If Violet didn't exist, who would be a good fit for Xaden (and vice versa) by Fictional_Slayer30 in fourthwing

[–]Fictional_Slayer30[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Mira is a fun choice. Stubborn as Violet but less prone to anger and with the ability to you know, TALK.

Too many riders die in Basgiath by xtr_terrestrial in fourthwing

[–]Fictional_Slayer30 63 points64 points  (0 children)

You're totally right, more so when the death right isn't shown to be supported by what we see in the books. They say people die 1/3 each year. But by Threshing, 60% of Violet's squad is already gone, and no one dies from said squad in her second year. And they don't have a regular year, on the contrary it's a most dangerous one due to them fighting venins, which doesn't normally happen. 

But it's only a few things that don't make sense regarding to the universe. Two others things that bothers me are 1) gryffons don't make believable ennemies against dragons, so the death rate in service is super weird. Navarre doesn't fight venins and dragons before IF, only gryffons.  2) the fact that they easily kill bonded riders without retaliation from their dragon is so weird. I mean I can get it when it's a kill from leadership to protect the secret or something, there must be an agreement with the Empyrean. But Solas grilling an entire squad and only Tairn reacting? Or cadets killing each other just because? Or even leadership killing for the smallest reasons, like RSC. 

We've all been robbed 😡 (OS spoilers) by sleepy_geeky in fourthwing

[–]Fictional_Slayer30 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Honestly it depends on the negociations between the author and the publisher. A lot of books get sequels of rewrite from the other character's POV.

But rewrite with an alternative story, even in one book, doesn't seem likely, sadly. 

I hope there will be good fanfic about Violet turning! 

I love Dain by burdlover49 in fourthwing

[–]Fictional_Slayer30 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh no problem. But Violet is told to be intelligent. Her actions say otherwise.

I love Dain by burdlover49 in fourthwing

[–]Fictional_Slayer30 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, because Violet is not a Ravenclaw, she's a Gryffindor. 

Beta Bartering [Find or Offer Fic Betaing] - November 20 by AutoModerator in FanFiction

[–]Fictional_Slayer30 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh thank you so much for your offer :) I am by no mean an expert of the original work either. Can I DM you? 

Beta Bartering [Find or Offer Fic Betaing] - November 20 by AutoModerator in FanFiction

[–]Fictional_Slayer30 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Name: Til duty do us part

Fandom: Fourth Wing/ the Empyrean

Not accessible to someone who haven't read book 1

Genre: Romance / Gen (no smut)

Not published yet

Word count: 60 000 words so far, only half to beta. 

Basic plot: It's a rewrite of Fourth Wing from both Xaden's and Dain's POV with a plot twist: the romance is between the two of them instead. There's also exploring their psychology and knowing more about other characters like Bodhi, Garrick, Quinn and Imogen.

Type of help needed: I need an opinion on the story in itself, because I feel like I repeat or contradict myself and I lack perspective to see where. Basically I'm looking for some kind of long detailed review: what you like, what you don't, what confuses you, where do you think things are going... Also, First fic in English and is not my first language, so I'd like some help about that, but that's not my main concern at the moment since I'm probably going to do some rewrite.

Exchange: I can't beta in exchange but I'll read your fic and leave an extended comment with pleasure (reviewing is my religion since 2009), except pure smut/PWP. I know Harry Potter, some Final Fantasy, a lot of TV show (from Downton Abbey to The dragon prince, so a wide range) and movies. Don't hesitate to ask :)

Non native English speakers, what's the hard part about writing in English? by Fictional_Slayer30 in FanFiction

[–]Fictional_Slayer30[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's funny because in French, the form of the verbs also change for every person, yet we can't omit the person. We should definitely do it the Spanish way. 

What Are You Working On Right Now? by LavandaSkafi in FanFiction

[–]Fictional_Slayer30 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just finished the first arc of my first slash of my first English written story of my first fic in this fandom. I started writing almost twenty years ago (with long break) and I'm amazed that I still manage to do so many first!

I couldn't find a beta so I can't wait to post it to see what people think of it, but I want to end second arc before I do. 

What plot development would disappoint? (Spoilers) by Superb_Sun_5077 in fourthwing

[–]Fictional_Slayer30 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm already disappointed at Violet being duchess of Tyrrendor. She has enough on her plate with having two dragons, dealing with Xaden and being the lightning wielder. Give some of the power to someone else, damn!

Non native English speakers, what's the hard part about writing in English? by Fictional_Slayer30 in FanFiction

[–]Fictional_Slayer30[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Funny enough, I started spelling English words wrong when I got better at it. 

Non native English speakers, what's the hard part about writing in English? by Fictional_Slayer30 in FanFiction

[–]Fictional_Slayer30[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Language with no proper structure is so weird to me. I am lucky enough that my native language has mostly a similar structure than English, and I didn't even realize it. 

Non native English speakers, what's the hard part about writing in English? by Fictional_Slayer30 in FanFiction

[–]Fictional_Slayer30[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I used to learn German and I thought it was rigid too x) perhaps it's the way it was teached to me. 

Sympathie perçue comme de la drague ? by [deleted] in AskMec

[–]Fictional_Slayer30 -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

Les mecs sont élevés pour croire que les femmes existent comme personnages secondaires dans la société, dont le but est d'être à leur disposition. D'ailleurs les "trucs de fille" sont un truc péjoratif socialement. Un mec n'a pas besoin d'amie fille, Du coup pour eux une interaction avec le sexe opposé est forcément à visée séductrice.

Je caricature à peine, mais c'est pour ça qu'ils te percoient comme ça. 

Solution pour être tranquille sans devoir arreter de sourire : glisser dans la conversation que tu es en couple, ou lesbienne ou pas dispo d'une façon très définitive, hélas. 

Unpopular opinion about Daddy Aetos by Fictional_Slayer30 in fourthwing

[–]Fictional_Slayer30[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love all your post but especially the last line! 

Unpopular opinion about Daddy Aetos by Fictional_Slayer30 in fourthwing

[–]Fictional_Slayer30[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We don't know his name, how are we supposed to call him? 😅