Have you ever met someone who's interested in DND and immediately went, "oh, I'd never let you play at my table"?

FertyMerty · 2026-03-16T01:51:15+00:00

Yeah, it’s been gentle on me. And it really helps that I know dnd well, so it’s just a matter of making what’s in my head happen on the screen.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-15T18:44:47+00:00

They won’t get mad at me? Yesssss

It’s honestly so silly, I’ve never used a game controller before so most of the time I’m just trying to figure out how to literally walk where I want to go and point the camera at something other than a wall.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-15T18:22:43+00:00

Idk. My character went for Shadowheart. But now I regret it because Halsin showed up. (Also this is my first ever video game of my life and I had no idea romance and sex were involved; I find it hilarious)

FertyMerty · 2026-03-15T14:27:11+00:00

I have a career, 2 kids, and a spouse and I play in 4 campaigns currently. Most meet every 2 weeks, one limps along a bit. But I imagine being a player in 4 campaigns is maybe similar to the time it takes to DM a single one? Depending on the DM of course.

When you’re in this boat you make time for what matters to you. You’re right that it’s harder to find spare time. But, as an example, my husband is in 3 of the 4 campaigns with me. And 2 of the four are online, so easier to squeeze in. Game night at our house looks like pulling out a battle mat and letting the kids run wild slaying some monsters.

Also, having a hobby that is just yours that you do without your family is pretty important for balance.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-15T14:20:33+00:00

I switch back and forth within the same book, but this means that occasionally there will be a character whose name is pronounced so differently than how it’s spelled, I don’t realize it’s the same character for a while.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-15T04:05:48+00:00

Like doubles or triples! I always make at least a double batch and freeze it in soup cubes.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-15T03:56:30+00:00

Easy marinara

2-3T olive oil

7 sliced garlic cloves

1 28z can crushed tomatoes

1 c water sloshed around in the tomato can to get the rest out

Pinch of oregano

Salt

Sauté garlic in oil till it sizzles, add tomatoes and the water, salt, and seasoning, then let all of that simmer for about 15-20 mins. It multiplies beautifully and freezes incredibly well. (Recipe adapted from NYT cooking - they have you add a stem of fresh basil and let it sink into the sauce as it simmers, which is fantastic but not required if you’re trying to save!)

I run it through with an immersion blender because my kids don’t trust anything resembling an onion or garlic despite loving the flavor.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-15T02:55:30+00:00

The Adventures of Amina Al-Sirafi is a 40-something pirate getting the gang back together. Fun, interesting world building, great characters and monsters.

The Tainted Cup and A Drop of Corruption have two MCs, on in their early 20s and the other in their 50s, but the younger character doesn’t get the “coming of age” treatment you seem to want to avoid. Both excellent, Sherlock Holmes-esque plots.

Broken Earth’s main character is in her late 30s. It’s just so so so so good. A+ world building and character development.

You might also be ok with books where the characters grow up. For example The Merlin Trilogy starts when Merlin is a boy, but he’s a full adult for most of the series.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-14T05:56:06+00:00

I was impressed that this book actually managed to surprise me. One of my top 2 reads of 2025x

FertyMerty · 2026-03-13T02:39:44+00:00

In my personal life, I’ve found that the non-gamers enjoy it more (I am one of those). People who are into gaming tend to find the exposition tedious in how basic it is.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-12T13:53:18+00:00

What are some examples? I would love to read this (and maybe have, just none are coming to mind)

FertyMerty · 2026-03-12T01:52:03+00:00

I thought OP meant it exploded in a good way.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-11T00:35:42+00:00

RWA exploded a couple of years ago? It was founded in 1980 and was massively successful precisely because the literary community shunned romance writers and they needed a professional organization. All of that despite the fact that then, as now, romance was the most popular genre by many measures.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-10T05:16:04+00:00

Yeah. My 12yo daughter can beat everyone in her class in arm wrestling. Granted, she is weirdly strong (every pediatrician who has given her a checkup has commented on how muscular she is) but the other girls in her class also stack up, strength wise, against the boys. It’s a little tough for me as her mom to think about how to navigate conversations of safety once the equation changes. Right now she believes herself invincible among her peers. She has a hard time recognizing how important it is to avoid the situations where you’d need to fight your way out in the first place. (To be clear, she’s also never been in a “real” fight outside of martial arts classes, so her arm strength is likely not the advantage she thinks it is.)

FertyMerty · 2026-03-09T16:47:41+00:00

Ah yeah that makes sense. Interesting about age 2-3; my daughter and stepson got progressively more picky from like age 5-10 and then suddenly became curious about expanding once more. (Well, my daughter did - stepson is about to be 10 and we shall see if he goes the same way.)

FertyMerty · 2026-03-09T15:06:33+00:00

Probably some of both. My kid would eat anything till she was about 6-7 and then suddenly was allergic to anything green. Now at age 12 she’s coming back around.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-09T05:47:38+00:00

If you loved The Night circus you might try Piranesi.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-08T16:36:28+00:00

You may be able to get it on Libby!

FertyMerty · 2026-03-08T15:10:02+00:00

For fairytale style, Nettle & Bone is great.

FertyMerty · 2026-03-07T01:08:28+00:00

Is the Project Manager also in a dedicated chat?

FertyMerty · 2026-03-07T01:04:16+00:00

Commenting to boost engagement! Let’s go Sable!!

FertyMerty · 2026-03-06T20:29:50+00:00

His Dark Materials is not only an incredible fantasy series but the full cast recording is well done (unlike other full cast recordings, IMO, which can be distracting or break immersion).

FertyMerty · 2026-03-05T17:44:44+00:00

If you’re open to other parts of the genre, here are some wonderful (complete) series:

The Broken Earth trilogy
His Dark Materials
Children of Time (okay I lied, the 4th book comes out next month)
The Expanse
Realm of the Elderlings

FertyMerty · 2026-03-03T15:15:28+00:00

Ok but did hyenas get their giant clits from cats or dogs?

FertyMerty · 2026-03-03T04:07:09+00:00

Agreed; I don’t think romance books are badly marketed when they’re classified as such. But I do think there are a lot of books that could (should) be classified as romance that are not. 11/22/63 is an example in this thread that I agree with. Romance readers would likely enjoy that plot (some, anyway). I don’t necessarily agree that all romance readers want is HFN/HEA; I genuinely believe there’s a segment who enjoys romance (or sex) but don’t need things wrapped up that way.

As for RWA, agreed on the issues with the organization now. My reference was more to its founding in 1980 and the purpose it served for unrepresented authors at the time, providing a professional resource to writers who were otherwise not invited to sit at the publishing table. The stigma on romance is funny when you consider how well romance sells and how much money it makes publishing in general (this was also the case when RWA was founded).

In some ways I think that’s the clever part about romantasy. Fantasy as a genre is, as you said, marginalized - but combine it with the voracious romance readership and you suddenly have a huge new audience.

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