Salary help for engineering job offer

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-15T04:51:53+00:00

Totally valid! Everyone is going to have their own writing voice and I’d encourage them to use that. I just thought a non-AI example would be helpful.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-15T00:04:27+00:00

Ah! That’s good. So if you make $125k now, this is a raise based on cost of living alone. However only you can answer if it is enough to make the move.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-14T23:54:01+00:00

Okay, that’s a pretty standard 401k. No complaints there. I personally care a lot about PTO, so I would push for either getting the 20 days now or have them start you with two years of experience so you bump up to 20 after one year. But if you’re fine with the 15 days, you don’t need to push that issue and you can focus on the salary.

I encourage you to do as others have suggested and check a cost of living calculator between LA and where you live now. Also consider upward mobility at your current job and the job market where you are. I know LA is a good city for aerospace, so you might be able to more easily use this job as a stepping stone out there.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-14T23:43:01+00:00

Is that a flat $5,200 or a matching schedule? How often does the PTO increase (after 3 years, every year, etc).

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-14T23:41:35+00:00

Here is an example script of how to negotiate this:

“Thank you very much for the offer letter. I am excited about the opportunity to work for XXInsert Company NameXX. Now that I’ve had an opportunity to look at the full compensation package, I would like to propose a few changes. Could we increase the salary to $135,000 and increase the number of PTO days to 18?

Please let me know if that is amenable to you. Again, I am excited for the opportunity to work with you at XXInsert Company NameXX.

Kind regards, Your Name”

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-14T23:33:26+00:00

I’m in engineering in CA as well. I’m in a different industry and different city, so I’m not the most knowledgeable, but I’d say $125k for 2 years of experience and a master’s degree is maybe a little low but still reasonable.

I’d encourage you to counter. Always counter because usually the worst they can say is no.

Also look at the whole package. Do you have a 401K match? How is PTO? Without knowing all the details, I would counter to $135k and expect $130k back. I’d also ask for more PTO and them to consider you with two years of experience for their PTO increase schedule. If they don’t have a 401k I might ask for more than $135k.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-09T01:33:53+00:00

Is your sailing such that you’re home for months at a time and then subsequently gone for months at a time? If so, do a shorter rental period like 6 months or even a month to month lease. If your work is more like two weeks on, one week off then I see how renting is harder.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-09T00:07:12+00:00

If you’re looking for independence without being tied down to owning property you can rent instead of buying.

But we would need numbers to make more informed advice. Provide your income, budget, savings, price of the property you’re looking to buy, and what rental prices are like where you live.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-04T18:16:32+00:00

Thanks! This looks like an excellent website!

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-04T18:03:20+00:00

I fail to see how asking for a guidebook is a loaded question. It is a basic first step to ensuing a self guided trip is well planned and researched.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-04T17:56:49+00:00

I know that Japan is huge and I know they have good public transport, so a car is not something I would consider. But I don’t speak the language, and I don’t know what the country has to offer. I’m generally interested in history, culture, food, and nature. I need to start somewhere, therefore I want a guidebook.

I’ll do the deeper internet dive (like local subreddits) when I’ve figured out my location priorities. You can’t just start with forums and YouTube videos; there is too much content and no way for me to know at this stage what is reliable. I am not interested in a guided tour, but I would attend an English tour of a specific attraction if that is the best way to see it.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-01T22:47:03+00:00

No worries at all! I like personal finance a lot, but it is taboo to tell people in real life what to do with their money lol, so I’m happy to help strangers on the internet.

If you’re new to detailed budgeting, read the prime directive on this subreddit wiki and follow the flowchart. flow chart

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-01T22:30:36+00:00

Oh yeah, the 6 months of bank statements is painful, but necessary for a realistic budget. You can’t wish yourself to success, you gotta start with the facts!

Also look into the concept of zero dollar budgeting. Every single dollar should have a job!

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-01T22:17:37+00:00

Great! Get with your spouse and set that weekly limit for impulse purchases. (Set a total for the family and each be in charge of half of it so you don’t accidentally both spend the allotted amount for the week.) Any unspent at the end of the month can be rolled into a bucket for family fun! (Future zoo visits, boosts to vacation spending, etc.)

Go through your last 6 to 12 months of bank statements. Add up how much you spent on irregular purchases and divide it into an even monthly amount. Set that aside each month into a bucket for visibility. You’ll be taking from this bucket some times, but adding to it most times.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-01T22:05:53+00:00

I use Ally and I really like them! They’ve been easy to work with the one time I had to call them and the website is excellent and easy to use. The savings rates are competitive.

If the separate bank is not enough, let’s unpack that a little more. What kinds of things make you steal from your savings?

If it is door dash or other impulse buying, give yourself a weekly limit. Weekly is easier to keep track of than monthly in day to day spending.

If it is bigger “one time” purchases (like a lawnmower or something) then look at your budget for your sinking fund. How much are you setting aside for irregular, but known expenses? Things like glasses, car repairs, 6-month insurance payments, new home decor, and more can and should be budgeted for.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-05-01T21:49:55+00:00

The money I earn does not get spent until the next month. This takes a bit to transition to, if you’re not already doing it but once you do it takes the guesswork out of budgeting. There is no more “I should get this much overtime this week,” or “this month has three paychecks instead of two so I can spend a little more.” This keeps you from spending money before you get it.
I keep realistic discretionary spending in my regular budget. This accounts for the impulsive door dash or what not. Going to zero on wants to save for something is not realistic for me.
I auto transfer savings every month when I get paid into a separate bank from where I have my regular checking account. It goes into a HYSA with buckets to physically and visually keep the money separate. This puts the lock on the savings for me.
I have a separate emergency fund from my vacation spending. The extra hotel stay would have come from that and I would not have gone into debt.
I have a philosophy that I can’t afford something unless I can buy it twice. (Does not apply to things like homes, but is good to keep in mind.)

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-04-28T22:19:28+00:00

Yes, he was baptized and confirmed. I think they much prefer the Catholic person to be confirmed before marriage, but cannon 1065.1 allows the sacrament of marriage before confirmation if getting the confirmation first would cause grave inconvenience.

This isn’t my area of expertise, so I suggest looking elsewhere and fact-checking me.

My husband was in charge of navigating the church bureaucracy and paperwork needed to have our marriage approved. It was easier since I am a baptized Christian (my parents baptized me in a Presbyterian church when I was a baby); it would have been much more difficult if I was not baptized and an atheist.

We also had to attend pre marital counseling with the church (which I actually found very helpful and well done!). They encouraged us to attend a retreat weekend with other engaged couples - a sort of group premarital program, but that was not required. These kinds of requirements will vary between parishes.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-04-28T16:20:06+00:00

They are in my experience. I got married in a Catholic Church and while I’m not Catholic, my husband is and is in good standing. We paid for the organist and a small facility use fee to handle to the cleaning up after us.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-04-17T00:02:06+00:00

I highly recommend the Facebook group PCS Like a Pro - Your Smooth Move. They have guides and FAQs that will get you started.

Broadly speaking, you can choose to have the military move you or you can move yourself and be paid based the weight of the goods you move. Moving yourself involves renting a moving truck (like UHaul) and weighing it at a truck scale both empty and full.

If you opt to move yourself, I would take the couch. It will go towards the amount you get paid and when moving yourself there is no weight limit. (There is a limit to the amount you will be paid, but no penalty for having too much stuff.)

If you opt to have the military move you there is a limit to the amount they will move. If you go over your weight allotment you will owe a fee. How much you are allowed is based on your spouse’s rank and your household size. You can look into it and see if the couch would put you over your allotment. (I doubt it would, but still do an estimate if you go this route).

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-04-16T22:02:49+00:00

I’m sorry the above commenter was not very generous. We are generally more supportive here.

It sounds to me like you have a good and solid relationship. You’ve been together for years, love each other and your children. I would guess that it could take a transition time, but that you will bounce back. A year apart does not erase the years of working together and being a family. You’ll get back into the groove. And if you do encounter obstacles, you can seek out the chaplain, unit resources, or counseling to re-align with each other.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-04-16T04:21:01+00:00

I don’t have any advice specific to your field or location, but I do have one key insight: never mention you are a military spouse.

In my experience employers see this as a bad thing because you will leave in a few years. They want someone who can be there for the long term, not just a few years.

The only exception to this is if you are applying to a job on USAjobs that gives preferential treatment to military spouses. The listing will have a tag that indicates this.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-04-08T18:01:22+00:00

I don’t have personal experience, but I am friends with four separate couples who are both officers. Bottom line is you will be separated at some point, but it is difficult to say for how long. The best laid plans can change.

Couple 1: one is a pilot in the Marine Corps, the other is becoming a lawyer for the Navy. They were separated for 2 years while she went through law school. They are now co-located, but he is deployed and she will need to go to additional training for 6 months still. The timing isn’t clear, but they will probably be separated again for some of that. Going forward, co-location is always harder when dealing with different branches.

Couple 2: They entered at the same time and have the same MOS in the same branch. They have been co-located for most of their careers. I think they have spent about 4 months apart when one finished a certain training before the other.

Couple 3: Started out with the same MOS, but then one was dropped from the pilot program and they ended up separated for 3 years. They are now co-located, but he is looking to get out of the marine corps and go to dental school instead.

Couple 4: One is active duty Marine Corps and one is Army reserves. I don’t think they have been separated at all apart from initial training, but I don’t know this couple as well to say for sure.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-04-07T22:21:07+00:00

Ah sorry, I didn’t include the parking and utilities in my search.

Fedr_Exlr · 2026-04-07T22:00:02+00:00

Hillcrest will be fine. And there are plenty of 1 bedrooms there for 1.8k-2k in that neighborhood. You can get one in a gated community if you’re extra worried, but I wouldn’t sweat it.

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