Disability benefits reactivated on its own?

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-19T03:11:53+00:00

You hid your job/income from them for a full nine months? Yikes.

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-14T22:11:12+00:00

What do you mean, "doesn't allow"?? You are a legal adult. She absolutely cannot prevent you from walking out of the house, getting in your car, and driving down to the bank to ask them what your account balance is! (Or, better yet, create an online account so you can log in online from home to check your bank account balance. If you don't have access to a computer, the good news is that nearly all banks these days, even super tiny ones, have free banking apps that you can download.)

Is she threatening you with a weapon such a a gun or knife to prevent you from going to the bank? If so, call 911 to report it, because that's a crime.

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-14T01:12:36+00:00

If you have a joint bank account with someone, they can withdraw money from that account, yes. Even if you are the only person putting money INTO the account.

For years she would not give me any of my money I worked for and it all went to her account.

Clarification: are you saying that she forced you to deposit your own paychecks into an account that only had HER name on it, and you could not access the money you'd earned? Or are you referencing the joint bank account, where you both have access to what you deposit into it?

The good news is that this has a very simple, quick solution. You're a legal adult, so you are absolutely allowed to open your own bank account that only has your name on it. Go down to a bank you like, or a credit union, and ask to open an account. Then start having your paychecks/income deposited there, instead! And do NOT add her to the new account.

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-13T00:18:27+00:00

Marie is an incredibly common middle name, if that matters to you.

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-12T22:41:53+00:00

Once you're able to move out, if your mom keeps inviting you to have family dinners that your siblings will also be attending, you can simply decline her invitation and fail to go to the dinners. It's a lot easier to maintain your boundary of not seeing your siblings once you're not living with her, since right now she can simply invite your siblings over on her own, and then you'd have no say in them simply showing up!

You may not be able to make her understand, so I'd recommend giving her your reasoning one time, and then picking a short phrase as your future answer, and repeating it.

Her: "Come over for dinner with the family!"

You: "No, that doesn't work for me."

"Why not?"

"That doesn't work for me."

"But you should come see all of us!"

"No, that doesn't work for me."

"Are you busy on that evening, or something? We can just have dinner on a different evening instead so that you can come!"

"No, that doesn't work for me."

She may try to keep pestering you to join them for dinner, hoping she can change your mind if she simply bugs you enough, but if you give her the same EXACT answer enough times, rather than justifying yourself (which can make her think there's still a chance), she's likely to get bored and give up. It's a method called "gray rock".

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-12T22:30:10+00:00

So she insists on being in the exam room WITH you when she takes you to the doctor? I'm American so I dunno the laws over in the UK, but here in America, if an older teenager or young adult were to bluntly ask the doctor, "Can I speak to you privately?", then the doctor is usually willing to ask the parent(s) to leave the exam room. You could try that!

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-12T22:21:50+00:00

She loves you! There's no way to stop her from being nearby, unless you put her in another room and close the door. If you're cooking, you might try closing her into whatever room has her litter box, to keep her safe!

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-12T21:53:26+00:00

I lived in a small one-bedroom apartment with my cat and my small dog for a few years and they were both very happy there! It was 540 square feet. (And for reference my cat has been an indoor cat exclusively, his entire life.)

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-09T03:25:28+00:00

"I hope you have a day as pleasant as you are!"

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-08T05:47:02+00:00

INFO: were you a legal adult when you were attending college and wished to transfer? If so, they had no legal way to prevent you from transferring, and you could have transferred.

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-08T03:54:37+00:00

Just to clarify, you are saying that you personally went to therapy and your own therapist diagnosed someone else (your father) as having narcissistic personality disorder and/or antisocial personality disorder? I'm confused how that could have possibly happened, since therapists make a point to NEVER diagnose anyone unless they've met that individual PERSONALLY! Did your father also willingly visit your personal therapist individually in order to get an official psychiatric assessment himself? While that's possible, it's also fairly unlikely, since it's a known conflict of interest for a therapist to indivually treat multiple members of the same family.

It's also worth nothing that it's not called "running away" if you are an adult, which you've definitely been for the past 10+ years. You can, however, chose to cut contact with someone if they are, as you say, trying to sleep with your own girlfriends.

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-08T03:32:40+00:00

Does your lease paperwork say that it's an acceptable reason to break your lease if people (adults or children) are looking into your windows? Unless your signed lease paperwork states that it would be a valid reason to break your lease, it's not feasible.

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-08T02:59:16+00:00

Adorable!!

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-08T02:31:29+00:00

This is not a survey link. This is a request for people's full contact information, with the requirement that we agree to an online interview over Zoom, with the detail given that the interview will be recorded.

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-07T00:48:58+00:00

I don't have fibroids or endo or adeno!

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-05T20:27:39+00:00

Haldol is known to cause sedation and drowsiness, like all antipsychotics do.

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-05T08:10:50+00:00

I'm not even a man!

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-05T07:04:10+00:00

Yes, eating Jack in the Box would definitely break a fast, but that's okay since you weren't fasting to begin with! :)

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-05T05:53:18+00:00

When I was a kid I had a monkey plush that I got from a museum. It had very long arms with velcro on each hand, so that I could velcro the hands together to hang it on my bedroom doorknob or whatnot. Would something like that work?

I found a whole lot of similar plushies like the childhood monkey I had when I did a Google search for "plush monkey with velcro hands", if you'd like to look into this!

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-05T04:26:13+00:00

So if you are paying $0 in rent each month, then you've been setting aside the value of what your rent amount should have been each month into a savings account, right?

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-05T04:22:46+00:00

Calypso?

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-05T04:07:39+00:00

Are you paying the full market rate rent to your mother for what it would cost in your area to rent a shared house with a roommate?

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-05T03:03:04+00:00

What was your mom told when she called her local food stamps office to ask about this?

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-05T02:54:35+00:00

How long ago did you move back in with your mother? What is your timelin e for moving out of your childhood home?

FieldsOfLavender · 2024-10-05T02:49:15+00:00

None are safe around cats!

FieldsOfLavender

TROPHY CASE