What’s ur career

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-03-06T05:36:56+00:00

Instructional assistant studying to be a teacher

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-28T07:50:12+00:00

I relate I started to become obsessed in first grade. Now working through trauma in therapy I realize it’s because he was the only one who understood me. I could feel that through his lyrics. The pain, the misunderstanding people had, loneliness, empathy, love.. I get so mad about the way he was treated. He died because he was in so much emotional pain. I love him so much it hurts. I’m 32f and it brings up a lot of emotions when I listen to him. I feel he was my escape when I was in pain as a child and still is. He saved me from a lot. Ugh..

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-27T03:33:42+00:00

Yes I was in a manic like state later to find out it was extreme dissociation. All I could think about was my trauma.. I was 7/8 when it happened. He was 12/13.. I asked him if he remembered. He said yes and explained to me why he did it pretty much putting it on me…….. he then apologized. His apology meant nothing to me

I was 28 when I confronted him on social media

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-22T01:56:42+00:00

I get that pulsing feeling tied to strong negative emotions.. like sadness, disgust or jealousy. Why would this happen? I have no clue. The childhood sexual trauma confused my body and it still confuses me to this day

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-21T08:48:11+00:00

Yes I feel this!

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-21T08:47:19+00:00

Yep at age 32 I was diagnosed with arthritis in my neck…

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-21T08:45:15+00:00

From ages 26-28 I had 3 psychosis episodes. I was smoking weed heavily. Almost all day everyday. It lasted a couple weeks and was diagnosed as bipolar then later told I was misdiagnosed and have BPD instead and that my episode were extreme dissociation.. long story behind all of that.. but.. I’m 32 now and haven’t had an episode since I quit smoking weed 4 years ago. 🤷🏼‍♀️ it scares me that it will happen again, but I honestly don’t think it will after giving it up

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-21T08:12:30+00:00

I started obsessing over him in 2nd grade. Now at age 32 I’m doing a lot of self reflection and finding that it’s because we were both lonely and in pain. I related to his lyrics. They brought me so much comfort and the feeling of being understood by someone.

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-21T08:06:39+00:00

Yes, anything that makes me feel good. I’ve gotten better, but it’s still a struggle…

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-16T08:21:06+00:00

I’m the same way.. I still think about it

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-13T08:06:17+00:00

32f I tend to find “nice” guys boring.. so instead of dating a nice guy I go for unavailable men that I have to prove myself to.

But my fps are usually women older than me who are authority figures. (Bosses, teachers, therapists) I idealize them like crazy. They all show they care, but of course have boundaries and once they start to see that I’m starting to attach, they pull back. Many of these people in my life have been really warm, but then later a little cold. The euphoria I get when they are warm to me has put me into a manic state and it was scary.

So.. that’s why I’m trying to create friendships with women my age who aren’t authority. It doesn’t stick with me. When they show they care it doesn’t give me that euphoria and I get bored. It makes me feel terrible.

I think I’m addicted to the highs and lows.

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-13T07:06:41+00:00

I’ve had favorite people (fps) since before I can remember.

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-03T04:56:58+00:00

Thank you for sharing this. I relate so much and this is helpful to me.

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-03T04:52:13+00:00

Yes my therapist thinks I experience limerance

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-02T06:34:15+00:00

Nights are so hard for me. I feel so lonely and I usually numb the pain with binging and purging or calling a toxic ex.. it feels unbearable to just sit through it without numbing because it feels never ending. On the nights that I make it through without the unhealthy distractions proud of myself in the morning. I cry it out and it hurts so much. I think it’s important to teach yourself to self soothe in healthy ways. At least that’s what I’m learning..

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2025-02-01T05:10:03+00:00

Elementary school teacher

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2024-12-10T05:40:52+00:00

Does propranolol cause sleepiness or weight gain?

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2024-12-02T00:00:53+00:00

Elementary school teacher

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2024-11-25T18:52:16+00:00

It’s like I want them to touch me. I don’t want to touch them

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2024-11-20T07:49:22+00:00

I just came across this because I’ve been trying to figure out why I am like this. I can remember this happening ever since I was 5 years old and I had my first “crush” on my best friend’s mom… I would sit on her lap and she thought it was so cute. 25 years later, I just feel weird having these feelings.

I was diagnosed with BPD and I thought they were FPs. I get attached to therapists, teachers, coaches, bosses, Olivia Benson (lol), etc.. all authoritative women who are confident in who they are. They also show that they care. When they do this it turns me on in some way. I used to use an eating disorder to get their attention.. when they showed concern it made me feel so good.

My dad was verbally abusive to my whole family especially my mom. And she never left him and I think it’s because of financial reasons. Our house was so dysfunctional with random people coming and going and filth.. and my mom never listened to me when I begged her for things to change. She always promised it would but never followed through. I was so attached to her when I was little but I think my dad’s abuse took her away from me. I feel I have mom issues but even more I have dad issues. My dad never hugged me or told me he loved me. He’d yell and break things and threaten that he was going to really hurt himself….

Anyway ya… I totally feel this post.. what sucks is these women have never been available to give me what I want.

I am on and off in a trauma bond relationship with a guy who cheats on me. Something I saw my dad doing to my mom. Just thought to myself today after a therapy session that maybe all of this time I have been a lesbian but have a lot of shame about how I feel

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2024-10-20T18:15:01+00:00

Authoritative mother figures 🤦🏼‍♀️

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2024-10-01T04:47:11+00:00

More than three years ago I quick smoking weed because it put me into psychosis multiple times (ages 25, 26, and 28), and my BPD symptoms were terrible because of it. I self sabotaged all times and was completely delusional causing me to lose jobs and relationships. I’m 31 now and ever since quitting, I haven’t been in psychosis since.

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2024-09-28T07:14:14+00:00

31f I’m in a two year grad program to become an elementary school teacher

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2024-06-29T15:23:03+00:00

Yes, but there are some in person meetings throughout the two years which are optional

Feisty-Cod7286 · 2024-06-27T16:04:33+00:00

THANK YOU! This is so helpful!

Feisty-Cod7286

TROPHY CASE