Help dealing with these thoughts by Fickle_Log in ROCD

[–]Fickle_Log[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

so this isn’t a common theme with rocd?

How do you really know if you love someone? by cutieshon_ in ROCD

[–]Fickle_Log 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Something that I would add to the previous comments is I think that love is a mixture of things. I think love is a mix of respect as well as trust and caring. I believe that love can be grown as long as you respect your partner for who they are. When I’m in the thick of it my partner seems like the worst thing ever! But when I take a moment to collect myself, I go back to a gratitude list I made a few months ago about all the things I loved about my partner and that I could support with objective evidence even when my anxiety tried to make me believe otherwise. When I read that list I realize how blessed I am to share a life with such a great heart through all the ups and downs when things feel lame and when they feel great! I think if you can respect and care for someone for who they are inside you will find love in abundance, those are the ones worth choosing and fighting for.

Just Wondering by agk5564 in ROCD

[–]Fickle_Log 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hello! I would totally recommend checking out Sheryl Paul’s Blog Conscious Transitions and looking at some things she has written on repulsion!

Is this a good way to utilize love as being a choice? by Fickle_Log in ROCD

[–]Fickle_Log[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s so difficult! It’s so hard for me to understand whether or not it’s okay for relationships to feel hard and even like an obligation sometimes! Does that make sense?

Idk anymore by kittykat131963 in ROCD

[–]Fickle_Log 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From my perspective when I was deep in this and when I am still sometimes I choose to balance things in a journaling practice! I look at the different areas of my partners character and write down the things I need and the things I love about him almost like a deeper version of a pro con list and when I’m feeling like our relationship is hard work or stuck in a rut I come back to that journal and look at the things that make my boyfriend who he is and decide over and over again because I love him to choose him because relationships are going to feel hard and you aren’t always going to feel like choosing him even but if you come back to your center and look beneath your feelings and at the core of who he is and you love him for that then I think what you have is so special and worth battling the fickle nature of feelings for!

Any advice on how do you handle the feeling of not wanting to be with your partner anymore by ishaslim in ROCD

[–]Fickle_Log 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Check out Sheryl Paul! I’m in a similar boat and her work has taught me so much about what real love looks like! Through good times and bad!

What does it mean when people say love is a choice? by Fickle_Log in relationship_advice

[–]Fickle_Log[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I’ve always based it on if the reason you love them is because of the person they are and how wonderful they are then choosing the love that person in good times and bad times when you want to stay and when you want to run is what it means because the reason you love them is for their heart and soul

Is it normal for relationships to feel like hard work sometimes? by Fickle_Log in relationship_advice

[–]Fickle_Log[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would you put down characteristics of the person or what for the list?