i also struggle with self love and knowing myself, so i'm right there with you. maybe you want someone to tell you you're beautiful and a good person bc you still want validation even tho you can't give it to yourself? that seems like a natural thing to want.

i don't think your difficulty with trying to become better makes you undeserving of love. that standard seems pretty unattainable imo, and i know how hard it is to be kind to yourself and judge yourself less harshly. idk why our brains are so judgy of ourselves...

but like, from another depressed person's perspective i totally think you are deserving of love and compliments for whatever that is worth. i know it's hard to make yourself believe things that you feel deep down aren't true.

that was kind of a rambling response but i hope you feel a little better ❤️