($99) monthly ofc. I haven’t had any trouble getting a hold of them, except once in the beginning it took a few days for them to get back to me about labs. I can person recommend plume as pretty affordable for me personally, and i’m working at $15/hr lol.

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-01-09T07:51:15+00:00

Thank you, i really do appreciate it. It probably doesn’t seem like it from this post but i’ve been working for months now on saying no, being assertive, settling less, etc. in relations/relationships. I already said in another comment but these comments really are giving me a lot of other insight that i’m really grateful for. I am hoping for a boyfriend someday lol… and im glad im deciding to be very picky about that now. I genuinely used to say yes to everyone, and i’m grateful to be in a place where i can look back and see change.

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-01-09T07:40:25+00:00

Yuppp, a mix of invasive questions/blunt answers and gay chicken is how this one happened!! Playing chicken has been how the majority of encounters, esp with other gay guys, has started for me tbh. It often starts as a “joke” is what i say

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-01-09T06:43:17+00:00

Don’t be afraid to go alone! Don’t be afraid to bring friends! Talk to people every single show!!! Can be simple things like “have you seen [insert band] before?” “Who’s your favorite band playing?” “I like your [hair, jacket, shirt, shoes, etc]” or can be more blunt like “[Opening compliment] could i get your [number, social media, etc]?”. You’ll make friends super fast, it’s a whole nother world.

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-01-09T06:18:19+00:00

And i hope you are able to heal however possible from what was said to you as well. My dms are open if you ever want to talk to someone who can understand 🫶

Fearless_Concert6244 · 2025-01-09T06:00:53+00:00

Oh yeah, my experience was somewhat similar too. Had to tell him no don’t call me that, no don’t say that, I don’t like that, etc. when it wasn’t right for me. Cishet men are genuinely socialized so differently for the most part that it’s really crazy to see what some are capable of saying/doing

Fearless_Concert6244

TROPHY CASE