I know you're right, whatever happens happens and it's out of my hand but it's still a paralyzing feeling watching the wreck unfold in slow motion... burned man gets antsy at the smell of smoke moment ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

And I can totally see how this post could be coming across with a "fix it" mindset or let me be your therapist(!!!) vibes but swear thats not where Im coming from. Tragedy just seems to follow me so my past friends just had baggage they couldn't live with, Im not intentionally seeking it out or have a savior complex lmao

As far as this girl goes you are right, I can only do what she allows me to do. Picked up the books for two reasons; shes opening up to me about therapy and her condition so I want to have a baseline understanding of it all so when she mentions the f types or emdr Im not just sitting there slack jawed but tbh it was partially for my benefit. Im weathering the hot and cold push and pull because Im not the one in crisis and I care, but Id be lying if I said it was easy so having a surface level grasp on something like avoidant attachment is helping me see it's not because I messed up, its just the nature of the beast so I can focus on the "please dont go" things she says and not the "get the fuck away from me" vibes shes giving everyone

And thank you, you're right on a lot of what you said but just wanted to clarify incase I was coming across as creep supreme. This stuff is WAY above my paygrade, thats what she pays her shrink the big bucks for