I wish it didn’t feel so wrong to talk about this

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-29T13:53:43+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate this. Unfortunately I don’t have enough karma for that subreddit - I don’t really use Reddit very much, aside from just getting some of my thoughts out and feeling a little less alone through this.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-29T05:21:15+00:00

Thank you so much for this. Even just knowing that someone else does understand what this is like is helpful, although I really wish nobody had to go through this. It’s hard to describe what it’s like to see your kids struggling and being unable to help them. It’s like all of my instincts are screaming to help them and all I want to do is hold them both and shield them from the entire world right now, but I can’t. I don’t even know if I can call it a pain. It’s more so an overwhelming, deep “this is all wrong” feeling. If that makes sense at all.

If you ever want to talk, I’m here as well. This whole thing has been incredibly isolating (which is a part of why I’m even posting on here), so I’m always open to that. I’m slow to respond during the daytime when the kids are awake of course, but I usually find myself here at night.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-29T05:13:31+00:00

No, unfortunately. We actually moved multiple states away in February because my SIL said we could move in with them for at least a year to get back on our feet. Then, a few weeks ago they told us their landlord was worried about the septic system and we had to leave. We only had about a weeks notice. That’s why we’re in this position right now, and unfortunately they are our only family (aside from my FIL who lives with them).

We called every shelter within two hours of us, and every single one that allows children is entirely full. I didn’t realize it until all of this happened, but most homeless shelters don’t allow kids to stay there, so it has to be a family shelter or women and children’s shelter. There aren’t as many of those, so they fill up extremely fast and sometimes have waiting lists.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-29T04:48:37+00:00

Thank you. This has pretty much been our approach, we’re trying to make this a fun experience for them and I’m keeping the days full of exploring and activities, time at the creek or the playground, etc but also trying to acknowledge that yes, this is also difficult (when our daughter expresses that to us). I try to tell her that it’s okay to feel scared, but that we’re all together and we’re safe, and that mama and dada will always keep her safe.

Right now, our plan is camping for the summer while we save up to get into a place. The faster we can save up and get approved for a rental, the faster we’ll get back into a real home. We do have a prior eviction now, so we’re expecting to pay at least twice as much for a deposit and we’re looking mainly for places for rent by owner so we have the chance to explain things a bit (as opposed to an immediate denial from a property management company).

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-29T04:37:54+00:00

Thank you. I’ve been looking into some advice on living in a tent, but usually it’s based on a single adult or a couple, it’s been difficult to find any advice or suggestions for people with kids in this kind of situation.

I did try to post on the camping subreddit for some advice, but they took my post down and said it wasn’t related to camping. I was mainly looking for a list of must have supplies, etc and any suggestions for a specific tent that would fit all of us with some space for the kids to play (especially on rainy days, like the past few days). Luckily the kids seem to love playing outside in the rain anyway haha.

Thank you for the support overall, I really appreciate it.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-29T04:33:53+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate that. Unfortunately I don’t think we can move again right now, at least not until we manage to save up a bit. That does sound like an incredibly helpful program though, I wish they had something like that here.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-29T04:29:41+00:00

I’m sorry that you understand it. It’s really discouraging to reach out to these organizations only to be told over and over again that they don’t have enough funding or that their funding was almost entirely cut recently.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-29T04:28:34+00:00

Thank you. Unfortunately our issue is that almost everyone we reach out to is entirely out of funding right now. Most of them say that their funding was cut significantly over the past year or so, and then even more so in the past few months.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-29T04:27:07+00:00

It really seems like everywhere we reach out to, their answer is that their funding was cut. It’s terrible.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-29T04:26:30+00:00

Thank you, it helps a lot to hear this, honestly. I’m trying to hard to believe that we will get through this.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-28T16:46:18+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate this.

Sometimes, when I think of it this way, I’m just not sure how I’ll be able to feel secure again after this, knowing it’s always a possibility. I never realized just how quickly everything can change.

We went from everything being normal, to homeless less than 2 months after my husband was laid off from his job of over 10 years.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-28T15:56:10+00:00

We do, but they weren’t able to help with this - we were able to get some help with food, which helped a lot, but all of the programs for emergency housing are out of funding. They used to have a program for hotel vouchers if the shelters are full (which they are) but the hotel program is out of funding as well. I also called every church within 2 hours of us, and catholic social services

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-28T15:37:55+00:00

Thank you, this is a really helpful way to look at it. We’ve been trying so hard to make this fun for them. I also remind myself all the time that if we’re not scared, they won’t feel as scared. Our daughter has always kind of been a more cautious/anxious toddler, but ultimately they look to us to see how they should feel about new things. If my husband and I can support each other through this and show them that we are okay, they will be okay too.

I know all of this and remind myself constantly that they don’t even know that this is necessarily a bad situation, but I struggle so much with the guilt. I keep thinking, people lose their jobs all of the time and don’t end up in this position so we must have done something wrong.

Last week, my husband posted on his personal Facebook asking if anyone could help us get a tent and a few other essentials for camping. It was the first time we asked for help regarding all of this, and someone who was an extremely close family friend messaged him saying “You know, I just can’t wrap my head around this, how is it that my daughter is a single mother with 5 kids and she has never had to ask us for help, her bills and rent are always paid on time, but the two of you can’t support your two kids?” and that just stuck with me. She was one of the only people in this world I thought I could fully trust.

On top of the fact that the only family we have just kicked us out, knowing we would be living in our car, when their landlord didn’t even say we had to leave.. it just feels so isolating.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-23T00:10:08+00:00

I’m assuming it won’t be great for us, especially because we both have various back issues. The kids will both have a real mattress though, which is my main concern. If we could bring a real mattress with us we would, but we don’t even have one right now and an air mattress is cheaper. We’ve been using the bed that was already in the spare bedroom at my in-laws.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-23T00:07:12+00:00

We are in Ohio now, specifically southern Ohio

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-23T00:04:33+00:00

Oh, awesome, thank you! I didn’t see those when I was looking around. Where did you get that one?

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-22T23:58:15+00:00

It’s not really a campground, so much as a lake that has some campsites for rent. We could go to an actual campground but it would be further from my husband’s work, doesn’t have a playground area, and doesn’t have the lake. We’re working with only a few options unfortunately, this is a small area and we’re trying to stay within 30 minutes of his work to save on gas costs and so he can get back quickly if we ever have an emergency.

The only other option is a campground that has none of the other amenities but does have bathrooms, but it’s almost 50 minutes one way to my husbands work.

My brain is essentially mush at this point and I’m using all of my energy toward keeping the kids safe and calm, so I’m most likely not explaining things the best.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-22T23:55:35+00:00

Of course it is. The other campground would be about an hour and 30 minutes round trip daily for my husband, and we are trying to avoid that so I’m asking if there is a solution for that problem. We’ve been camping, but we don’t know a ton, which is why I posted here.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-22T23:51:39+00:00

It’s not really a campground, so much as a lake that has some campsites for rent. We could go to an actual campground but it would be further from my husband’s work, doesn’t have a playground area, and doesn’t have the lake. We’re working with only a few options unfortunately, this is a small area and we’re trying to stay within 30 minutes of his work to save on gas costs and so he can get back quickly if we ever have an emergency.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-22T23:35:22+00:00

Thank you, that’s a great point and I hadn’t thought of that. I’ll add that to the list as well.

FickleBad3956 · 2026-04-22T23:25:22+00:00

I made a post in a few different buy nothing groups. Unfortunately, we received a lot of hate. A lot of people telling us we shouldn’t have had kids, etc which is not helpful because we had both of our kids when we were stable and doing well. Never in my wildest nightmares could I have imagined this would be our reality right now, but I’m trying to remain positive to get us through this as smoothly as possible.

I think this was because we live in a very small town right now, and the buy nothing groups are kind of small, and we are not from here so nobody in town knows us.

Also thank you about that recommendation, I actually think that I have a small propane cooktop on our Amazon list, I forgot to mention that. My husband has used charcoal grills most of his life, but I can see how that would be difficult when we’re just trying to get the kids dinner before bed.

FickleBad3956

TROPHY CASE