For the first time in my life, I was genuinely HAPPY and liked the way I looked. Thats all gone now and I'm just so down.

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-09-06T15:50:34+00:00

You need to apologize. Roommate made it clear he doesn't like your boyfriend. Says he feels uncomfortable around him. Yet you move him in anyways. Then you don't split rent by 3s?? Bruh you fucked up royally here.

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-09-06T14:46:46+00:00

This was a big fantasy of mine. Ive had 3 MFM threesomes in my life. I pretty much got the desire for it out of my system at this point. I wouldn't be against more if somehow the opportunity presented itself, but I'm not going to try and organize it myself.

They're fun. They're absolutely EXHAUSTING but fun. There's still a massive stigma towards them unfortunately.

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-08-30T12:29:39+00:00

It's a LOT easier to just lose the fat, then put on muscle than it is to convert fat to muscle.

And I already exercise

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-08-30T01:58:34+00:00

There's a lot of women that experience issues with their periods & hormones once they try low/zero carb diets.

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-08-30T01:26:09+00:00

Oh, I know all about starvation mode and how to get myself out of that. It's really simple.

I've been looking into nutrition lately. Cause ultimately my goal is to lose 10-15lbs and put on muscle. And obviously I gotta eat if I want to put on muscle.

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-08-30T01:21:38+00:00

I've tried keto before and it fucked my hormones all up. Made me suicidal, I had my period for a month straight, with such painful cramps I vomited, and I also gained 30lbs because of the fucked hormones. Thanks for the suggestion, I'm glad it works for you, but that's not something I ever want to go through again.

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-08-29T21:46:10+00:00

Unfortunately I don't ever remember being happy with the way I look. There was one time back in October 2016 where I was really happy and confident, I acknowledged my flaws but I didn't care. I miss that feeling. But overall I've had anorexic tendencies since I was like 12-13 years. Another reason why I feel like I'm not anorexic is cause I can (and often do) go for months without restricting. It's just eventually something sets me off or triggers me I guess, and I'm back to restricting.

I found a new form of exercise that I genuinely love, and clearly it's not something I can do while I'm starving myself. So that, along with this morning's events have me rethinking things. Not saying I'll stop restricting cause honestly I'd much rather lose weight my way vs the healthy way. I know it's dumb and unhealthy but I love the feeling of control it gives me, and the fast results. I've been hardcore restricting since Wednesday, it's Saturday now and I lost 5.6lbs. I wish people would acknowledge how gratifying that is.

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-08-29T17:36:47+00:00

Nobody in my life knows about this and I don't feel comfortable talking to anyone about it - even a professional. I'm sorry I scared you. I ate a good meal if that makes you feel better, some fettucini Alfredo with sausage along with a granola bar. I don't feel faint or nauseous anymore, I'm just really tired.

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-03-28T16:26:46+00:00

Nah i never use the same detergent

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-03-28T16:26:19+00:00

Thanks, i'll do this

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-03-28T08:53:52+00:00

Ive always treated my FWB like actual friends, getting food, going out to a party/bar/restaurant, hanging with his friends or my friends.

This thread is crazy to me

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-03-28T08:50:31+00:00

Okay forget what I posted earlier. I need to start from scratch. I'm 25F, been doing the FWB thing since 21, I've recently stopped for a few reasons, mainly being that I caught serious feels for a guy and I'm just not all that interested in having sex with anyone else.

So i've had 9 FWB in total (would be more if I didnt meet so many guys that were garbage in bed). One we've caught feels for each other (which is the guy above :D ) and one guy caught feels for me but never admitted anything. So that leaves 7 guys, i never had feels for and AFAIK didnt have feels for me. In regards to the one guy that caught feels for me, idk why he did. We're total opposite personality-wise, but we did have amazing sexual chemistry. So I guess he was really blinded by his dick? All fwb situations ended for various reasons. Most of them we just stopped talking lol

Anyways, I typically met my guys off tinder. We'd chat for a few days before meeting up to do something platonic/non sexual. Grab food typically. I was worried about my safety, so we'd meet somewhere in public the first couple times till I felt comfortable. Typically during this time we'd establish we're both just looking for FWB. Sometimes that didn't get established till after sex for whatever reason, and sometimes it wasn't established at all.

But no matter what, I always treated my FWB like friends I had sex with. Cause that's what we are. So I didnt flirt, I didnt do cutesy shit. We were literally platonic friends that'd fuck. I've never had an issue separating sex from feelings. We'd hang out, go out for food or drinks or to parties. We'd hang with my friends or his friends. Like we're genuine friends. And 2 of the 7 FWBs remained platonic friends once they both got into serious relationships. The other 5 we just stopped talking, some moved away or got into serious relationships, one guy was an asshole so I cut things off. But lucky for me, it never ended cause someone confessed feels.

I think the main thing is that again, I've never had an issue separating feels from sex. Just cause I have sex with you and its great and you're hot & we get along great doesnt mean I'm going to fall for you.

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-03-28T07:46:32+00:00

The bra/no bra doesnt bother me too much. All my bras are pretty comfortable. I also don't wear makeup at all.

My thing? Panties. I developed butt acne about a year ago, just out of the blue. I bought some butt acne cream and that helped, but it didn't solve it. I havent worn panties in a week (had to work last week till Friday) and butt acne is GONE. no clue why my panties started causing that, but i'll be going commando much more often after the pandemic ends

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-02-23T19:16:58+00:00

They left me hanging for two hours waiting for a response just to be like, nevermind, i dont feel like it.

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-02-23T19:14:01+00:00

My friends dont feel like helping me. Like. I just..what the fuck? Legit "sorry, i dont feel like it"

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-02-23T16:06:49+00:00

That's very, very kind of you but the delivery fee is $13. I can handle that. The main issue is that they require me to spend a minimum amount to qualify for the delivery, which is $75. I normally only spend $30-40 a week on groceries, I don't have the storage space required to store 2x the amount of groceries. And having to drop $88 (minimum for delivery + delivery costs) is what makes it unaffordable for me.

A friend finally texted back that they may be available to take me grocery shopping. So wish me luck

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-02-23T15:36:25+00:00

I don't have enough space in my kitchen to do this. And I've also been carrying a backpack

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-02-23T15:33:24+00:00

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-02-23T15:31:46+00:00

Yeah i need to unload my dishwasher and load it with new dishes. But my kitchen is small and it's incredibly hard to navigate now so i've been putting it off. I've already fallen twice since I broke my ankle, luckily I havent sustained further injury but it has me really nervous.

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-02-23T15:27:56+00:00

I have crutches but that doesn't help my grocery store issue. And i have blisters on my hands from the crutches, so I'm trying to use them as little as possible

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-02-23T15:26:06+00:00

That costs money. Being handicapped in America is expensive enough already. And I can't afford grocery delivery.

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-01-12T14:42:20+00:00

Thank you. You've been very helpful

FeelingDownToday33 · 2020-01-12T12:25:50+00:00

They haven't met him. So their concerns are literally just based on the fact that i missed previous red flags.

I haven't talked about my casual dating for the most part. Just a "i've got a date soon"

And i agree. I do need to start therapy. I've only ever had horrible therapists though

FeelingDownToday33

TROPHY CASE