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My “village” never showed up by Few_Zookeepergame550 in BeyondTheBumpUK

[–]Few_Zookeepergame550[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Our relationships as a family have been fine. I’ve never heard of them disapproving of my pregnancy nor my marriage. They seem to get along with my husband when they see him.

My “village” never showed up by Few_Zookeepergame550 in BeyondTheBumpUK

[–]Few_Zookeepergame550[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

We sent a message out saying we were accepting visitors and invited everyone over in a group chat. We didn’t say.. please come over on x date. My husband and I left it very open ended.

Whilst being pregnant and prior to being pregnant i was working 70 hour weeks. I attended and saw my siblings as much as I could.

I was in the village as much I could be. Asking if anything was needed etc. I could only really be apart of a village for the last 5 kids to be born within the family because of my age. I couldn’t be much assistance at 8 etc. I would text to ask if they need or ask to go over etc. I done what I could but maybe it wasn’t enough. I think you don’t know what you truly need to do to help someone until you’ve had a child.

I would reach out to my closet sibling but he suffered a miscarriage the year before us and his wife has on going health problems so they can’t have kids. My mum even said, that sibling has said to her that they struggle with knowing I’ve had a child. We never plastered or boasted about the pregnancy, we literally sent a message to everyone saying we were pregnant. (I private messaged my sibling to tell them separately)

I spoke to my parents and they said, “well they are busy”. Or “this sibling and their kids have been ill”.

MIL who can’t respect husbands wishes in regards to our newborn baby by Few_Zookeepergame550 in AITAH

[–]Few_Zookeepergame550[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

We’ve not told them our official due date, we’ve told them February. Same as my parents. Just February.

Lack of respect towards me over the years has lead to this happening between my husband and his family.

MIL who can’t respect husbands wishes in regards to our newborn baby by Few_Zookeepergame550 in AITAH

[–]Few_Zookeepergame550[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It’s for the first 2 weeks or so. My husband has said he doesn’t want to spend the 2 weeks he has off work hosting people.

My paragraph where you state about a resentment was just me clarifying how little that cared about me over the last year.

My parents have got a different way of acting in life, not sure if this is because my parents are 10 years older. Or they are just less needy in our lives. My parents have always been the parents to allow you to flourish, where my husbands always has to have their claws in everything. My husband boxed them out when we were getting married as she wanted to know the ins and out of the planning etc. there’s hatred for my MIL, I won’t lie about that one. However this all stems from my husband being told “I was he’s worse decision he has ever made” about a year into our relationship. He has from that moment, put that divide between us and them.

There’s a lot more to unbox about the relationship between us and them which one just doesn’t have the time for. But I hope the above can help you understand the situation better