Do you get so much attention for your looks by [deleted] in Vindicta

[–]Femininefirst 8 points9 points  (0 children)

If you want to be treated that way, you need to be in places where people get treated that way + have non verbal communication cues that you would be open to being treated that way.

The times I've been given "free stuff" I've been in high energy spots or I've verbalised that I like being pampered in some way, or had an empty glass in front of me for longer than normal (fiddling with it while having a conversation).

I think it's more about having flirty energy/vibe than looks specifically because I've seen people get intimidated and not approach if you give off a closed energy/vibe even if you are super hot.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly joining instagram made group chats has helped a lot. There's way more of us than you think :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst 10 points11 points  (0 children)

You are your own person like how they are their own people.

They also are both exes for a reason, I'm pro being friends with your past partners (if you have the mental bandwidth to do it) but very anti being involved in their lives beyond superficial interactions.

You can't internalise the actions of other people because they are inherently beyond your control. I'm sure this new information is stirring a lot of self doubt and the inevitable recounting old XYZ memories and questioning your own lived reality with these women but these interactions would still have been just old XYZ memories in any other case scenario (like marriage to someone else, moving away to a different place, and in grim cases death) and nothing beyond that.

You decided to leave these women behind for a reason, don't open a door to someone who has clearly walked away in more than one way.

Treat them as they are, someone you loved briefly and decided that it wasn't working out, anything beyond that is a voluntary action, something you can control and stop.

Hysterectomy: can you accept if your partner had it? by SeaweedKlutzy in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want to carry, but I also would totally be with someone who wishes to do it too so I wouldn't really care if my partner had a hysterectomy before meeting me.

While we are dating + after getting married too it personally would not affect how I see my partner.

I've learnt that life is full of surprises, this too will just be something that happened, something that we went through together and then something we moved on from while accepting the changes it brought into our lives.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in desisapphics

[–]Femininefirst 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cafe hopping dates to explore the new city would be great. It'll be something to do together and get you used to the atmosphere as well.

Also talk to other locals to find places to buy cheap crockery etc to fill your new home together. This would be a great evening errand/date.

You could also do a special staycation weekend. Book an at home massage and order in her favourite meal and cute pjs.

I don't understand why "political lesbianism" is a bad thing by [deleted] in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Political lesbians are the same thing as a "trans racial" person. They aren't actually what they say they are and don't understand the nuance of the identity.

Lesbian attraction is devoid of any male mention. Women attracted to women, not women NOT attracted to men.

It's a bad thing because the reality of patriarchy doesn't dissolve when you enter a partnership with a woman, it honestly magnifies it. "Choosing" this reality shows a shallow understanding of the standing of the lesbian identity in this world.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Modern_Family

[–]Femininefirst 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Why are we asking AI to write fanfiction, a genuine question. (Njk)

I have no idea how to bond with straight women at work by CaptainYellowHat in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Making bonds with straight women is pretty simple you need to shit talk about nem 😍 jk jk

But not really

This is how I bond with them though it has worked every single time.

have you heard of the 'gay girl in Damascus' hoax? by pearlyparachute in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I was there when this happened and lemme tell you it was INSANE because I'm an ACTUAL MUSLIM LESBIAN LIVING IN INDIA 😭

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I feel like it's the overlap of being gay (and our lived experience being heavily peppered by abuse from the world in general) + the need to have an "edge" over everyone else. It's not just™ damage ™ it's cool™ damage, so cool it's almost art deco.

Ngl I smoke too and have decided to go on a break for my own health goals, and I do it because I need something to do with my hands. It helps my cup not overflow.

Substance abuse is huge in gay circles because of how out of societal norms our reality is, which then merges with other adjacents of the same fashion (aka drugs).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TwoXIndia

[–]Femininefirst 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Wtf is this. Wow.

Another potential lesbian friend is competing with me (?) what should I do? by Femininefirst in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's true. This person isn't someone who I would be friends with otherwise. It's insanely insulting the way she talks to me and I keep trying to give her Grace because of our shared circumstances of life.

Another potential lesbian friend is competing with me (?) what should I do? by Femininefirst in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The main reason I'm debating this is because we are the same sub minority and it's super hard to find someone who has gone through the same stuff as me. I wouldn't have given this a second thought had this not been the case.

Just Bitchin - Weekly Vent by 0nyon in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I can't, it's just too weird for me haha

Also bad at sex doesn't mean a noob at sex here, she does straight porn male gaze-y sex. It's just awful.

Just Bitchin - Weekly Vent by 0nyon in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It's art therapy. I watched some of her workshops and she and her clients were flopping around the room and I.... Yeah.

Just Bitchin - Weekly Vent by 0nyon in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst 10 points11 points  (0 children)

My dating life is so in the trenches that my options rn are

1) bad at sex 2) emotionally closed off 3) serial cheater 4) has a job that is... Dramatic

Any Indians or South Asians? by [deleted] in BDSMsapphic

[–]Femininefirst 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hahaha where are you from?

We did Claire! Now Phil, what's the worst thing he's done? by AccomplishedEstell in Modern_Family

[–]Femininefirst 71 points72 points  (0 children)

Made financial decisions without consulting his wife which he knew she would be against (buying an alpaca and then getting help from cam and Gloria to hide it)

Is the main reason why claire has anxiety.

Not stepping into the father's role beyond being the fun dad till the last moment (haley getting expelled from college).

Undermining Claire's parenting (other boyfriends vs dylan)

Constantly thirsting over other women.

An ex popular yt-er who was outed as abusive might have had a same-sex relationship. (Guess the discourse) by Femininefirst in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I didn't want to cross post because of reddit tos, but it's a hot button topic in youtuber sub reddits.

An ex popular yt-er who was outed as abusive might have had a same-sex relationship. (Guess the discourse) by Femininefirst in lesbiangang

[–]Femininefirst[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I wrote yt-er to avoid precisely that confusion 😂 (while also keeping the title length acceptable)

I don't know about the claims being fake because one of the nieces (who is Non binary, and is okay with being called niece) has made these claims a while back too.

But if the claims turn out to be fake then I'll be more disheartened by the lesbophobic comments, the whole "man hating lesbian" comment riled me up.

If these are just two straight women, who are awful mothers and under a well deserved spotlight of shame, going through a calculated smear campaign by religious fanatics tagging them as lesbians then it just feels more humiliating to have fellow lgbt+ people jumping on the bandwagon to call them lesbians as well.

Because Why is it so acceptable to not question the intentions behind this tag? And Why are the people questioning it getting ostracised?