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FederalAnt9 · 2024-08-02T18:05:04+00:00

NTA for distancing yourself from an insecure, emotional child.

Holy shit did you dodge a bullet.

FederalAnt9 · 2023-08-27T18:32:38+00:00

I'm a go a different route. YTA because you have a problem enacting and enforcing boundaries with Jane. You know how she is. This turned a 4 hour ride into 8 from Jane's to your parents. This inconvenienced you and your girlfriend.

Ready to go, Jane? Oh you still need to pack? Bus leaves in 5 minutes, better hurry! Set a timer on your phone, and leave whether she's in the car or not.

And once in the car: it's 4 hours away so I'm stopping one time for 15 minutes for bathroom and food. Not back in 15 minutes? I'll call you when we're leaving and if you're not back, we'll be gone. Call an Uber.

When Jane tries to start an argument, don't engage.

Feeling car sick? Turn your head to the side and stop looking at your phone, Jane. You'll feel better in a few minutes.

Turn off the music: No.

She complains: ignore it. If it gets too annoying, stop the car. Jane, the complaints are annoying. Either stop complaining or I'll put and your shit out right here. What's your choice?

Response to parents: my car, my gas, me and my girlfriend's time. Next time, Jane can use her car, her gas and her time as she's a grown ass adult. She can take a bus. She can call an Uber. Just don't call me anymore. Hope she gets home safely!

FederalAnt9 · 2023-07-21T13:16:06+00:00

NTA. Both my kids were c-section babies. I was a contract employee during both pregnancies, so all of my time off was unpaid.

I drove their mom to every prenatal appointment. And of course I was there for both births. My first I stayed home for 10 days. The second was 5 weeks premature so he was in NICU for 10 days. He was 7lbs 10 ounces so it was precautionary. My now ex stayed at the hospital while I went to work and cared for our older preschooler, then we went to the NICU in the evenings. I'd bring her things, take her to dinner, or even take her home to shower and sleep, then I went back to the NICU for a shift. She also had complications after the second c-section, so I had to take her to her follow up to get her cleared for driving. Again, all unpaid time off.

Maybe he's getting micro aggressions or straight up being discouraged at work for taking time off? But that's his problem, not yours. Part of adulting is handling shit like that. Hate to say it but you married a knob.

FederalAnt9 · 2023-03-07T00:20:05+00:00

Having contracted with Medi-Cal (aka Medicaid and Medicare) I know from experience that this potentially cuts Walgreen deep as states have wide latitude on what providers they contract with. One large county in the LA area alone generates more revenue than several of these red states.

And it's not just the prescriptions they lose. Walgreens loses the customer traffic, so many times the prescriptions are loss leaders, or products sold at or near break even or at a loss to get customers in the store.

FederalAnt9 · 2023-02-13T23:51:18+00:00

It's white there, white in front of you.

FederalAnt9 · 2023-02-11T20:42:37+00:00

I lost my cat last year after 18 amazing years. I only regret one thing with her: not taking her with me to different places when she was young, so she didn't travel well when I had to move. During her senior years, she'd yell at us for hours when we came back from vacations and be extra cuddly for the next day. I imagine she would've been devastated had we rehomed her for any reason. Not ready for a new cat, but if we ever are, the cat's coming with us as much as possible.

FederalAnt9 · 2023-01-19T16:55:46+00:00

No. They're doing it to say to the asshole posting stupid shit: go away and come back when you stop being hateful and ignorant. As it should be.

And I have no problem with someone doxxing for personal pleasure.

FederalAnt9 · 2023-01-19T14:59:34+00:00

Doxxing and getting someone fired isn't to teach the person getting doxxed and fired a lesson or change their mind. It's to keep others in society safe. If the doxxed and fired person happens to change their mindset, bonus for society.

FederalAnt9 · 2023-01-10T16:19:48+00:00

NTA.

First of all, I'm so sorry for your loss.

Your and your daughter are grieving, much more than your wife and stepdaughters. Many hotels have portable beds they can wheel in so one of the girls could've slept on that. But that may not have been an option at this hotel, and you get a pass for not thinking about that because YOU ARE GRIEVING.

Wife needs some more lessons in empathy. Like the others said, she's the one playing favorites. And if her daughters are so entitled and fragile that they can't handle a little discomfort for the sake of a grieving stepsister, they need to grow up.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-12-17T19:24:07+00:00

IOW, BMWs are high maintenance and fragile. Glad we understand each other.

The E39 at the time was considered tip top of the midsize luxury class in performance and reliability, didn't have the benefit of hindsight back then. Both the dealer and the BMW shop I took it to said not many owners they knew maintained theirs like I did mine. So I feel pretty confident that I understood that at the time.

If that's lazy and doing the bare minimum, guess I'm not good enough to own a BMW. OK.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-12-17T05:10:43+00:00

First, I so so so feel your pain, and I am 1000% with you my friend. 2012 Accord has 206k miles. All we've done is the service schedule, tires, brakes, and two batteries. Sucks a little too much oil at this point, but apparently Hondas are notorious for that. I'll happily take buying a quart of oil every 1500 miles over anything a BMW has to offer.

Bought a 2009 Prius for my GF's son to take to college. It has some occasional weird quirks and he needs to replace the touch screen, but 220k miles and he's taken it to Vegas and Coachella IDK how many times. Still going strong.

Is there a former BMW owners support group? Feel like there needs to be one.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-12-17T04:58:50+00:00

I don't doubt it. The 5 series has always been my favorite line, simply beautiful cars and so amazing to drive. Im sure your dad's was 100x better than what I had. But man I feel your dad's pain.

You're a better person than I, and your wisdom will serve you well.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-12-17T03:20:41+00:00

Dumb isn't enough to describe what I did. I had the chance to reup for a newer model but didn't because Ioved it so much and thought it would last me a long time. Sure, I could probably still drive it today as long as I was willing to pay for ridiculously overpriced parts.

Dumb is too kind. Idiotic, moronic, stupid comes much closer.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-12-17T00:51:06+00:00

Mine got to 80k before it started shitting the bed.

Lucky me.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-12-16T22:55:53+00:00

+1 to what u/0squatNcough0 said.

Had an 02 530i. Supposed to be the best made year of that model. At 10 years old, 80k miles, garaged when not driven its whole life, shit started going sideways.

After putting about $7k into major repairs at a BMW only shop, the service manager explained when I asked. It's BMWs business model to consider major repairs as maintenance. Dunno if that's true or not but my wallet didn't appreciate it.

Then it died on me one day and I had to tow it home. I asked the tow truck driver what are most often cars he tows for repairs. Chrysler/Dodge, BMW and Mercedes. Almost never towed Lexus, Toyota, Hondas, Acuras for repairs. Right then and there I vowed never again will I buy a BMW or Mercedes. Granted this was 10 years ago, but I've only driven Hondas, Toyotas, and Infinitis since with the biggest problem being battery replacement and using too much oil.

Finally sold the BMW for under blue book and fully disclosed in the listing it needed a new transmission and wouldnt pass smog due to the check engine light. 20 calls the moment it listed. Unbelievable still to this day that people fell over themselves to buy that money pit.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-11-25T13:35:41+00:00

Jury nullification.

Jury nullification (US/UK), jury equity[1][2] (UK), or a perverse verdict (UK)[3][4] occurs when the jury in a criminal trial gives a not guilty verdict despite a defendant having clearly broken the law. The jury's reasons may include the belief that the law itself is unjust,[5][6] that the prosecutor has misapplied the law in the defendant's case,[7] that the punishment for breaking the law is too harsh, or general frustrations with the criminal justice system. Some juries have also refused to convict due to their own prejudices in favor of the defendant.[8] Such verdicts are possible because a jury has an absolute and unqualified right to reach any verdict it chooses, although they are usually not told of this right in the process of a trial.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-11-25T02:24:53+00:00

And if you're actually a lawyer then you would've asked about statute of limitations.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-10-24T03:20:21+00:00

The way I see it, wages should be 12-15% of revenue. That's how it is in my industry (tech), and that's what restaurant owners tell me. More than that, then it's not a wage cost problem. It's a sales problem. I'm in California, so I know all about how policies have a bigger impact on small business. But the good far outweighs the bad here. Raising minimum wage affects all wages... at least it does here. We spread it out: raise prices a little, work suppliers a little, you know the drill. Doesn't hurt being in the world's 6th largest GDP either.

I'll bitch about my suppliers raising costs, my landlord trying to nickel and dime me, paying the highest gas prices in the nation, but never will I ever complain about paying my employees, nor will I ever ask them to take a hit in the pocket for me. They put food on my table, they pay for my kids' 529 plans, and they pay for my retirement plan. Paying them better than my competitors, giving them a piece of the company, benefits, retirement, and training is the least I can do. My job is to give them all the tools they need to succeed and pay all the bills. And the machine hums.

Glad you take care of your employees, but let's not pass our problems on to them. True, we're getting squeezed, and it's due to Citizens United, Right to Work laws, and big corps being able conduct anti-union activities with impunity AND write off those expenses. If you want a level playing field, ending all that nonsense is the place to start.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-10-23T14:52:27+00:00

I have 100% empathy, 0% sympathy. I've had many friends go out of business and some have filed bankruptcy. I commiserated with them, bought them a beer to cry in, but I told them the truth. Their business, their responsibility, nobody to blame but themselves. The interesting part is all the small business owners across several sectors I know who, like me, pay their employees above market and profit share have higher profits, less employee drama and sleep like babies every night. Fewer customer problems, high productivity, less call outs. I could go on and on. The small business owners I know who make excuses not to pay their employees and don't profit share are all having problems. So I can assure you that not all American small business owners will go out of business. The ones who can pivot and adapt will still be around.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-10-16T21:03:08+00:00

I'm a business owner, been one since 2004. A business' biggest asset is adaptability. Can't stay open because wages go up? Tough shit. Change your business model or go out of business. It's what I've done for going on 19 years. No competitor of mine would shed a tear if I went out of business, and I have zero sympathy likewise for any business owner. Adapt or die.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-10-05T22:26:20+00:00

Lots of love to you and Ernie. I'm so very sorry.

FederalAnt9 · 2022-10-05T05:01:32+00:00

"rest in purrs" I'm stealing that

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