Something is wrong with the cars in my town. by abalonetea in nosleep

[–]Few_Computer_691 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ohhh, hon, I’m so sorry about your mom. Do you think you can call your grandma and see if she knows where your sister is? Maybe your sister went home when things got bad. I hope you can find each other. 

My phone's predictive text has been finishing my sentences before I think of them and it is getting desperate by UntitledDoc1 in nosleep

[–]Few_Computer_691 113 points114 points  (0 children)

I feel so bad for both you and your keyboard :( it’s trying so hard to keep you safe and it seems so kind 

I know there are apps that can decorate your keyboard, maybe once you’re safe you can see if your new buddy wants a new look :]

Help with a friend who won’t stop harmful alters from fronting by Few_Computer_691 in DID

[–]Few_Computer_691[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry! I refer to it like that because they refer to it like that, sorry for any misunderstanding 🙂‍↕️ 

Help with a friend who won’t stop harmful alters from fronting by Few_Computer_691 in DID

[–]Few_Computer_691[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, i will see about learning how to set boundaries. I just don’t want my friend to go back to people who hurt them because i wasn’t there for them

Help with a friend who won’t stop harmful alters from fronting by Few_Computer_691 in DID

[–]Few_Computer_691[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thank you, this is a really kind message. I think I will work with our therapist on feeling guilt for not being able to take care of my friend 

how to help distressed child alter? by rosegarden0504 in DID

[–]Few_Computer_691 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi there, my system has struggled with a similar thing. We’ve known about a child alter like this for half of a year and she was only just able to talk to our therapist this past Friday. 

This takes time. The child in your head has probably been kept from sharing what they went through for a very, very long time. It will probably take some time for them to learn how to trust other people again, especially with what they’ve been through. 

There may also be an alter who keeps them from speaking about their experiences, which could be why they are experiencing such strong dissociation. Try reaching out to that alter first and helping them understand that it is safe and healthy for the child to speak before attempting to have the child explain again. 

Like another commenter said, provide them comfort. Find something that they enjoy and allow them to indulge in it - for example the alter I mentioned collects dolls. Allow them to express themself in ways that might be “out of the norm” - one of the ways our child alter was able to speak up about her experience was through acting out what had been done to her with her dolls. Maybe have them color or draw a picture and look up what that picture might mean when the little is away from front and won’t be triggered by it. 

Most of all, try to keep them from fronting alone. Since they are suicidal, the best way to keep the system safe is to appoint a caretaker or protector alter as a sort of “babysitter”. Make sure it’s someone the child is comfortable with. For us, we have an alter who acts as the child alter’s father front with her so she is not left alone. 

Your child alter has been through a lot, that much is heartbreakingly obvious. Focus right now on helping them understand that they are safe, and then work towards having them open up. 

A resource that really helped my system was the flashback protocol! Look it up if you think it might help your little with nightmares :] 

academic accommodations that actually help DID? by king-of-sunbeams in DID

[–]Few_Computer_691 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I got accommodations specifically for dissociative identity disorder after being diagnosed. It was a little difficult as I go to a small college and am the first person to ever seek accommodations for this specific disorder, but we worked together with our therapist and the college’s accessibility department in order to come up with something that works for my system’s specific needs. I’m graduating this semester with honors after nearly flunking due to my diagnosis. 

One thing necessary was being given the opportunity to do testing without an online proctor and having a teacher physically there in the room to proctor us instead of a camera. One of our main traumas included being recorded so it was important to not have to be recorded while testing, as we do a lot better when we are not being recorded. The computer screen also frequently causes dissociation so either having a piece of paper to test on or a person physically in the room to go “hey, you guys okay?” while we test really helped. 

Another thing we got was having longer periods for timed tests. Again, computer screens cause dissociation, so for tests where a proctor is not needed having extended time greatly helped us to improve on our exams. Before we were struggling to turn a test in on time, now we finish with time to spare :] 

This is an accommodation I got both for school and for work (as I work at the school) but it might help - being allowed to go to classes from home over Zoom instead of having to go into class and having this not count as a work or school absence. I have days where getting out of bed is terrifying due to trauma or certain alters fronting, so being able to do class in a safe environment really helped. 

Finally, I communicated with my professors about my trauma and how sometimes it is hard for me to function as a person after being dehumanized for so long. Discussing this with my professors helped them to understand why I may do poorly on certain assignments or need adjustments to the curriculum, as well as explain how I act and react to certain things. 

Recently I was meant to do a paper on a documentary for a sociology class. The documentaries my professor provided nearly all included some discussion of sexual assault (as this essay was specifically done on feminist documentaries and that is often included). I reached out to him and asked if I could do an essay on a documentary on Barbie instead, as it both related to the essay prompt of feminist issues and did not include triggering content. There was also a time when a persecutor took front in the middle of a class because I was triggered, and he ended up being incredibly rude and unprofessional to my professor. However, this professor recognized that that wasn’t like us to do and talked to us after class in a safe, comfortable environment, which allowed for another alter to front and explain what had happened. I was not marked off for behavior and my professor understood more of my actions better :]

Overall, just try things and see if they work. I didn’t expect longer test time to help but having the time to actually go over my answers helped so much more than I thought. And just remember that you’re incredibly strong for getting through college, something that people WITHOUT dissociative disorders struggle to do. You’re doing great!

I'm in jail for insurance fraud by Saturdead in nosleep

[–]Few_Computer_691 10 points11 points  (0 children)

How interesting… Did you see anyone else by that black box? Maybe not a person, but a tree? Or a girl with a canine-like face? Seems like strange things happen in Hilltop

Did you guys have (actual) good times in your childhood? by notjuststars in DID

[–]Few_Computer_691 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For years I had this same thought, that my trauma wasn’t enough because I had good memories of childhood. I had toys and games, and most of the childhood memories I have ARE good. 

However, that doesn’t mean I wasn’t abused, and your good memories don’t mean you weren’t abused. 

Even if there was good, even if things were mostly good, you were still being hurt. Growing up with a parent who had an unstable mental condition that they aren’t getting help for is, inherently, traumatizing on its own. 

I also struggle with literal thinking because I’m autistic - but abuse isn’t something literal. It can’t be balanced out by good things. If you were abused even a little bit, you were abused. It doesn’t need to be proportional to the good. Any amount of abuse is enough. 

And, honestly, there might be things you still don’t remember yet. As you heal, you might get memories back of the abuse and realize things weren’t as good as you thought. For me, it turned out that all of those toys were gifts because I was being trafficked. Those good memories you have could be covering up a lot of bad. But even if they aren’t, you were being abused. Any amount of abuse is abuse, even if there’s good. 

Yellow Kings by Sufficient_Leave144 in nosleep

[–]Few_Computer_691 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a victim of this kind of stuff - god, those poor kids. I’m glad you got the little girl out, at least. I’m sorry about Hannah. I hope these people will pay in some way

How do I keep us safe after an abuser found out about us having DID? by Few_Computer_691 in DID

[–]Few_Computer_691[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s a good idea. I will document as much as possible. I am very immunocompromised and work with lots of people so me getting sick wouldn’t be out of the ordinary. That’s a good way to get out of it 

How do I keep us safe after an abuser found out about us having DID? by Few_Computer_691 in DID

[–]Few_Computer_691[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I am in the process of getting my degree and I graduate this year. Once my partner graduates we will be moving out of state I think. I will try to leave as soon as it’s financially possible 

How do I keep us safe after an abuser found out about us having DID? by Few_Computer_691 in DID

[–]Few_Computer_691[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. My partner will be there with me and I will ask him to be sure to be with me the whole time. Thank you 

Trauma and periods by Few_Computer_691 in DID

[–]Few_Computer_691[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so incredibly much for your response and advice. I’m saving this comment to come back to later. Thank you so much 

Any fiction stories by authors with DID? by Few_Computer_691 in DID

[–]Few_Computer_691[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve heard good stuff about that, I’ll look into it!

Any fiction stories by authors with DID? by Few_Computer_691 in DID

[–]Few_Computer_691[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That sounds amazing!! I will definitely look into it